What happens in Vegas… we will all be watching. And getting bored and annoyed.
At first I wasn’t sure if they were going to the actual Grand Canyon or some Vegas Grand Canyon themed area. But no they’re taking the four hour trek to the real thing.
Now Jenn’s mad again about the room change, when she seemed to be fine with it the night before at dinner.
Bravo has GOT to stop with all of this room drama every time there’s a trip.
They HAVE to let it go.
I like how they mixed it up a little though. Shannon’s allegedly not mad that it’s a smaller room or not bougie enough.
She’s mad it’s close to the elevators and there are poisonous electrodes in the air. Or something like that.
This has always been a thing with Shannon so I guess maybe she could truly feel like she’s going to be infused with cancer-causing sparks by sleeping near the elevator??
Shannon gets Vicki a scooter than rams into her bad knee with it. That’s great Shannon.
(shannon run over vickie 1 2) resave 2
There’s a purse/bag argument and believe it or not, it’s not the gold Dior bag.
It’s the green Valentino bag.
I guess these bitches can’t get their purses at TJ Maxx like a normal fucking person.
Tamra’s jeans are strange. I got a pair something like that earlier this year, now I’m second guessing them. Mine aren’t cropped like that. I think that’s what’s making them look odd. The look like Genie pants
Moving on from my fashion police moment, Vicki is overall annoyed with Carmella’s existence. Which of course is on brand for her.
Carmella shares that her daughter is sick which segues into how she and her ex never got divorced because they’re “in business together.” However, not sure what ‘business’ we’re talking about.
Her convo with Gina and Shannon in the van on the way to The Canyon with Vicki pretending to work of course and seemingly not paying attention, is performative. She wants Vicki to ‘overhear’ and be impressed. I hate when people do that shit. Like if you want me to know something, say it directly to me
You can totally see the wheels spinning like crazy in Vicki’s head. She looks like she’s ready to explode listening to this broad talk about her life pretending she’s not listening and judging.
Carmella is in business with her ex doing what exactly?? She claims she “manages a portfolio” and this is why they never got a divorce.
Hate to say I do see what Vicki is seeing. She’s kind of all over the place about her life, and sometimes she doesn’t make sense. She seems desperate to impress.
And she ‘quit her job’ to raise their kids. What job exactly? Being a Playboy Bunny?? I can’t. I like Carmella, but this convo is so very ***performative**** for Vicki.
I would HOPE you would quit your ‘job’ as a centerfold model when you have children. MY GOD. I’m surprised Vicki keeps quiet. But I guess she was saving it up for later.
I don’t think Carmella is a bad mom at all, as Vicki accused her which was horrible, I just think she’s a little out there.
I also feel like every time she references dumping her husband when her kids were 3,4,5 and 6, she wants some sort of reaction that her four kids are all a year apart. I’m actually impressed by that. I sure as hell couldn’t do that.
Gina questions why she’s concerned with Danny The Weird Talking Cheater taking care of her sick teenage daughter.
I get Carmella’s concern. He absolutely does not strike me as any sort of empathetic or nurturing person.
Gina, Danny is not Travis, okay? Not everyone has a Travis. Travis is basically a woman with a penis (assuming he has one.)
In the other van Tamra starts harping on Jenn about what ‘business’ Carmella plans on doing with her.
Again – not to beat a dead horse but it’s probably assistant type work. Jenn says she has no idea what she’s having her do, because she doesn’t have a Real Estate or ‘Developer’ license.
She thinks you need to be an interior designer or have a developer’s license (whatever that is) to help redecorate a flip. I can’t with this woman.
She can’t just be like ‘I’m going to help out and learn what she does. I’m excited. Back off.’ Her coming off so confused is giving total ditzball.
Dumb Emily said it’s like “putting the cart before the horse” since their friendship is somewhat new.
Shut up Emily. You all wanted SO BADLY for her to have an income. Here she is trying something, and you bitches wanna shit all over it.
Is it me that’s an idiot or is it these women? Cuz I don’t think it’s me.
Yeah it is a bad idea to mix business, money and friendship, but if it goes south then oh well. Let them figure it out. Jesus. You don’t know until you try.
Jenn wanted to know who ‘found’ the Grand Canyon. It would’ve been funny for them all to say Columbus, and see if she believed them.
She would have.
You know I’ve been to Arizona twice but never to the Grand Canyon. That’s pretty embarrassing.
