I did watch the Premier episode but did not get to the recap.
I’ve had a hard time getting caught up after I fell behind a couple weeks ago. Or a month ago. I can’t stand the sound of Kyle‘s voice. It’s literally like nails on a chalkboard. Is it getting deeper?
I feel like she hasn’t mentioned her girlfriend, now ex, I assume, or her little dip into the lady pond season. Are we to pretend like that didn’t happen?? Typical Kyle and typical Bravo letting her get away with it. I read at the end of last season Bravo told her she needs to share. So far I’m not seeing evidence of that.
Really dumb taglines as usual. Maybe I’ll take one a week to pick on.
“The hills have eyes and they’re all looking at you? Kyle” No they are not. Why does she think that?
Because she’s a TV STARRRRR? I foresee that line from the OC Reunion, being a very famous meme very soon.
I’m not sure I’m even getting the theme of this party but that’s okay. All we know is Dorito is getting a lot of ridicule for her flying saucer on her head.
She and Kyle are having this super-serious discussion about the demise of their friendship or whatever. It’s very ******
Dorito is quite upset how Kyle said she “exaggerated their friendship.”
That was pretty bitchy.
Kyle basically admits it was bullshit and they were actually close, but she was retaliating because Dorito ‘hurt her feelings’ at Bravocon with some jokes she made on stage.
They replayed the scene and clearly she was joking around. Kyle was even laughing.
She’s making that up. What a twat.
Are we loving this new spicy, gives zero fucks Dorit?
Taking a Carrie Bradshaw-style drag on a ciggy whilst going 80 down the highway, telling Kyle like it is and calling bullshit on her fucking stupid stories.
(Dorito face)
Dorito claims her pissiness has more to do wth Dorito telling Andy on WWHL that she feels like Kyle is ignoring her since Morgan is in her life.
Kyle’s face sort of says that she’s right, but the dumb twit had to make something up, because she didn’t want to bring attention to her lesbian affair last year to a girl the same age range as her children. She looks stunned actually.
Kyle deflects by playing the marriage woes card.
She takes a big old swig of her water, which would have been much more dramatic if it was liquor, and storms off.
Dorito bitches to Erika.
Was that not hilarious when she told Erika that her PK were separated and Erica was all but jumping up and down with joy.
Dorito seems to be getting along famously with this new Boz chick. Wonder how long till that explodes.
******
New wife Boz Saint John seems like she might be a little too smart for Housewives. I also feel like she won’t be afraid to put little shit pile that is Kyle Richards in her place.
She definitely needs it. And I am here for that!! I’m feeling like that must be why they having her and Dorito being buddies, since she and Kyle are on the outs. If ya get my drift.
What?? Did I just predict the season??
Her ‘workshops’ seem to be a lot of bragging about herself if you ask me, and less about inspiring others, but I know we are just seeing a clip. Whatever you do, don’t ask her how you snag that corner office. Someone needs to tell her it’s sort of a metaphor, and also isn’t her job inspiring others to succeed? So why is she annoyed at that question?
She seems kind of arrogant in my opinion, but I’ll deal with it happily if she points out every time that Kyle says something stupid. Which is a lot.
She’s like seven feet tall. I hope she pings her across the room when she starts getting lippy or tries to sound smart.
******
Kyle meets with Sutton and I see their dynamic has not changed. Sutton tells her she got Botox, and Kyle stares at her face, asking “how long ago WAS it??” Being the snarky little twat she always is. At pushing fucking 60, she just cannot stop acting like a bratty little sister. I swear to God.
Can’t WAIT for her to say something like that to Boz.
Not long till they’re discussing Mario, and Crap Pile Kyle starts taking credit for all of his success, and points out how she’s part owner of The Agency,
She thinks their divorce is going to take two seconds and Mario is going to giver her half of The Agency. She contributed nothing to his business.
She thinks everything will be split right down the middle and put a little fucking bow on it, and everybody’s gonna walk away with smiles on their faces.
******
Erica and Dorito drop in on Boz. I’m sure Erica hates seeing these lovely bougie homes that she knows she’ll never have again, unless she marries another rich old man. Hopefully she’s learned her lesson and won’t spend every last cent of his money on her dumb shit.
Although she STILL does not seem to own her part in the demise of his finances. Is she stupid or something???
Or should we give her a reprieve because of her NPD?? Remember last season she learned what empathy meant?
Dorito drinks champagne out of a wine glass? What is happening? She’s doing some serious ass-kissing with this woman. Remember she absolutely refused to drink champagne from a wine glass at Teddi’s. REFUSED.
But here she is, so very happily removing her shoes as requested and drinking champs from a wine glass.
Erica makes a valid point. I hate that, when the bitches I hate and make fun of, say something halfway intelligent and poignant.
‘PK and Mario are out having the time of their lives, and Kyle and Dorito are like losing their fucking minds and at each other’s throats.’
Isn’t that just the way it always works?
After a couple separates, the woman is mourning the loss of the marriage, and the dude has a new girlfriend like two fucking seconds later.
It’s a tale as old as time. Most of the time, they’ve already had the side chick.
Who the hell knew Dorito and PK’s relationship was so volatile??
Not us! Not the viewers since she lied about her marriage for several seasons, clearly.
She even went so far to say at the last reunion in her stupid Little Red Riding Hood getup, that that things were “betterthan ever.”
Fucking liar. Meanwhile, they’re screaming profanities at the top of their lungs at each other non-stop.
Seems Sutton and Kathy have made up. They did not seem to be on any sort of good terms, to say the least, at the end of the reunion last season.
Remember Sutton even had some sort of nervous breakdown thing as soon as Kathy sat down and she promptly exited the reunion. Kathy must’ve had some serious dirt.
