Angie invites Mary over to talk about the trip. Angie seems really nerved out about being around her.
Mary seems to be taking all of this death of her only child business remarkably well.
It’s kind of off-putting if I’m being honest. She has herself convinced this is the path that he needed to take and it is what it is. That’s called not dealing with reality. And possibly guilt.
Angie tries to impress her with her 2013 Dom Perignon, but alas, Mary only drinks 2003, and refuses it.
Mary is one strange bird. I feel bad for what she’s going through and all, I really really do, but she is fucking weird.
Like who does she tink she is? She’s a fake pastor of a cult-like church, who married her grampa. Her sermons that they’ve shown, if you even want to call them that, are total gibberish and rambling about absolutely nothing because she has the intelligence of a fly.
Grandma’s death seems sketchy BY THE WAY.
Whatever.
Mary just wants the tea on the trip. That’s why she came. Angie first wants to make sure Mary likes her $4.99 TJ Maxx plates that she claims to have washed even though the price sticker is still completely intact. Watching her pour wine into a teapot, I will never be the same again.
Angie is very excited about her dishes, which I think is funny. I love cute dishes too. Especial vintage dishes. Mary doesn’t have time nor patience for cute dish nonsense, but does have the time and patience for Housewife nonsense. Got it. Why didn’t she just go if she’s that worried about it? She seems like she’s out of mourning.
I’m also getting annoyed with this sudden virtuous act of Mary’s. Enough already. She shouldn’t even be filming. It’s ridiculous.
She wants to host a lunch to scold everyone for fighting on the trip. Ohkayyyyy Maryyyyyyyyy the fucking cult leader, syphoning money from broke parishioners to buy designer clothes with. You are definitely the fucking morale police.
******
Britani hosts a birthday party for her daughter who she’s back in good graces with after ignoring her for seven years to chase men around.
Of course the Housewives are all in attendance.
Of course creepo Heather makes two inappropriate comments about a 21 year old girl in front of her mother. One about blow-jobs, and one about a threesome.
Heather is QUEEN of tasteless sexual comments to and about her OWN teenage/young adult daughters, so why would you be surprised she would also make them about someone ELSE’S daughter.
Bronwyn is still pretending she was the co-owner of Todd’s house when we all know she wasn’t.
I get the LLC thing, it’s a thing rich people do, which doesn’t 100% prove she didn’t own it with Todd, but given the way she’s acting, I don’t think she was part of the LLC, or had her name on the house.
That was smart of him. She doesn’t even know what the sales price was. Like when you sell your house you KNOW that number off the top of your fucking head. It can be easily looked up so it’s no secret. So the ‘nunya beeswax’ rationale doesn’t really apply. She doesn’t fucking know because she was not involved.
He might have thrown the money grubber a few dollars to shut her up even though he didn’t have to.
That’s probably why she made sure she was in town for the closing, to beg him for a cut. I’m sounding really bitchy, but I’m probably right.
She side steps Britani’s question as to whether or not she had to sign documents at closing. Then quickly changed the subject to her credit cards that he pays for her.
So just like Heather was trying to tell stupid Lisa and autistic Meredith last week, Todd IS still paying her credit cards, therefore funding her love life because that dude ain’t payin’ for shit.
Sounds like me with my ex-husband. You’re welcome you fucking Douche Lord two inch dick mother fucker. MY ‘extra’ income from working like a dog was used to he could go on trips, vacations and dates with ugly women. Fucking evil and fucking disgusting.
Brownwyn admits he looks at her statements to see what she’s up to. And she ‘just realized’ that? Okay Brownwyn.
She’s such a fucking liar.
She knows damned full well he can look at her statements if he’s the one paying the fucking bills. If they were her cards that she pays, why wouldn’t she change the password??
Why wouldn’t someone ask that? Heather?? Did you clock in for work or not? Maybe instead of making pervy jokes about Britanti’s daughter, pay attention and ask some intelligent questions. Thought you were the smart one?
******
Mary arrives for her luncheon she’s hosting to ‘bring everyone together’ or whatever.
The dress code is ‘dress like a boss’ but NO neckties.
Mary assesses all of the outfits as the ladies filter in.
You can tell Meredith feels weird around Bronwyn after their stupid little routine, especially without her master, Lisa to lean on. She keeps saying “there you go…” which is what people say when they don’t know what to say.
Of course there’s tension with Whitney and Quai because that’s the completely predictable shit that always happens on Housewives.
Mary does not approve of Quai’s outfit, and Angie went completely against the rules and wore a tie. With nothing underneath it. I guess she’s gearing up to be single.
Mary still hates Britani for no real reason whatsoever. She hasn’t acknowledged any of the flowers or condolences that she has sent her way,
What happened to Mary’s new outlook? Life’s too short to be petty and we are all sisters and must love one another. What happened to all of that? It doesn’t apply to Britani I guess, who really didn’t do anything to Mary, other than she’s just overall dumb and annoying.
She bitches about the flowers she gave her being ugly.
