It’s new New Jersey season. Here we go.
What is wrong with Teresa’s voice? It’s so much more annoying than normal.
What? A big restaurant brawl? That never happens.
Too bad we have to wait three entire months to see it.
Lots of ‘oh oh oh Ozempic!’ going around Jersey. Dolo, Teresa, Fessler and Margaret all looking pretty svelte.
Rachel’s nose is absolutely hideous, Is it possible that it’s even worse than last year? It looks like a pancake with nostrils. And she’s making fun of Jennifer’s? Wow.
Rachel tells her entire extended family about Jen Fessler’s upcoming surprise party, and all of the drama as to who’s hates whom this week as if they all give a shit.
Rachel is still pissed that Louie hired a private investigator to try to dig up dirt on her husband. Which I’m sure he did do, which he denies.
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Look who redid the entire front of their house after viewers brought to their attention is was ugly as fuck. They seriously needed Bravo viewers to tell them that?
Joe Gorga an architect you are not. It still doesn’t look great, but looks better
These Melissa and Teresa scenes at home are so boring and robotic, as they talk about each other. The camera man keeps zooming in on Melissa’s body.
Marge is wearing I don’t even know what. It looks like a trash bag, but she clearly thinks she looks good. She drops in on Fessler who outdid herself serving grocery store containers of pasta salad and soggy fruit.
Margaret complains about her ex passing away and now she feels like she no longer has that connection with the stepkids, and whatever. who cares.
They also discuss sketchy Louie and how he called and harassed her son, I think the one that’s her actual son, at his job. Louie also denies this.
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Dolo and Tre Stump meet for dinner with their guys. Teresa’s overworked face and her sudden rapid weight loss, are making her look really distorted and weird.
Dolores and Teresa must’ve made up during the off-seasons. They were at odds last year due to all of this erratic behavior of Louie’s, and Dolores just not having it and feeling uncomfortable. And why does he always wear white T-shirts?
They discuss the fact that Paul is still married which is preventing him from proposing to Dolores
Paul is immediately annoyed that Louie brings this up.
First Tre-ism of the season. First episode, twenty minutes in. “They can beat at their own drum.” Referencing Paul still not being divorced upon being separated for TEN years. So even if she said the expression correctly, ‘dance to the beat of their own drum’ it makes no sense in this situation. She knows Dolores is upset that he’s still married and didn’t start divorce proceedings until fairly recently.
Now this: “Louie is such a gentleman.” Sure Teresa, that’s about as intelligent sounding as ‘beat at their own drum.’
So what makes him this ‘gentleman’ even though I’m pretty sure he had ulterior motives for wanting it off camera, is that he texted Fuda and wanted to meet to iron out their differences from last season, and Fuda declined. Most likely because Louie is shady and wanted to have the discussion off camera, so he could lie and retell his own version. Fuda tells him he’ll just talk to him at Fessler’s party.
These numb skulls claim how they’re not about the drama, and that’s why he wants to have a private conversation.
Are you listening to this bullshit?? Do they think viewers are stupid? Yes, Some are. I’m on a lot of Bravo and Housewife FaceBook chat groups and WOW! Just wow.
They do a flash scene and Teresa claims she’s not about the ‘minions’ gathering if he would talk to Fuda at the party. Sure, Tre Stump and Phooey, you’re TOTALLY not about any drama, or making a scene, at all.
This is the reason for Teresa’s very existence.
I made a post about her screwing up the ‘dance to the beat of your own drum’ phrase, and this chick tried to tell me people that live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones and SHE screwed that up and said ‘don’t throw stones at glass houses.’ Talk about hilarious, and ironic. Can’t make this shit up. I said “is this Teresa?” I don’t think she responded.
So Paul and Dolo are of course, agreeing with these two, since that was their assignment, that it should be a private conversation.
Duck Lips clarifies that she is not going to giving Margaret nor Melissa access to her sparkling fucking personality at the party. I’m sure theyi’re very upset.
So what her, enemies, which is most of the cast, had a meeting before the reunion to discuss the game plan. Who cares.
Dolores gasps as that, as if she wouldn’t do the same fucking thing. They didn’t really need to discuss and plan how to take them down. They did all of that work on their own, and made it pretty easy. Louie did anyway with his stupid P.I. and harassing phone calls. What an idiot.
We all know damned well there was more to the story of Frankie suddenly leaving his job with Louie. I don’ know if we really care at this point, but most of you should know by now that Louie is super sketchy and his businesses were most likely not legit.
During that reunion scene, you could see them all exchanging smirky glances, and Teresa looked guilty as hell while Phooey had a smug face. Dolores maintained there was no drama and nothing to see here, and that Frankie just decided to leave due to another job offer.
