These OC bitches are the biggest beef eaters of all Housewives.
I think I mentioned that before when they were out to dinner and all ordered steak, but here we are again. Emily Tamra and Gina all order ‘burgers?’
SoCal ladies I would think would be eating salads and seafood. Not burgers, fries and big honkin’ slabs of beef.
Speaking of beef, Tamra is planning a ‘night of seduction’ with Eddie. And sadly, we were forced to witness it. This could have been done in a tasteful way, however Bravo chose to NOT go that route.
******
Why is THE Heather DuBrow at a discount sunglasses shop that offers ‘free prescription lenses?’
At least she arrives dressed to the nines in a $5,000 for her free lenses.
Heather, Jenn and Carmella discuss Carmella’s party and this new ‘sensitivity’ thing of Heather’s.
Is it that Heather’s suddenly ‘so sensitive’ or is it that no one dared say anything to her before?
We’re going to milk this thing with Heather pretending she’s looking for an apartment for Max to supposedly go to law school in San Diego, and using Carmella as a Realtor, instead of Gina.
OMG, so dumb. You don’t even need a Realtor for a rental.
She chooses Carmella since she has experience in San Diego. Heather could look for an apartment HERSELF online. OR her daughter could all by herself. If she’s going to law school I’m sure she can figure it out.
Seems Vicki’s guy is getting mad about the comments she’s been making about his wiener and their sex life, so now she’s back pedaling. If I don’t want to picture Shane and Emily, I for damned sure don’t want to picture those two.
Previously everyone laughed about him dangling the ring over her head, now it’s suddenly a travesty.
I thought it was funny. Vicki seemed to also, and admitted in her yap she knows she can be a lot.
******
We witness a real-live interaction between them so we can decide for ourselves.
Vicki bitches at him for giving her a bite of food that’s too hot.
There’s another day of no ring for Vicki.
They bicker about Vicki working too much. They seem to be still together, from what I’ve seen, however she does not have that ring.
He comes off to me a little bossy, possibly controlling and mad she has other things going on.
At their ages, and after many failed relationships between them, (don’t know his history, I’m assuming) he needs to chill out.
In one of the first eps this season, she made it seem like he does his thing, she does hers, and it’s super chill and it works.
No, not the case. He seems like a whiny insecure man-child. Color me shocked.
They always do that though, talk these guys up, before we see for ourselves what they’re really like, and they’re usually the opposite.
I don’t think he’s pissed about her working at her actual job. I think he’s annoyed she is doing the Housewife thing.
******
The girls all surprised Shannon for her birthday, showing up at her house with pizza, balloons, cake, gifts. The whole thing.
I couldn’t help but notice her house is really small (for OVER 10 GRAND/month. Location location location! What really got me, though, is that it seems even smaller than Gina’s old townhouse that Shannon turned her nose up at because it was so small.
If we all remember that. “It’s nice, this is really NICE.”
Tamra still working on reeling Shannon in, begs her to have lunch with her one-on-one.
Shannon plays hard to get. She should really avoid having anything more than a casual acquaintance type relationship with Tamra.
******
I guess my takeaway from Jenn’s scene with her boys would be, why does Grayson say “I liked it when I had a therapist.” Why past tense?
Most teenage boys wouldn’t feel comfortable talking to a therapist, and if that was helping him, why would he not still be doing that? Even though I’m not a big ‘therapy’ person myself, it seems weird Jenn wouldn’t have him still going.
I think she’s a good mom but she’s kind of a bobble head, and in her own world.
******
Tamra and Eddie have their ‘spice it up’ date, unfortunately for us. I saw things I didn’t need to see. It did seem somewhat forced and awkward. Eddie was chugging his tequila like he did the red wine in the bathtub scene many years ago.
Her body is ridiculous. (‘I’m SO JEALOUS!’)
