Lindsay is so funny how they have her pretending to give a hoot about Lexi and her drama with Jesse. Do you think the real non-pregnant Lindsay would give any fucks about this girl?
On the contrary I believe she’d most likely be mean girling the shit out of her. Single Lindsay probably wold have decided she liked Jesse because Lexi did.
Am I the only one that sees that Jesse is playing the exact identical game with Lexi that West did with Ciara last summer?
And if you caught WWHL Thursday night, Lexi divulged that Jesse shared with her that West has actually SAID that he purposely pretended to like Ciara for the ‘story line’ purpose. So, you know, do the math.
Based on the previous weekend no one expected these two ‘lovebirds’ to arrive together, and in good spirits, but lo and behold here they are. That’s how a toxic relationship works. The high’s are high, and the low’s are low. There is no happy medium. There’s no happy anything. As I know.
Lexi claims they talked ‘for hour and hours’ about everything. That sounds exhausting.
So in other words SHE talked for hours and hours telling him everything he needed to change about himself and he pretended to listen and care.
I have a question. Why are they all sitting inside the house??
Summer is for BEING OUTSIDE.
Kyle has his very dramatic phone call he must make in regards to his sperm issue.
You would think Amanda would accompany him when he goes to their room to call the doctor. Whatever, this is probably all made up anyway. And can we not talk about Kyle’s sperm, like EVER again?
I kind of like how she’s a nonchalant wife. Kyle knew this going in, just as she knew he was the party boy.
Jesse and Lexi talk about their reconciliation and Jesse admits his communication should be better with her. I honestly don’t see that ‘communication’ is their problem. The issue is that he’s a douche.
Ciara makes this about her, and asks him in a condescending way “so you’re not a liar and you’re not two-faced?”
You know it’s kind of awkward to see your guy bickering and beefing with another girl, because that usually means there’s some sort of tension or ‘feelings’ involved. Ciara knows this, and doesn’t care. She could stop arguing with him in front of Lexi.
We’re used to her being boring. Go back to being boring. This is giving trying too hard.
Kyle comes back from his call with the doctor and announces his semen is fine and ready to go. Amanda sits there making weird faces, and laughing. Poor Kyle wanted some acknowledgment and huggies and kissies for his spermies being so plentiful. Amanda doesn’t seem to care about much anymore. Must be the magic of the meds.
The guys convene outside and Carl shares that he has signed a seven-year 10g/mo lease for his ‘Soft Bar.’
Around $600,000 is needed for renos.
Jesse makes a snarky comment about having to sell a lot of drinks to make up $600g. They both look scared shitless for him.
Lexi talks to Lindsay and Ciara about her Jesse issues and how they patched things up.
When Ciara enters the chat with her dirty, you can see her immediate annoyance that Lexi is in the room. I guess that is awkward when you’ve been extremely flirty with someone’s boyfriend (and trying to deny it.)
You can see Ciara looking kind of guilty. Yes, he was the aggressor of the flirtiness, but she was also very receptive to it. Lexi does very overcompensating smiling and laughing since she is feeling uncomfortable too.
It’s obvious Ciara is into this guy, or at least into the attention that he had been giving her.
It’s so cute how Ciara seriously think Jesse gives two fucks about her. It’s sad, but cute.
He totally objectifies her, uses her, and treats her like a sex object, but she can’t see that.
Not unlike what he’s doing with Lexi.
Lexi sells how their ‘relationship’ is worth pursuing and trying to save because she actually thinks she can ‘train’ him. She rambles about ‘boundaries’ and communication. The new buzz words.
Silly silly girl.
Lindsay looks at Ciara like ‘this girl is fucking delusional.’ Not that she has room to talk but, here we are. Suddenly Lindsay is knocked up, in a pretend relationship and the sensible one.
Ciara goes on a tangent of insults about him to Lexi, while she’s sipping this dirty martini, which is so awkward, immature and not cool. He’s touchy about his weight? Where did that come from, and why is that relevant? She’s clearly trying to let Lexi know they have more than this ‘brother/sister’ (which is hilarious by the way) relationship and she thinks she knows him better than she does.
She knows Lexi isn’t the type to tell her to shut the fuck up. It’s weird to be getting that passionate about a guy someone else is seeing TO his girlfriend. And of course she says nothing.