My fucking ass.
Teresa looked like she wanted to throw up during that entire reunion last year to be honest. Not her normal reunion demeanor. Normally she’s yelling and bullying everyone around (or trying to) and just acting like her normal neanderthal self.
Mics even got Frank mumbling to Gorga that he’s not going to say anything else about it unless it gets brought up first. Without wasting my time researching, my assumption is that Frankie caught onto his questionable activities and immediately wanted out.
Dolo used the excuse that she ‘didn’t want to bring Frankie into it’ or speak about her kid. That always annoys me when Housewives do this shit with their adult children that they choose to have on, and had them on before they were even 18 to parade them around.
But then do this shit when something uncomfortable is brought up that they don’t want to talk about for whatever reason. He’s not a child. She clearly asked him to be filmed with her. So why this sudden shut-down when there’s something significant that really should be discussed.
To use the excuse of ‘protecting your child’ when you’re really protecting Tre Stump is ridiculous. As if she would do that for anyone.
I can’t stand when they sit at these reunions and fucking lie.
Dolores confirms in her yap that a pre-reunion meeting is not a big deal. Which is what I said.
Teresa’s issue is that she’s not used to being on the receiving end of it. Usually it’s her tearing people down.
She seriously thinks people aren’t happy for her and Louie because they’re jealous of her.
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Time for this stupid party. Teresa and Jennifer arrive together of course. They talk about their vacations, in their Uber or chauffeur ride, because God forbid these bitches would drive themselves anywhere. Teresa confirms what I think we already know, that she’s not into sight-seeing while on vacation. Teresa we know. To be fair, not to defend her, Sardinia isn’t a big sight seeing part of Italy, but still, she just has no awareness of how she comes off. To say you’re ‘not into sight seeing’ while in Europe makes you come off as kind of shallow and stupid.
I like to lie on the beach doing nothing as much as the next girl, but don’t sound like a dumb ass in front of the universe.
Jennifer’s clearly not doing the Ozempic.
Shady Louie, since Fuda declined his offer of a ‘private chat to clear the air’ suddenly has some bogus business meeting in Florida.
Again with the lying. Bravo should be docking their pay by about 100 grand every time they sit and fucking lie to get out of owning their shit.
Also who wants to tell Teresa she’s a terrible liar. So we know.
In his business, which no one really knows what that is, things come up last second, she claims. Something just happened to have come up the night of this stupid fucking party. And I love how it had to be in Florida, to make it sound as if he was unavailable in the evening.
Bill is not accompanying Jennifer because he is working. I’m totally shocked those two are still together. I see she’s still taking his toxic horribleness.
Something seems off about Jennifer. I don’t know what. Maybe it’s just the weight gain.
I love how all of these Italian women are taller than their Italian husbands. God, or the universe, whatever you believe in, must’ve been had it in for Italians to have made that the norm. I think it’s kind of funny.
Speaking of men, I don’t get why they have to feature the dudes so much on Jersey. If we wanted to watch a bunch of stupid idiot guys fighting and waving their dicks around, we’d watch sports, not Housewives.
So this is around the time when Fuda’s ex started flapping her yap about him being a drug dealer. I can believe that. I said last season, I was a little apprehensive in believing he was this big ‘businessman’ as they were trying to sell us.
Fuda tries to gets ahead of it, knowing it’s going to come up, and starts joking with the boys about how it’s such nonsense. Such nonsense.
That seems kind of random for his ex to make up the dildo comment. Clearly she’s looking to embarrass him due to them shit talking her last season.
Melissa is dressed like Jasmine from Aladdin for some reason. I have to get my outfit commentary in as always.
Here we go again with Dolores, same fucking story as when she was with Dr. Doolittle, who I’m pretty sure was in love with Frank, by the way, where she has no marriage proposal, and pretends she doesn’t care.
At least Paul is at least trying to get a divorce. Allegedly. She lets out a huge fake overcompensating laugh when Melissa tells her it seems like she doesn’t care. She cares, believe me. I guess they’re forgetting she did this shit with the other dude.
David refused to marry her too, and she ran around telling everyone how she didn’t care. Then broke up with him for not marrying her.
Melissa repeats the exact same thing that Teresa said, “oh what’s the rush?” I’m assuming they’re trying to make her feel better. It’s not that it’s a rush. That’s not the point.
It’s kind of annoying that her boyfriend is married to someone else. I don’t know why everyone is blowing smoke up her ass like this. It’s an issue. Who the hell is separated for ten fucking years and never gets a divorce? Someone that doesn’t really want a divorce.