Why go through the expense and hassle of traveling, when you can just watch Housewives??
Tamra thinks if she name-drops ‘God’ that makes her spiritual and holy.
Her random religious outbursts every now and then are cringy. Maybe she was referencing the song. It’s not ‘like’ God’s Country though.
Last season she and Jo were ‘praying’ in the car on the way to a party. Although there often is a need to pray on the way to a Housewife event, they looked ridiculous.
Remember when she decided she was going to be a Bible thumper? Then forgot all about it by next season.
There are some Canyon activities planned, other than looking at it and listening to Tamra ramble about God.
Ziplining is an option of course. What’s a Housewife trip without zip lining? (that’s going to end badly one of these days, I swear.) Along with an educational experience. They pretend to choose when you know it was already assigned who would go where. But whatever.
During this conversation Emily does not stop flipping and fluffing her extensions.
I also noticed that she’s constantly looking down at her body. Yes Emily you’re skinny. That’s what happens when your body is tricked into believing you’re not hungry, so you only eat two bites of something ever day.
You don’t eat, you lose weight? Who knew? I predict she tries to get off of that crap and puts it ALL back on.
Hey maybe on the ‘cultural’ activity we’ll find who first stumbled upon the Grand Canyon. Maybe it was God, Tamra.
God found it, and let everyone know. And told them to build a glass walkway over it, and a gift shop. You always need a gift shop. Duh.
Vickie and Shannon end up chickening out of the zip lining.
I don’t blame them.
There’s literally these rickety wooden stairs and a platform leading to what appears to be a clothesline over the Grand Canyon that you’re going to suspend from and slide across, and assume that all of these components are in perfect working order.
Not to mention, you’re trusting that some random guy knows exactly what he’s doing as he puts this harness gear on you, that’s the difference between life and death.
The cultural experience is a bit more low-key. I don’t know what the hell Tamra has on, but she looks like she raided Sophia’s closet. I do approve of Gina’s outfit. What a strange twist of events.
As they enjoy the sun setting view of the GC, Tamra reflects on how much she’s changed. Again.
Emily encourages Jenn to confront Shannon about her room tantrum. She and Vickie approach still wearing their zip line gear for some reason.
I guess she’s doing it right now. I thought she meant later, you know at dinner. The appropriate time for people to bitch at you: When you’re trying to eat.
Emily tried to get her all cranked up, but she’s delivers her fake grievance pretty delicately.
Shannon basically shoots it all down and says she was really pissed how Heather assigned rooms everyone was taking, and that’s what pissed her off.
So the elevator poison thing WAS a bunch of crap?
Well that went relatively smooth. I’m sure Emily is disappointed.
Now they have a four hour drive back to Sin City.
******
Shannon confronts Heather.
I don’t even know how to describe how that went. It was just so ??? I don’t even know. Stupid is all that I coming to mind right now.
When in Vegas, you gamble. They hit Blackjack and Roulette.
Jenn asks Carmella about this ‘job’ she got offered.
Doesn’t it seem like they’re really stretching these ‘story lines?’ Or more like beating the living shit out of them.
It’s time to shit or get off the pot with this. Is she hiring her or not?
Stop talking it to death and let’s fucking do it.
Carmella questions the seemingly non supportiveness of other women (that may not be an official word but I don’t care – you can both suck it! What are YOU doing? Sitting there stalking and creeping and being miserable hateful useless LOSERS living off of women)
I don’t think the 20 grand is for a whole year as Tamra tried to say in the van. It’s a cut from one transaction, which I assume would take 2 -3 months. Tamra the former ‘Realtor’ should know this.
And to answer your questions, Carmella my dear, NO they do NOT support each other. Did you WATCH the season of Jenn when the ex stopped paying her living expenses?
It was brutal. And who was the worst? Fucking gross married-a-man-for-his-inheritance Emily Simpson. The most miserable Housewife of all time.
Yes, of ALL time. I hate to tell her this, but she looks better a little curvier since that’s her natural body shape. She looks unnatural and like a bobble head. Like get off of that shit that’s eating away at your bone mass little by little and eat your fucking tacos.
Gina tries to defend that they DO actually support each other.
Oh Gina. Just sit this one out. You were second meanest to Jenn, acting like she ruined your pretend real estate gig when she couldn’t pay her rent in the house you helped her get. Actually that’s part of YOUR JOB GINA, to put her in a rental she can afford. Did you ask about her income and if she’s sure what’s-his-head would continue to pay it?
