UGH Sorry missed recapping the past TWO episodes with SLC and NYC starting.
That whole thing with Vicki and the ‘desert house’ was just so ridiculous.
Shannon later tries to defend Vicki by saying, yeah she just blurts shit out, then ya get a half-ass disingenuous apology, and she wants it all forgotten.
That being said, after she apologized for calling Jenn ‘low-hanging fruit’ (aka an easy target) Emily didn’t need to start in on her working in the car and asking them to be quiet when she was using the mic on her phone to send emails. Emily referring to someone as rude is fucking hilarious, in a massively hypocritical way.
Cannon-mouth Emily who relentlessly bullied Jenn and Katie around for the past, what, three seasons?? But Vicki’s rude for asking them to be quiet? Some women work for a living, lazy spoiled entitled Emily Simpson.
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Heather, such a strange bird. And I didn’t mean that to make fun of her for being shaped like a chicken (I was rolling when her mom called her that.)
So let me get this straight. Instead of having an actual house when living in beautiful sunny So Cal, not NYC, she wants to be holed up in a stupid apartment. And what’s the purpose of having the the two, exactly??
It’s so fucking dumb. I cracked up when she said “I talked to Terry and the kids, and we all agreed we’re done with houses.”
No Heather, YOU agreed you’re ‘done with houses’ and nobody argued. Your family is sick of this nomad life of living in various apartments. They all think it’s so stupid, but no one will say it.
This apartment while huge, is basically one ginormous room. Off topic, but why does Heather insist on standing and walking like she has a literal stick up her ass?
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Again Emily shoves poor little Luke under the bus complaining she lost a year spending time with Annabelle (I think that’s a really dumb name, like of all the girl’s names) because Luke was being such a pain in the ass. She doesn’t say that, but it definitely comes across that way to me. She NEEDS to stop with this.
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Carmella complains about Vicki with her kids. They thought she was super-weird at her party going on and on about Chicago hot dogs, as if they give a shit.
Yes we know they put all kinds of weird stuff on their hot dogs. So what. I feel like she was trying to come off as cool to the three teens, but failed miserably.
Vicki saying she didn’t have TV’s, when we’re literally looking at a TV on the wall.
She’s always mean to the new girls. Always. It’s getting old. Like Vicki.
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This ‘poor broke Shannon’ story line is getting tiresome. The bitch ain’t broke. Even if she’s frivolous with her money, her parents are loaded. End of discussion.
She’s still having the luau, so Gina you’re just a dumb ass.
And who are you to talk? Like you dumped Travis two years ago because he was a broke-ass, but now suddenly he’s buying you a $50,000 ring? That doesn’t sound very financially responsible.
Also, one last thing. Bravo pays for part of, if not all of the parties and events they throw. And by the way, and this is really the last thing about Shannon’s finances, it’s a tax write-off! Shut up Gina with your Jersey (yes Jersey!) accent and 2005 high school twang!
Gina starts yammering about the ‘expense of a wedding.’ No big elaborate show is needed for two second marriages. Go to Vegas and be done with it. Because YOU’RE so financially responsible. Also she keeps talking about buying a bigger house, when the house they have now seems quite large. She REALLY needs to shut it. And if she didn’t keep that townhouse as an investment property, that’s also pretty stupid, and not financially savvy.
Also I thought Travis ordered that they not even discuss a wedding nor getting married for six fucking months, so why are we even talking about it?
Oh because she wants an aired wedding special, clearly.
They discuss their overnight trip, and Vicki’s inability to interact with humans like a normal fucking person.
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Okay, so let’s dive into this Tamra family scene.
I have noticed Tamra never mentions her only grandchild since she’s been back on, and I was hoping it didn’t mean she wasn’t involved in her life, but that’s exactly what it seems like it means.
She and Ryan had an argument about social media posts (he’s a Republican – how dare he?) where Tamra thought he was getting involved in ‘hate rhetoric’ which he may or may not have been doing, I don’t agree with that either. Perhaps it was just views Tamra disagreed with.