The guys laugh about the dildo thing, and you know they realize it’s probably true.
I have to say, I really do like Teresa’s dress. I would wear that and look better in it. Just kidding. Not really. Jennifer looks like she’s going to a prom in 1985,
Joe looks immediately bothered by Teresa’s presence. I’m sure it is hurtful to have a sibling totally write you off like that.
And let’s face it, all of their drama really stems from Teresa’s longtime feud over nothing, and irrational jealousy of Melissa.
Yes, Melissa has said some questionable things over the years, I agree they’re fame whores, but she’s constantly playing defense, and having to stick up for herself. When you’re put in that position, you tend to say things that can easily get taken out of context.
Like the whole ‘food on the table’ bit. Yeah that sounded bad. Teresa’s so dumb, she was taking it literally.
Melissa was merely wanting to point out when Teresa needed financial help, and assistance with her kids while Joe was in the slammer, she and Joe stepped in to help, and Teresa is ungrateful as fuck. THAT was the point, and it’s valid in my opinion.
I don’t have a boner for Melissa or anything. I’m not saying I think she’s all that. Teresa has treated Melissa like shit for no reason, since the second they were introduced twenty years ago, and if you haven’t been able to pick up on that, then you must be pretty dumb.
It’s funny when Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dumbass come prancing in, it looks like the parting of the Red Sea, everyone starts darting in the other direction.
Literally, Teresa is at odds with fucking everyone except Jennifer. When she was at dinner with Dolo, she was claiming she’s great buds with Danielle and Jen Fessler, which I find hard to believe. I’m sure they’re just tolerating her. She needs someone to film with besides Jennifer. Duhhhh.
Some cousin of Jen’s is doing the worm for some reason.
Who cares about Jackie’s book. She’s trying so hard to stay relevant. Margaret is miffed she got left out of receiving this advanced copy. Melissa explains she’s having Jackie on her dumb podcast, and that’s why she got one.
Relax Marge. Nobody was purposely excluding you from her stupid book where I’m sure she yammered about her eating disorder and perfect life. Someone that had to take this horrible Ozempic shit to be skinny, do you really want to read about someone with a lifelong eating disorder that you can’t really relate to? No.
I forget what their relationship is. It’s hard to keep up with who hates whom on these shows, especially when the new seasons start.
The guest of honor who of course knows nothing of this party, and is going to be taken completely off guard, finally arrives.
All of these bitches are taller than their husbands. Awkward.
Jennifer Aydin is surprised Margaret was nice to her. Teresa tells her she was only nice to her because she’s her friend. I guess she meant by that, she knew that would piss Teresa off.
Jennifer gets a little shade in, and says “usually people are not nice to me because I’m your friend.” Look who’s grown some balls over the past year. Teresa doesn’t find that amusing because she has zero abiltiy to laugh at herself.
Fuda and Gorga are like the Bobsy Twins I see. They joke about Louie’s absence.
Paul is helping Dolores cover for Louie and Teresa. That’s nice of him. He confirms with the twins that he’s away on business, that happened to be on this night. In a different state.
These two are dumb asses, Gorga especially, and you’re even insulting their intelligence by regurgitating this crap.
Paul seems to be taking the Louie shade really seriously. Why are these dudes all completely crimson? Too much time at the shore with no sunscreen or what??
Paul repeats how this party wasn’t the place for them to have the discussion.
Yet it’s the perfect place for Paul to discuss with Fuda how this wasn’t the place for the discussion.
Can’t make this shit up.
Dolores looks on like she’s proud of the Housewife new addition. He’s following his marching orders, Earning his check.
So this escalates and the House Husbands all start arguing about Louie.
Am I the only one seeing the irony? How they’re arguing and making a scene at this birthday party, about how it was inappropriate for Louie and Fuda to argue and make a scene at this birthday party??
Very weird the way Dolores is standing on the sidelines watching. She claims in her yap that she doesn’t like it, however she looks like she likes it.
That was dumb AF. They sounded like a bunch of pussies.
Teresa now approaches Rachel, who isn’t about the drama at all if you recall, bitching about Fuda.
She’s trying to put packs of Starburst into her bag, but keeps missing the bag. What a fucking FUCKTARD!!
Now Teresa and Fuda are yelling at each other. So Louie bailed on this party because why again?
Oh right, this wasn’t the proper place to have a serious discussion or altercation.
And because Louie is a gentleman. What’s with Teresa and this weird new ‘thug’ persona that she’s trying to pull off? She doesn’t see how ridiculous BlaBla on VPR or Erika on Beverly Hills look?