Tamra is upfront how they talked about divorce six months prior, and that got her attention, to maybe stop being an asshole. Eddie seems like THE most easy going guy ever. Certainly the most chill House Husband in history.
I feel like there was a lot more leading up to that than the one fight at Big Bear as she tries to elude. I think they’ve been having problems for a while.
******
Shannon tries to invite Vicki to the lunch with Tamra she finally agreed to, and admits she’s not ready to be one on one with her.
Long story short, Shannon doesn’t trust her. Tamra agrees.
In a strange twist, Tamra decided to ditch Shannon and Vicki, and join a different lunch with Jenn, Emily and Heather instead.
WHAT a rebel.
Shannon and Vicki meet up, supposedly unbeknownst to the fact that Tamra has bailed.
Quick Fashion Police moment: Why on this beautiful sunny SoCal day in April are they wearing black leather? And yes they’re dressed EXACTLY alike. Vicki also had on a horrible black leather dress at Shannon’s on her birthday. Other than a basic leather jacket or coat, I thinks she’s aged out of wearing leather and should stop.
Tamra sends an ugly gaudy flower arrangement to the restaurant, along with this stupid Tamra-sounding condescending message, which does nothing but prove Shannon’s point.
She hasn’t changed and she still fucking sucks.
Simultaneously, Tamra reads the message from her phone at her gathering.
This is so dumb.
Her note says that she doesn’t want to make Shannon feel UN-COM-FORT-ABLE, and more asinine gripes that I won’t bore you with. (If you were watching The Valley, you will get that) so she decided to bail.
Jenn’s off in lala land while Tamra was reading it. See what I mean? Her kid probably told her that he wants to still go to therapy but she was busy zoning out thinking about what skimpy outfit she can wear for Ryan
Jenn claims the card message ‘was good’ until the end where she called herself ‘Tamra Grudge.’ Seriously?? That was the BEST part, that she can acknowledge she hold grudges.
The whole thing was bitchy and passive aggressive. MY GOD WOMAN. Maybe she just wanted to kiss Tamra’s ass. Who knows.
Shannon bitches about Tamra’s questioning of Vicki’s relationship at her pop-up party. They do a flash on an unaired scene which seems to be the thing to do now.
Yes Tamra there are some flaws and red flags with this guy, because why? Because he’s a fucking man, that’s why. Why the hell is he in his 60’s and single? Oh, I know, because he sucks. Now he’s Vicki’s problem.
I don’t know what that ‘I succumb to him’ was all about, but that was a pretty weird thing for her to say. I don’t think that’s the word she meant to say. I hope not anyway.
Yes Tamra, you have Eddie. He’s great, he’s chill and easy going but he’s also got some issues. So, I guess you just gotta pick and choose. Such as what’s Eddie do for a job? Yeah that’s what I thought. And other challenges too that I won’t mention right now. I don’t want to start getting into that and making Tamra mad at me again.
She needs to sit the hell down. By the way Eddie hasn’t been on camera too much either. Where’s he been? Living at Big Bear is the rumor.
Maybe, like Eddie, Mike doesn’t want to be part of the show either. If the guy was clamoring to be in on all of Vicki’s scenes and wanting to be the center of attention, you’d accuse him of using her to be on TV. At least he has a job. Since the gym, what’s Eddie been doing?
Tamra allegedly is spreading around this ‘theory’ that Mike gave her this phantom ring and then took it back.
I would be remiss in pointing out that if Vicki’s saying how Mike can’t stand this Housewife drama, why did she want to return to the show so badly? And why is he even on? These are questions that I have. Seems like a bad decision.
Heather shares with her lunch group, as we do these stupid back and forth scenes that I love so much, that she has Carmella helping her daughter find an apartment in San Diego. I addressed my thoughts on that earlier.
The whole thing as an actual grievance is reachy.
Of course Gina is getting her panties in a bunch over it. I’m sure whatever commission on putting together a rental if any, is minimal. They can easily bypass the help of a Realtor, which I’m sure they all know. But we’re pretending like we don’t know.