Since they were arguing about that, Ryan brings up his disappointment in her that she isn’t really an involved grandparent in his daughter’s life. I feel like he had been keeping that bottled up.
Tamra, in MY opinion, is twisting his words. I don’t think Ryan is dumb enough to think she should be an all-day babysitter and knitting sweaters. He was hoping she would have an interest in establishing a relationship with her. They live nearby I’m assuming. There’s really no excuse.
She hasn’t tried. The ball’s in her court as the adult. She shouldn’t expect Ava, a child to reach out to her, like she said during the purse interaction.
Ryan still doesn’t seem too happy with her as he mutters under his breath walking in, even though he said she was ‘right’ and they made up. Allegedly. He remarks how “Grandma will be happy to see you” as they enter the house which sounded very sarcastic.
Another reason why I know she’s not close with her. She would’ve given herself a cute little nickname like younger hip Grandma’s are doing now. Not just be ‘Grandma.’ She could’ve done something cute with ‘Tamra’ and ‘Grandma.’ ‘TamGram!!’
Sarah, the ex, is in attendance, which I thought was strange since they haven’t been together in years, but I’m assuming she wanted to supervise the filming. Still, she could’ve been behind the scenes. Seems like she wanted to be on TV. She seems like kind of a ham. That hair is a giveaway that I guess she thinks looks good. She was looking down at herself as they were walking into the house. Emily does that too. What’s up with that? Maybe she just lost a lot of weight too. is that what women do when they lose weight?
People are saying Tamra and Sarah are close, but I’m kind of doubting that. When she hugs Sarah, she wasn’t very receptive. But if it is true, that makes it even more shitty she’s not spending time with her granddaughter. If she and Ryan are having a tiff, it shouldn’t matter.
Ava seems to have a better banter with Tamra’s mom, her great-grandmother.
Sarah and her daughter are looking judgy and irritated as they enter. I have a feeling it’s because of this whole display that Tamra is putting on for the cameras.
Tamra attempts to hug Ava whilst singing ‘Happy Birthday’ and it’s one of the most awkward scenes I’ve seen in a while on Bravo.
This child clearly barely knows Tamra, and pulls away immediately while having a really confused face as to why this is even taking place to begin with. The hug ends before it even gets started.
So much worse than when Kyle kept trying to hug Mauricio on Beverly Hills after they separated. He was like ‘lady get out my face.’ Exactly what Ava looked like. She might have been forewarned about this.
So after all of the initial arrival awkwardness, everyone seems more at ease and talking about tattoos and Sophia’s new boyfriend.
That cake looks a little sad to me.
Seriously Tamra? This was your best? And is that even enough for everyone?
Whatever. I’m not judging.
Then it takes an awkward turn again when Tamra summons Ava to go to a separate room for her gift. After the hug didn’t go well, she should’ve just left it go.
Her daughter Sydney HATES to be brought up on the show. I think that’s what even started this whole estrangement, yet she does it year after year after year.
She stops with Ava in the hallway showing her a huge massive photo on the wall of Tamra, Eddie and her four kids, (has Ava never been here before?) and points out her Aunt Sydney and whines about her family dynamics to an eleven-year-old. I noticed she didn’t even mention Spencer, her other son, so that was weird. I did hear a few years ago he doesn’t talk to her either.
Ava is looking at her like she’s nuts. Tamra’s in her own world. I didn’t realize Sydney didn’t speak to ANYONE. Wonder what her deal is, for real. I wonder if Simon perpetuates this.
Tamra gives Ava a vintage mid 2000’s Gucci purse from her closet, and tells her it’s a tradition that she wants to start – giving her an old designer purse of hers for her birthday every year to start ‘her own collection.’
I GUESS you can see how that’s a cute idea.
It’s a basic Gucci purse, but that style IS in again (I have a feeling mom and the sisters are going to be scooping this up, and Ava will never see it.) But at the same time she could’ve done better and put in some effort. It’s not even in a gift bag or anything, and why not fill it with candy and a gift card, lip balms… I mean come ON woman, you’re not that fucking busy. Pretend she’s a Housewife you’re tryin’ to impress.