Mary is still the same shallow rude Mary that she’s always been, whilst pretending to be so polished and polite. Please.
Heather and Angie have a side convo where she encourages Angie to split up with Shawn.
Suddenly nasty mean sinister Robert Sr is “a sweetheart” and gave all of the ladies flower arrangements.
Okay. Someone else is tryin’ to rebrand. Dude. Just. Stop. Both of them need to stop actually.
Mary talks about no one supporting her when she got married, or when Robert Jr was born. Well that’s because they were all mad you married your grandmother’s husband and then proceeded to take over her church and turn it into a cult. Just a guess. Just a wild fucking guess.
Whitney was on WWHL this week with Britani, which was very awkward by the way. They were acting so overly ditzy even for them, and kept trying to make jokes that didn’t land. Whitney was being cryptic about Justin’s love life and kept saying “if you know, you know.” WWHL is not the place for ‘if you know, you know.’ You either spill it, or you shut up.
Andy was getting pissed and was like ‘what the fuck’ the entire time.
Anyway, what I was trying to say, is that Whitney IS drinking again. I was certain single Whitney did not want to be sober.
Why is this a new Housewife thing this season? When they’re splitting up from their husbands they tell one other bitch, and then keep bread crumbing and dropping hints.
Sai is doing that on RHONY too, and it’s flipping annoying. Like anyone is shocked when these bitches ditch their husbands. It’s a bigger shock if they don’t.
As if the ladies don’t already know and if they didn’t, can’t figure it out when they say “I have a lot going on…”
It’s so fucking dumb.
Whitney brings up the ‘hypocrisy and bullshit’ performance, and how disrespectfu; that was.
Meredith apologizes. I’m going to paraphrase but Lisa says ‘fuck off, I’m not apologizing for shit.’ SO on brand.
Meredith bitches at Whitney for some sort of ‘malignant’ scheme to take her down, that Quai, Whitney’s bestie, told her about. The ‘scheme’ which sounds more like a comment, was Whitney hoping Quai’s spot would replace Meredith.
Thought Whitney and Quai’s friendship was so special given they had the commonality of her bestie Sherri that passed away. I guess that doesn’t matter anymore when there’s Housewife drama to do.
They bicker about who said what about whom, and baiting and being recorded and OhmiGod, I don’t even care.
Not the toothbrush story again…
Mary gets on a soapbox and chastises the ladies, especially Lisa for not apologizing to Bronwyn, because that’s “just human kindness.”
I just don’t think Mary Cosby should be the one preaching ‘human kindness.’ Sorry girl, but I watched the TLC doc, and there were a lot of text messages and recordings of you, not exactly displaying ANY shred of human kindness whatsoever towards your churchgoers, or your staff.
Talk about hypocrisy and bullshit!!
When she says “we don’t move in live to hurt people because it just comes back…” I have to wonder, is she talking about herself?
Truer words may not have been ever spoken. Does she even realize what she said? If you don’t know what I’m talking about you NEED to watch that documentary that was on early this year. You could probably pull it up somewhere. It was EYE-OPENING. Mary seems to think no on watched it, and if we did, we forgot.
I’m tired of the overuse of the God thing with her. Enough already.
******
Quai and Whitney touch base about their little tiff. Quai is dying to be friends with Meredith for whatever reason, even though she knows she and Whitney are enemies, which is kind of weird, and not how a loyal long-standing friendship usually works. And who would want to be friends with Meredith? Like, why? is she fun, cool, great sense of humor? No, no and NO.
******
Mary, Angie Lisa and Heather meet for dinner. Britani’s in trouble for stealing the flowers from the lunch gathering.
Mary asked her about it and she admits to the theft, but claims she took them to nursing homes to give to the residents.
Angie has a theory which makes no sense. Poor Britani. I almost feel bad for her. She can never catch a break with these women. Angie thinks she’s trying to get old people to leave her money. I would say no one in a nursing home is exactly loaded.
Lisa’s lips look beyond ridiculous with this constant overlining she’s doing. Angie is right. It is some weird tick she’s got going on.
Angie gets asked about her marriage by Mary, and it’s clear she knows. Angie’s being weirdly secretive just like Whitney except she has a good reason: She doesn’t want to burden Mary with her problems at this time. Allegedly.
Mary seems more than happy to be burdened.
Heather is very brave for planning on introducing Tripp to these women.
Lisa is… lining her lips at the table… again.
Why are we still discussing whether or not Bronwyn’s name was on that house? We already know she spews lies and bullshit out of her mouth constantly. She’s one of those weird compulsive liars that tells lies just to tell lies.
She will still be getting a divorce settlement from the old geezer. They act like all the money Todd has was in the house. So stupid. This doesn’t even mean anything. What do these broads not understand about no prenup.
The fact that she’s flying round the globe with a hot young model boyfriend with Todd’s credit card is neither here not there. Are they really this dumb?
They think Brandon’s not really her boyfriend. They’re kind of right.
It seems she is using him to dangle in front of Todd as a pay-back of some sort for his indiscretions.