They’re organizing a pizza party thing for Kyle because she’s sooooo down since Mario dared to replaced her picture with him and his DWTS chick.
I think that’s kind of funny. Normally I would think that’s douchey, but it’s Kyle so I’m up for whatever Mario wants to dish out.
Why? Because Kyle is like a fucking little gnat that needs flicked away and put in her place.
I started noticing several seasons ago, how it seemed Mario was over her and her childish antics, could barely stand to be around her.
We love Quirky Kathy scenes. She pretends to be an Amazon delivery guy to get into Kyle‘s gate. This is the Kathy we love. Not the bitchy one when she’s with her own family. That scene of her yelling at Paris over some fucking tray she got for her husband? CA-RINGE CITY.
This stupid pizza party ensues so when can baby Kyle, because it’s not as if she’s been fucking babied and tiptoed around for sixteen fucking years, Well all her life actually, but as far as we’re concerned, sixteen years.
She looks like Pocahontas.
Kathy makes fun of Mario’s IG posts in which he’s showing off his physique wearing really really really short shorts.
Kyle is in some delusion that this divorce is going to be the most amicable and drama free divorce in history, you know because her marriage was so much better than everyone else’s. Then why did Mario high tail it outta there? Huh??
But let’s just let her go in her delusion. Seems neither one of them has yet to file at this point, from what I looked up online.
I’m sure if Mario gets a serious girlfriend, (or Kyle) that’ll light a fire under one of them. Maybe she and Morgan will reconcile.
******
Erica remarks to Sutton she should be happy about her very healthy monthly payments via her divorce settlement, when Sutton complains they don’t even speak anymore.
She’s getting a big fat monthly six-figure installments which we all know. Erica is insanely jealous of.
What I find fucking hilarious, not in a funny way, but in a pitiful way, is how Erica still does not seem to be able to comprehend, or know that WE all comprehend, that there are no monthly alimony payments because she fucking spent ALLLLLL of that dude’s money. And there was a lot of it!
Is there any point when she’ll just like admit that? She’s making such a fool out of herself. The viewers know this, but she doesn’t know that we know this?
We can read, Erica, we can do math, unlike you.
She was spending thousands of dollars PER MONTH on playing Madonna and ‘touring.’ The costumes, the venues, the people, the lessons…
Hundreds of thousands of dollars regularly.
She forgot Tom had some like you know, overhead in running a fucking massive law firm.
She is dumb as a fucking stump.
Kyle should be walking away with a nice settlement. Mario would be nothing without her, she thinks. There is no way he could’ve gotten into real estate without her.
Every other person in Southern California is a Realtor, but okay. Kyle who can’t even read a news article, and was raised by the town ho, scraped him out of the gutter and made him what he is.
******
PK and Dorito meet to break some bread together, and talk about how absolutely volatile and horrible their marriage has been for several years.
Who knew??
We sure didn’t. She’s been acting like everything is hunky fucking dory.
Who knew he was a raging alcoholic?? We sure didn’t. Why didn’t we Dorito??
She thought since cameras were rolling that PK wasn’t going to be divulging the dirty laundry, and would play her game.
Her expression was kind of excited when he started out saying “you’re my wife and my best friend…” She thought he was going to go into a bunch of warm fuzzies and pretend like they just drifted apart, then added, “but we don’t speak to each other nicely.”
She’s exactly like Kyle, you know. Covering up and not admitting marriage troubles. But the two of them, Kyle especially are more than willing to talk about everyone else all fucking day long.
PK points out how he did stop drinking when she asked him to. He’s the classic House Husband situation we’ve seen time and time again. where he pretends to be more successful and financially secure than he actually is.
This kind of happened to me too, to be honest. I was with a guy that totally misrepresented himself in terms of money and success. He even told me that he owned this huge beach house that his parents actually owned.
That was embarrassing, when I realized he was lying. Yikes.
Seems like this is what PK did with Dorito, except times 1000. I’m sure he came into the marriage with gambling debts and issues, and not nearly the money and income he pretended to have.
This ties into the last part of the conversation, which is getting a lot of social media backlash.
PK’s little sermon that when they first met and were married, he was the big fucking cheese and jet setting all around, and she was this wide eyed naïve little girl impressed by him.
Well PK, she’s no longer impressed by you because frankly you’re not very impressive.
A sleazy alcoholic with a gambling addiction owing casinos millions. Dealing with thugs that broke into his house and held a gun to Dorit’s head. Allegedly.
She thought she was going to squeeze out these two babies in two years, and was going to be taken care of for the rest of her life by her dream boat Brit.
PK has the nerve to be annoyed that she put their kids before him with?Dorit looks a little stunned at that. That was a shitty thing to say.
Onto him complaining she has made him feel like ‘less than a man’ with all of her insults and digs.
And I’m sure there were a lot of insults and digs due to what I just described above. He’s not what she thought she married because he lied.
But I feel like I would be remiss in pointing out, was she even into him, or into the money she thought he had?
In my case, when I found out my ex was a broke-ass loser who couldn’t keep a job, and lied about the beach house, I stayed with him because I did love him and I wasn’t looking for a dude with money, I was looking for a dude that loved me and treated me nicely. I thought he was that. But since he lied about having money and owning a beach house, of course he also lied about what kind of person he was.
That should have been a red flag I suppose. Looking back, there were a lot of red flags.
She suddenly acts as if she ‘gets it’ now because he said this to her nicely and calmly. He tells her they need to stop the ‘co-dependence’ and they wouldn’t be speaking several times a day anymore.
At least they don’t have money to fight over like Kyle and Mario.
Wonder how her swimsuit and wedding dress line is doing. Has she even mentioned it lately?