Tamra apologizes that she’s not around much, because she’s ‘always working’ and tells her she’s here if she needs her. That sounds like such a bullshit excuse.
Ava assures her “that’s okay.” Yes I’m sure it is Ava. We believe you. What else was she supposed to say? I’m sure it’s hurtful.
As they rejoin everyone in the kitchen, Sarah seems to have loosened up. Ava seems to like the Gucci!! Hopefully the mom and sisters won’t confiscate it!
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Vicki Shannon and her daughter go bra-shopping for Shannon. This was a filler scene. I didn’t need to hear that much about Shannon’s boobs.
What I found humorous about this is that Vicki’s so worried about her money-spending habits, but was encouraging her to spend probably $500 on bras at this bougie boutique.
Vicki scowls at Shannon and Sophie that they get to go to lunch, and she has to go back to work. She always does that shit, acts like she’s the only one in the universe who works. Sophie tells her to shut it, she’s on PTO. Vicki brags she owns her business so doesn’t get PTO. Well Vicki, you can take off anytime you want. So it’s actually better.
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They’re all on the way to the luau.
I thought it was so brutal they put Tama and Vickie in the front seats, with poor Eddie in the way way back. Come on, they could have had him seated beside Tamra and she could’ve turned her ass around to talk. Vicki probably refused to sit in the back.
Vicki seriously thinks Jenn and Emily should be apologizing to her.
Vicki is the main subject at the party, between the sleep over party debacle and the shit she’s saying about Carmella.
Heather and Emily have an excruciating conversation that I don’t even want to go into. Neither one of these bitches care if the other lives or dies.
Carmella is talking loudly at the table, for Vicki to overhear, and bitching about her rude comments.
It quickly gets officially addressed. All of the guys exit the table simultaneously. I don’t think I’ve ever actually even seen that before.
It’s like it was Bravo orders. Usually they stick around, and are are privy to the mess. Especially when the whole thing kind of involved Danny. And Terry LIVES for this shit.
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Shannon rats out Vicki, because she really needs to be Switzerland, for her comment that this stupid Danny guy is ‘raising Carmella’s kids.’
No. The way she was fawning all over him and kissing his ass when he was helping with her sick teenager for two days? Clearly he doesn’t do that much.
Wonder if he has kids. She mentioned last week that he’s “been married a few times.” So that could be two or even three. If you saw on WWHL a few weeks ago, they are officially done. She apparently busted him cheating again. What the hell? Thought he was ‘nowhere near the person who did those things.’ Or whatever the hell he said, that made ZERO sense, and I knew right then and there he was still cheating. That’s like a lot of words.
Vicki lies and claims she never said it. “Rewind the tape” she says. They do, and she did.
Carmella is pissed. I think she has a hard time standing up to Vicki, but she is.
Vicki’s doing her standby defense this season, claiming she ‘didn’t say that to hurt your feelings, and she would NEVER want you to feel bad.’
MKAY Vicki.
Carmella right away addresses that’s the worst thing you could say about a mom.
Vicki doesn’t seem to have a comeback.
Mother of the Year Emily, interjects telling her that an apology is in order. Oh okay Hypocrite.
Carmella is not interested in another fake apology and goes on to address the other shit Vicki said – that her house didn’t look lived-in, and all of that crap.
I do have to say about that house, it’s gorgeous and I know four kids and all, but do they really need that grand of a house as a rental? I’m still flabbergasted no one is making fun of a Realtor for renting.
Did you see the aerials of that house? It’s beyond. I mean Vicki, there could be TV’s in other parts of the house. Did you examine all 50,000 SF of this palace?
Oh wait she probably did.
I have to agree, she could step up on the decorating, but again it’s a rental and temporary home.
So ANYWAY Carmella quotes her comments about no TV’s and no food.
Vicki defends herself in her yap, that the others saw red flags and things that didn’t add up too. Yeah they made comments but she fights so DIRTY.
That’s different from saying she’s a total liar and a bad mom.