She just looks at her like she wants to slap her upside the head.
To be fair to Ciara, Jesse did say some douchey things to her. I’m not going to deny that. But Ciara is still annoying AF. Both can be true. But I think she’s not the total victim here.
Meanwhile Jesse is outside talking to the guys trying to sell us how much he likes Lexi, and this is the first girl he’s been into in a long time.
What he’s doing here is classic triangulation. He’s pitting these two girls against each other, so he feels like he’s being ‘fought’ for. Fucking sicko. And he’s even using the same chick West used last year. I mean I guess he didn’t have a lot of options, with Amanda being married, Paige being with Craig, and Bailee getting canned. Can’t see him going for Gabby. She’s never around anyway. He has no fucking shame.
They flash on a prom pic and why are we not talking more about this?? Not exactly someone that looks like he was a ‘cool kid’ just saying. Poor guy had his heart broke at 18, so now he’s on this quest to use and talk down to women. Nice.
West using the anniversary of his friend from college passing away as a story line, and to get sympathy from Ciara is such an all-time low, I cannot even fucking find the proper words for this fucking waste of space.
They go out to dinner in separate groups so they all talk about each other of course. They even split up the couples which I think is pretty odd, but whatever.
I notice Imrul is missing for the second week in a row, and this time he doesn’t even get mentioned. I feel like he got a ‘quiet firing?’ Like I’m sorry, but the excessive hooking up with strangers he just met was getting borderline brothel-like.
Kyle is in such good spirits this season. I think he only cried like once.
Lindsay actually wore a shirt covering her stomach and I am in shock. Ciara, no.
Paige saying she loves ‘Kraft Singles’ seals the deal with me that she’s trash. That shit isn’t even cheese. I rejoiced the day I could stop buying fucking Velveeta slices, which are the same thing, probably worse if possible.
Amanda talks in her yap about what I brought up previously, about her most likely having postpartum depression and leaving Kyle to do all of the work while she lies in bed all day. It is good seeing her happy and the two of them not wanting to kill each other.
Lexi asks West about his friend since of course he made an IG ‘story’ out of it.
It was funny that no one asks Carl for his advice or take when he just lost his brother not that long ago.
I guess Ciara needs to make this about her, and show that she feels a certain type of way over it since they were ‘together’ or when West was pretending to like her, the previous summer when it happened. She storms away form the table because this is about her, you know. It’s always about her. Also what does she have against clothing?
This whole ‘I have such high morals. and I’m so virtuous’ thing she tries to sell while dressed like a hooker is getting old and tired.
“I literalllly just graaaaaaaabed a hot curlinggggggg ironnnnnnn.”
It’s funny how Paige has no hesitation in throwing Ciara under the bus, quickly pointing out she left it on.
Ciara just laughs when Paige tells her she burnt her hand on it, not realizing or not caring, not sure which, that it was her fault.
The fact that Paige grabbed it tells you she left it somewhere that it needed to be moved AND left it on. Whatever, I’m sure she’ll live. It’s just funny how Ciara is just so fucking oblivious. No wonder she was only a nurse for a milisecond. I would be nervous it that ding dong was my nurse, I’m just saying.
So it’s pool day until they leave for the beach dinner (tough life.) The boys, and Paige convene and immediately start discussing this Lexi and Jesse debacle.
Can you even fathom what these week-long series of ‘talks’ might have been like with her trying to tell him everything he does wrong and how he pretended to receive it and be better?
Then the mom and sister show up to also tell him how bad he sucks, which is kind of funny. Who wanted to be a fly on THAT wall?
West proceeds to announce how weird it was that Jesse was grinding on her all night when they went out in front of her mom. It is strange, but Lexi is 26 not 16. So let’s say the mom is weird, but not Jesse for doing it. Or Lexi for not telling him to knock it off.
Jesse could have tried to be respectful since her mom was there, but I guess that’s something he’s incapable of doing. Somehow this is the mom’s fault. So typical.
Jesse is like tough titties, she wanted to be there. She even hung out until 2am, AND went out afterwards to see her ‘friend’ DJ. Now that’s a trooper. Dad wasn’t around. Is something else going here? I don’t know.