Gina HAPPENS to be absent from this lunch coincidentally. She’s too busy Realtor-ing rentals I am sure.
Heather tries to sell us how much she loves Carmella.
They call her out on some pissy comments she had made off-camera, that she’s trash and doesn’t fit in.
Heather plays dumb that she doesn’t know what the fuck she said.
Love Jenn getting lippy with Heather. You can see Heather looking taken aback by that. No one talks to her like that. And it’s the last thing you’d expect from Jenn of all people.
Heather admits she pre-judged, is appreciative of her help, and feels badly. Supposedly.
Stupid hollow Emily had prepared lines ready to attack Heather, which seemed out of context when Heather just fucking admitted she made a mistake. I get it, that’s not normally how we do things here, so it’s unexpected. Was she even listening to what Heather said??
She’s ALLLLLL worked up. You can tell because she’s got those arms along with the mouth flapping. I kind of feel like they’re connected with her. Like when you cry your nose runs. That type of thing.
Emily shut your fucking hole in your head and listen. Your planned dialogue no longer makes sense because Heather AGREED with you all, that she made a snap judgment. Put the hands DOWN on the table and STFU.
I’m mad I can no longer say ‘chubby arms’ when referring to the way she flails them around when she’s excited and yelling at someone.
******
Jenn’s sundress ‘intuitive reading’ thing in the park gets going. I can tell you right now NONE of these women, aside from Shannon, are spiritual and into this kind of thing.
I don’t know why one would wear heels to walk in a grassy area, but here we are showing up in heels.
Tamra badly needs for Heather to acknowledge the phantom ‘awkwardness’ when Shannon and Vicki arrive because of her no-show at this stupid lunch. Heather’s like “yeah I forgot all about that…”
Because it was not very memorable. Heather don’t give a fuck.
We forgot about it too. Shannon and Vickie probably did as well, and I’m sure those ugly flowers got left at the restaurant.
The medium/psychic/whatever lady wants them to close their eyes and “listen to what the universe is telling them.”
It’s a little hokey. It requires some thinking outside the box. Thought that they loved their ‘boxes’ this season.
These deep-as-a-puddle bitches can’t even TRY to play along.
This was funny: When the reader asks what they all felt the universe was telling them, Emily spouts off ‘guilt’ from not being with her kids enough (or contributing when she is home.)
Maybe she WAS listening to Shane! Although I’m not sure how guilty she truly feels. If she did, she would try to improve, and she hasn’t don’t that. It’s just words. Whatever.
Heather pulls Carmella aside and apologizes for calling her trashy. I think the “I really like you, you’re a fantastic girl, I’m excited to see you” was a little over the top.
Seems like she’s trying too hard to convince the audience how much she likes Carmella. She kind of sounded like she was talking to a little kid.
I honestly don’t think she’s all that enthused about being her friend. She’s so not the type of person Heather would want to associate with.
Temily couldn’t be more pissed off about all of this apology and kumbaya nonsense going on over yonder.
So the dreaded ditched lunch comes up. That everyone except Tamra forgot about.
Shannon and Tamra bicker, and they bicker and they bicker some more.
Five minutes left, so we have time to rat Tamra out for telling everyone she thinks Vicki got this stupid ring, and had it yanked back.
Vicki gets the same defensive screechy tone she used to get about Brooks.
She’s also kind of reminding me of when Shannon lost her shit that last season that she and John were together, that John was going to be SO MAD that they were talking about him, and he was going to dump her.
And we all know what type of guys Brooks and John were.
Vicki gets mad and snaps at everyone who dares to interject into the absent ring conversation.
Now for the moment we’ve all been waiting for!
Will the April birthday girls also be getting Dior bags??
Well, sort of. Shannon gets a bag and Vicki gets a wallet that she proceeds to of course complain about.
