They arrive at Trixie’s in Cali, and Whitney makes her grand entrance with the uninvited Angie as soon as the ladies land.
Meredith low key scowls, and pretends to be unbothered.
And by the way, what in the hell is Meredith wearing? Did she borrow this from her daughter? In addition to her strange facial expressions, head gyrations and voice, she also has a weird gait and posture. Does she have some kind of disorder? Do you think she always wanted to be an actress and she’s living out her fantasy now? Anyway, she walks by as Angie and Whitney giggle and pat themselves on the back for pulling off their little scheme.
Lisa cries about her ring to Trixie. She doesn’t care and makes a joke.
I sort of want to go here. Who would not want to go here? I would even work here. Would it even seem like work? Maybe I’ll call up Trixie. I’m sure she wouldn’t hire me.
Meredith to Heather when pressed about her reaction: “there are bigger things going on in the world right now, if this is what makes her happy.” I agree, but doubt if she really means it, and she repeats this similar rhetoric later, but in much more dark phrasing.
Mary is being extra Mary this season. Is she pissed that they just have her back as a friend? Is she pissed she can’t continue to extort money from her church/cult, that I believe to have closed when all of the controversy was first out a few years ago.
Angie cheerfully invites her to sit with them to eat poolside, and she answers with a very pleasant “I’m not coming over there, please don’t talk to me like that, I don’t like it.” Okay then,
Then the funny part is that she sits ten feet directly behind them (maybe she’s worried about covid) and starts poking at Whitney, asking her why she came early. Whitney refers to Trixie as one of her ‘good friends.’ How is it these ladies are good friends with a drag queen living in Cali?
Mary just wanted to be cranky and combative and isn’t even interested in the answer. She cuts Angie off attempting to reply. Don’t you hate when someone asks you a question, that seems like a real question. but doesn’t even want you to answer.
Meredith shed the awful knit tie dye sweater suit thing, and now is wearing wedges that she can barely walk in, with a bathing suit. I do like the coverup though.
Meredith’s plan for the day is to pair off and shop, and they have to select each other’s outfits, which they are required to wear out to dinner. This sounds like a really bad idea. And I wonder who pays for it? Guess that’s tacky but I’m curious. Monica has been watching Housewives I see. She’s starting to turn on her supposed ‘friend’ that brought her into the group.
I love Heather’s sparkly cover up. Sai from RHONY, take notes. Heather doesn’t even profess to be any kind of fashion guru, and this is a much better selection than a raggedy old afghan. And she also doesn’t constantly point out, “hey look at me, look at what I’m wearing!!”
Angie bitches to the others about Monica, and here we go – it is officially on! Monica overhears of course and that whole predicable confrontation takes place.
******
Shopping trip in bathing suits, except Mary who is still dressed for February in Utah.
I really want to stop with all of these ‘trust building’ etc, rituals, and similar bullshit on Housewives. Their very job description is to be nasty and try to piss each other off. So, why are we still pretending this is not the case? The franchise needs to own this is what they’re doing.
Do you kind of feel like your intelligence is sort of insulted?? And I know probably not a lot of brain surgeons are watching Bravo, but we’re also not all mentally slow, although with some of the posts and responses I see on the FB chat pages, there are some slow folks that watch.
I think Mary and Monica make the perfect shopping duo. I could see these two forming an alliance. Right off the bat, walking in the store Mary says it smells like farts. She loves to talk about pooping and farting. Monica laughs extra hard at this since she’s trying to suck up.
Monica tries to engage with Mary and it’s just not working. She may break through at some point. Maybe.
Whitney and Heather take passive aggressive digs at each other while shopping.
Whitney: – “your butt would be popping in this.”
Heather: – “this will give you full coverage and pearls make it classy.”
Monica loves what Mary picks out (I do think she has good taste for the most part) and a breakthrough! She even gets a smile out of Mary. I think two seasons ago when I was recapping, I pointed out when Mary smiled, because it was so rare.