He starts to sort of gossip about her and justifies that he’s just stating facts. She was at ‘The Box’ until 3am he shares, in a very judgy way.
I looked that place up and I find it strange that:
a. a married woman would be there without her husband, and
b. she would go there with her daughter.
Why is he sitting here gossiping about his girlfriend’s mom though? Because he’s a piece of shit, that’s why.
I wish West would pipe down. “It’s not normal and weird” as far as the ‘therapy session’ with her mom and sister.
He’s clearly just pissed that he doesn’t get to sleep with his boyfriend every weekend.
I think Paige is afraid to admit she hates sharing a room with Ciara because she’s such a fucking slob. I don’t get how she manages to slob up that room so badly in 24 hours.
They get ready to leave for the beach.
Jesse enters Amanda’s room with Paige to gossip, grovel and gripe. He seems to manage somehow to do all three simultaneously.
He expresses regret about what he said to Ciara, that West called dibs and all of that fucking dumbassery.
He doubles down on his claim that he was ‘joking.’
Amanda reminds him that he also said the same shit to her and Craig. He tries to deny it as they roll it.
He seems disappointed that Ciara ‘didn’t think they were hooking up thatnight.’ What a dumb question to ask.
Why are Paige and Amanda all giggly over this, as if it’s cute? How would they like it if it was their dude acting like this? Why do they seem so fucking obsessed with this
Amanda reminds him that he also said the same shit to her and Craig. He tries to deny it as they roll it.
He seems disappointed that Ciara ‘didn’t think they were hooking up thatnight.’ What a dumb question to ask.
Why are Paige and Amanda all giggly over this, as if it’s cute? How would they like it if it was their dude acting like this? Why do they seem so fucking obsessed with this Grover Weirdo?? Because he tells them they’re hot constantly? That’s all it takes for this dumb asses? Are we this insecure and starved for male attention? The dude DOES know what to say, but how fucking hard is that to flatter a chick?
Amanda advises him to have a ‘transparent conversation with her.’ Can we soon stop saying ‘transparent?’
Lindsay all worried about who Carl is hooking up with, and she wants ‘proof.’ Euww.
She refers to her pregnant stomach as a ‘receipt’ to prove SHE is hooking up. Could this woman be any more immature? I’m sure Gemma is going to be so proud to see this one day. Her mom referring to her unborn child to fucking gloat that she’s doing better than her ex in the bedroom department. I can’t with this chick. She is a fucking oddball and a half. It’s not really a flex for a woman to say she could get laid, now is it?? Guys will fuck anything. Ask my ex-husband.
Kyle whines that Amanda ignored him all day and didn’t get excited about his clean bill sperm health from the doctor.
What else is new Kyle? She always ignores you. Stop being such a baby. Why is it men call women high maintenance? If this isn’t high maintenance, I don’t know what the hell is.
He wanted some accolades for his “sperm being dope.”
Paige compares Kyle to Craig, and I would say that’s a fair assessment. They’re both pretty moody and need to be told they’re killing it every five minutes.
And it’s funny how they are/were with ladies that could not give two fucks about slobbering all over them.
Jesse demands to talk to Ciara – alone. Lexi immediately looks miffed.
Jesse delivers this sincere-sounding apology to Ciara. You can already tell she’s going to be NOT having it. She’s of course milking this shit.
I do like her, “usually when it’s a joke, people laugh” comment as he tries to say he was ‘joking’ at the Cancer Society lunch.
I think he tried to make a funny out of the arm-touching, and his delivery was way off. Or maybe you’re just not funny, Jesse.
“I’m kind of over you guys” she tells him, meaning him and Lexi I assume. I don’t know what she’s so mad about. She was the one being all super extra receptive to his aggressive flirting when she knows he has a girlfriend.
She hated this so bad when the tables were turned a few years back, when she was into stupid Austen, and Lindsay was trying to take over.
I don’t think Ciara was being aggressive like Lindsay was because Lindsay is a fucking ho, but still kind of the same situation.
Seeing recent social media posts of Jesse and Ciara, they look kind of hot and heavy. I think they’re together.
Of course he’s using her like he did with Lexi. Duh.
Especially based on her weird stoned ass behavior on WWHL a few weeks ago.