Jenn shut up. Just shut up. She tries to defend Vicki’s picking on the new girl and makes it seem like it’s fine.
Carmella, says to Vickie, and I loved this, “you’re new too.”
Vicki hates that! She claims she “started the franchise.”
Was it YOUR idea? Yeah I don’t think so. That ‘credit’ belongs to, and no not Andy, but a Mr. Scott Dunlop. So we have him to blame that our brains are rotted.
Then the comment heard around the world.
“Everything has an expiration.” That was really quick of Carmella. I was impressed.
She’s like so right. Yeah she was an original ‘character’ aka an OG, (which I always think looks like ‘old girl’) but that doesn’t mean you own the joint. Get the fuck outta here woman.
Carmella should’ve gotten in ‘when’s the last time you saw YOUR daughter and grandchildren?’ You know damned well there’s friction there.
Vicki looking dumbfounded with her mouth gaping open and response of “don’t talk to me like that” was I guess the best she could do, is rather priceless.
Emily’s face is funny. Like bitch calm down. You’ve said shit 100 times worse! is it because it’s stupid Vicki it makes a difference?? And why would that be?? I think Emily says to her ‘who do you think you’re talking to?’ or something along those lines, then gives Carmella accolades in her yap. Typical Emily.
She makes excuses in her yap for having no comeback, because it’s just Carmella and she’s dumb. Wow, good one.
And why would she have her stupid ‘feelings hurt?’ For being called out on shit she ACTUALLY SAID??
She makes fun of the expiration date comment, saying yes we all have an expiration. Yes we do Vicki, but what she meant is your time on The Housewives has expired. And you know that. And it has.
Switching the convo to the sleepover from hell. So great, now we gave Cannon Mouth the stage. I’m ready to wind the episode down.
She’s already got the arms and hands going. They absolutely have to be connected to her mouth.
Cannon Mouth recaps the whole night after things went south, which Vicki knows, she didn’t need to hear a blow-by-blow, and neither did we.
They zoom on the guys’ banter for a second hiding out at the bar, still. Oh Terry you talk a BIG TALK when the boss ain’t around.
Vicki wants the ladies to take into account how SHE felt that night.
Carmella ridicules that.
Carmella’s soft spot then comes out because she really is a person that isn’t an asshole just to be an asshole. She reciprocates YOUR energy, and I think that’s really cool.
As Vicki starts to get vulnerable, and explains it was getting to be too much. She had apologized to Jenn, and it kept getting brought up. Then Emily wanted to harp on the rudeness is the car, and she got really annoyed and defensive. I’m paraphrasing.
Carmella tells her when she feels like that, maybe don’t lash out and say you need a minute, because women should support each other, not tear each other down. My words again.
Emily shut up with your ‘wanted to establish a bond’ BS. You were poking at her in the hot tub. That’s not what you do with someone you claim you’re trying to get to know.
And you DO know enough about her to know, that wasn’t going to go over well to keep reminding her how she was rude. She did apologize.
She uses her fear of Mike breaking up with her as one of her many excuses.
Heather hugs her a symbolic ‘everyone hug it out.’ Annnnnnd we’re over it.
OhmiGOD not another fucking ‘Persian party’ at Emily’s retirement fund’s house.
I don’t know what to say about that coconut game so I think I’ll say nothing. Except I think maybe everyone had sex that night. Maybe even Shannon.
Old ‘friend’ Doug may be getting lucky.
The OG’s rally around Vicki and baby her, as she TOTALLY plays the victim.
I hate that phrase, it’s completely overused and often incorrectly, but that’s exactly what’s happening here. (People tend to say it about the person who IS the actual victim, is why I think I hate it.)
She manipulated (almost) everyone into feeling sorry for her.
Carmella is understandably annoyed at that spectacle.
Gina has it right.
Don’t think Tamra was impressed with Doug’s ‘coke can’ claim. I’m not either.
Real question: is there an age where men actually stop talking about their dicks?
I love when they end like this! I hate the ‘to be continued’ screaming at each other crap!