******
Meredith/Lisa pairing and Meredith’s choice seems puzzling. She made sure to let them know not to worry, the outfits chosen should be tasteful and not costumey, yet she chooses a belly dancer skirt for Lisa. Also puzzling, is why she’s dancing around, all giddy claiming she loves it. These stores seem like vintage or thrift stores, and very costumey. I can’t see this flying on any other franchise. I’m into it though. I love vintage and thrift stores.
Is Lisa trying to suck up to Meredith? Her choice is cute and fun, if they were supposed to just be hanging out at the motel, but their orders are to go out to dinner wearing their partner’s selection. She’s shimmying, and making the beads jingle. She’s so psyched over it!
When I first watched this. I thought she was joking that she loves it. I can see Whitney loving this, and wearing it no problem. But Lisa? No not so much.
If it weren’t for all of the goofy hats, their outfits wouldn’t be THAT bad, with the exception of Lisa,
The goofing around, and trying on crazy outfits exercise suddenly takes a downward turn when Lisa realizes she’s going to a bougee place, dressed like Princess Jasmine. She’s super pissed. I feel like I would just embrace it. You’re in a town where no one knows you. And as someone points out, you’re going to be sitting.
She’s not the only one dressed like an imbecile. I think she looks kind of hot. I would just joke with the server (because you know they’re in the back gossiping to the rest of the staff – “what’s going on with the outfits at my table?)
I was at a restaurant with my sister once, and her husband and daughter, and were completely overdressed, (long story. but it does demonstrate how supportive I’ve been of my sister, and how vile it was of her to turn on me three years ago – we still havens spoken over a minor incident) and our waitress: “I have to ask, why are you so dressed up??” I was thinking, “none of your fucking business!”
Okay so back to this, Lisa gets more and more agitated about what she’s wearing. At least she shut up about her ring. She refers to this wardrobe scenario, as ‘triggering.’ TRIGGERING? WTF?
“My shopoper in Milan sent all of these beautiful things to me.”
They arrive, and the hostess does the Mean Girls – ‘I love your skirt where did you get it?’ thing, and tells them they look ‘wonderful.’ She’s probably thinking, well they ARE from Utah.
Monica is the only one that looks remotely normal, thanks to Mary. Pretty sure Meredith dressed Lisa like this to be a dick. Little subtle payback for the “garbage trash whore, fucked half of New York” comments.
******
Okay, so Espresso martini’s – I have something to say. like how they’re all the rage now. Especially on Housewives. It’s been evident that since they’re trendy now, a few Housewives have ordered them while filming seemingly not knowing much about them – not even that they have coffee in them. First there was Kenya on Atlanta, who must have ordered it because they sound bougee, and everyone’s drinking them. She then tried to unload it because it tasted like strong coffee. Does she not know what espresso is?
Then we had Miss Fancy Pants herself, from OC, that ordered one while filming this season, and I have never seen her drink anything except champagne. She had to ask how they’re made.
Back to Salt Lake, they’re all ordering espresso martinis. I would imagine bartenders hate making them.
These actually look lighter than what they’re supposed to. Typically they are much darker. They must add a little cream or milk to theirs, which I actually used to do when I made them occasionally. They’re not really supposed to have milk.
I order them every now and then. It depends on where I am. You know how that goes, sometimes the setting or where you’re at, dictates what you order to drink. I prefer to not have strong coffee in the evening, so I always have to get them with decaf, and just trust that I’m actually getting decaf. I don’t think I’ve been burned so far. It’s definitely not a drink that you’re supposed to drink several of.
They’re a sipping elegant drink, Heather Gay, you’re not supposed to guzzle five of them. If she wanted to pound a bunch of cocktails, why won’t you just get like a vodka and soda or something plain?
Whitney does the tequila thing switch up, which I actually did try when one of RHONY ladies ordered it like that, and I absolutely hated it.
These fucking games they’re always playing, it’s so juvenile. Grown women don’t do this. I don’t buy that Whitney writes poetry either. She’s going hard for a new image this season. I think Justin is getting fed up with her immature and slutty behavior.
Monica shades them for being lame, and she proudly announces how she was fucking her brother-in-law. She tried to tell Heather last week, that she was somewhat ashamed and felt bad, and that’s why she outed herself, but it does not really appear that way.