Jenn cheated on Will. Seriously, we all thought he was going to keep paying her astronomical Orange County rent?
Didn’t Gina sit in a coffee shop wearing a ridiculous hat screaming at her about it? But you support each other? Okayyyyyy Gina. The delusion is real with these bitches.
This attempt to get Carmella defensive and rattled continues.
As expected, this would be either an Emily or Vicki thing to go this low, Vicki starts drilling her.
Now it’s her living and parenting situation, since her kids go to school in San Diego and she technically lives in Orange County. I have to admit it all sounds strange. Why can’t she do Real Estate in San Diego? Is Vicki trying to insinuate that she has a house in OC just for the show? We’ve never been down THAT road with Housewives before.
‘They’ say when someone is trying to get a rise out of you, getting defensive is the WORST thing that you can do. That gives them the upper hand.
As soon as your voice starts going up twenty octaves, and you’re desperately defending yourself, the instigator/abuser or whomever, isn’t even listening to what you’re saying since they has accomplished their mission. You’re upset and that’s what they wanted.
Carmella is giving Amanda from Beverly Hills. Last season when everyone kept trying to get her all bent out of shape, she stayed calm. It makes the troublemaker like SO MAD. So they just give up. Which Vicki eventually does and wheels away after the others get involved and tell her to knock it off.
Carmella matter of factly just tells Vicki to suck it and she knows that she’s a good mom.
******
Jenn and Gina check on Carmella in the morning. She expresses confusion as to Vicki’s accusations. She thought Vicki ‘respected the hustle.’
Which she does, but also thinks Carmella’s whole family dynamic is off.
Gina had a point that if Vicki had all of these questions, they spent FOUR HOURS each way going back and forth to the Grand Canyon.
Instead she pretended to work, but was listening and cataloging everything Carmella was saying to use it against her later.
Tamra separately pretends to scold Vicki.
Vicki says it looks like she’s ‘buying her way in’ with the designer purse for Emily, and the offering of 20 grand for Jenn (while not being completely clear as to what work will be requested.)
Although with the multitude of conversations about it, that could have been asked by now.
Vickie’s reasoning for attacking Carmella is she doesn’t trust what people tell her since the Brooks debacle. She doesn’t say Brooks specifically, but she says ‘boyfriends.’
I think she would have acted like this regardless. She hates on the new girls. This si probably why they brought her back this season.
Heather has arranged a scavenger hunt. I hate the Housewife games so much.
The ‘hunt’ seems more like assignments.
Tamra is committed to these ultra-trendy baggy/barrel jeans that just are not doing her any favors.
There is a happy medium between the skinny jeans and these.
So everyone is feverishly trying to complete the assignments on their lists, such as eating and drinking certain things, making a stranger laugh, doing a model walk…
Heather was right; they’re too busy to argue.
Dinner at Nobu’s. Tamra tries to order a red wine blend at a bar.
Vickie apologizes to Carmella since she was nagged and ordered to do so. Maybe she feels bad, but probably not. She admits in her yap it was a ‘peer pressure’ apology, even though she’s telling Carmella she had some type of epiphany when she came back to her room.
Carmella accepts it just to move on.
I feel like she gives this Danny weirdo dude way too much credit for doing the most minimal tasks.
Helping out with her TEENAGE kids while she’s away for two days isn’t really that impressive given how long they’ve been together. And how hard is it to cook a fucking steak?
I feel like he’s manipulative and doing all of this so that she forgets about his cheating. Because you know he’s “not even CLOSE to the person who did those things.” Whatever the FUUUUCK that means. People don’t change their entire personas you numb skull. You are still the exact person who did those things, and I believe with every fiber in my being you will do them again.
Emily shares some rather concerning contention between her and Shane. Like their marriage sounds BAD.
She tells Carmella they were at a point where they didn’t speak for WEEKS.
Weeks??
What was she so pissed and resentful about? She didn’t share that part. Gina kind of looks at her like she didn’t realize things were that bad.
Heather talks about planning and scheduling sex with Terry as she’s giving advice to the others.
I do NOT want to picture that.
They encourage Shannon to go on some dates.
Thank you Bravo, for not making them argue about the same dumb shit tonight.
The purse, the rooms, the job offer…
Finally, someone listens to me! We don’t need fighting at every single dinner or get-together.