It’s strange to me that the first thing out of everybody’s mouth is in what way was he was the brother-in-law. I think if somebody told me that, I don’t know that that would even register for me to ask that. I would be too busy being disgusted.
Whitney proposes another ‘game.’ Heather is the first to air her grievance about Angie, and how she doesn’t trust her… Bla Bla Bla.
Monica loves that Lisa has been a ‘good sport’ about wearing the belly dancing outfit. She actually did complain about it the whole way to the restaurant, but not important. Monica then scolds her for mentioning her $60,000 ring 60,000 times. Lisa does a good job of receiving this, but as usual bitches about it in her yap.
Well maybe if you wouldn’t have fucked your brother-in-law for a year and a half you wouldn’t be a single mom. Not sure why Lisa didn’t point that out.
Does Angie ever shut up about being Greek? We should start taking a shot every time Angie talks about being Greek in the episodes.
So this is where the dinner gets interesting, and this is why I say I think maybe Meredith wanted to be a theatrical performer all her life, but never pursued it. Also not sure how much wine and martini’s she’s had.
She likes nothing that Angie has to say, she’s not holding back at all, and she slips into sort of a Shakespeare-ish sounding renaissance era, British accent demanding that a server that weighs about 85 pounds, remove her from the premises.
Does she really think there is security in a restaurant? It’s not like this is a night club, and there’s a fucking bouncer at the door. She approaches this teeny dude, and orders Angie removed, because she is the hostess of the dinner!
I was surprised to hear that Meredith asked Angie about building a house. That sounds kind of like a joke to me, the serial Airbnb renters actually building a house?? I doubt that will ever happen. She seems to take this extra personally, probably because she is a little embarrassed. If they’ve never owned a home at this point in their lives, in their mid 50’s, is weird.
Angie really strikes some nerves, first with the house thing, and then telling her that her jewelry is collecting cobwebs, she’s phony, and her life is ‘rented.’ I think she is kind of sensitive to the fact that they don’t own a home. I know she has denied that when it’s been brought up before, citing that they could buy multiple houses if they felt like it. Yeah, no.
Heather still downing the espresso martinis like they’re shots, and laughing her ass off.
Meredith goes into some diatribe about children being disabled with her renaissance British accent. What does Meredith know that we don’t about ‘children’ suddenly being disabled?? Is Housewives starting to make predictions similar to The Simpsons?
Now it’s evident that Meredith is really ticked, and upset about Angie being here, when she’s been trying to pretend like she didn’t care. Oh well, she tried. Meredith hates her over something stupid she thinks Angie said,
We don’t know what ‘a lot of shit’ is. Apparently there are going to be some disabled kids running around. Well, maybe not exactly running around.
Talking to Lisa, she goes back into Shakespeare, and threatens to disclose ‘vumorrrrrrrs!!!!’ Apparently she has shit on ‘the husband’ which is a little reminiscent of Kim Richards on Beverly Hills many years ago, to Rinna — “Let’s talk about the husband.”
Some last season flashes and totally forgot about Lisa giving BJ’s for tequila sales.
They leave, and Meredith was clearly over served, because it’s not like her to be weeping on somebody’s shoulder like she is right now in the van.
Whitney ridicules Meredith for this dramatic big fucking trauma causing her to be so distraught. Now Mary is involved.
Trying to decipher what Mary’s saying due to her very poor grammar and limited vocab. She accuses Whitney of calling her ‘pornography’ which doesn’t make any sense, of course.
She needs a barely coherent Heather’s help with the actual word of what she was referred to as by Whitney.
‘Predator’ is the word she’s looking for. I agree one hundred with the perception that Mary and her husband are predators. They prey on the vulnerable, not super bright parishioners of their church/cult, and persuade them to hand over large sums of money to them.
Heather officially cannot even get out of the van.
The driver wants to bash their fucking heads together. This poor woman just wants to go to hell home, and get away from these crazy ass Mormon freaks.
She’s so fucking pissed. She about to get even more pissed when Heather starts puking in the van, into a leaky bag. Gross. Have a feeling she won’t be ordering a espresso martini for a very long time. Can you imagine puking up five of those things??
