VPR 5/21/24 – Reunion Part 2 (2nd part recap)

Not feeling Ally’s nor Joe’s dresses. Especially Jo’s. And for a hairdresser, her hair – yikes, what even is that? That fake pony looks literally like a horse’s ass. Not to be rude.

Poor Jo. She gets introduced as “definitely NOT Schwartz’ girlfriend, Jo.” That’s rough.

Very disappointed in Schwartz’ treatment of her. It’s like he was following Katie’s instructions or something?

She wanted to be on the show, she got on the show. She got bullied and made an ass out of, but she got on the show.

I did admire her bleaching his hair and making him look stupid to get back at him for acting douchey.

Here we go with the Katie faces when Jo explains how she was in between places and needed somewhere to stay so Schwartz offered up his couch. When he and Katie were officially separated, and she had hooked up with multiple guys and was bragging about it.

But I told Schwartz he wasn’t allowed to date you.

She didn’t want Schwartz but also didn’t want anyone else to have him. That’s a very typical reaction of a very toxic person. It didn’t matter that it was Jo, and she’s eccentric or whatever. She would have had the same reaction regardless.

Right from the get go of Andy asking Jo about the dynamics of their relationship, Schwartz is uncomfortable with his hands all over his face. Like liars do.

Nope there was no relationship, honest.

They’re so awkward. Clearly Schwartz regrets hooking up with her, leading her on, and saying all of the things that he said to her to make her thing that he was into her. Such as ‘I love you.’ As if there are several different meanings to that phrase as he’s trying to sell.

Okay, so I do believe that Jo knew that Sandoval and Raquel were banging. I’m not defending keeping that under cover. I would hope it made her uncomfortable.

Buuuuuut I am sure that Schwartz swore her to secrecy and made all kinds of excuses for why it was okay. And he was following Sandoval’s orders. She doesn’t even deny it when Ariana lists the reasons as to why it was obvious she had to have known.

Andy asks Schwartz why he wasn’t honest about their relationship and he says a bunch of bull shit that made no sense.

BlaBla is very interested in exactly how many times they were having sex for some reason.

I really need to know exactly how many times and in what positions?

Katie fiddles with the neckline of her dress. Which she hasn’t really stopped doing and it’s annoying me. They admit to once or twice a week.

Why does that matter? Are these not two single, available people? Katie is super distressed at hearing the once or twice a week fucking frequency I guess, since she and Schwartz had sex once or twice the entire ten years they were together.

Katie chimes in stating that she felt bad for Jo and Jo seems to be flattered by that.

I don’t think she really meant it in a complimentary way though. More like she pitied her, and enjoyed it. It’s maybe a backhanded compliment at best. She does sound almost genuine though. Who is this person? Did they throw an AI robot in there because they were sick of all of her constipated faces?

Schwartz mumbles and mutters and tries to half-deny and half make excuses for telling her that he loved her when he clearly didn’t mean it, and two seconds later acting like she’s nuts for thinking they’re in a relationship and denying that he even said it. Jo keeps pulling at her earring looking like she’s ready to cry.

I said I loved you then Katie told me that I didn’t.

I just wanted to let her know I cared about her…” What?? DUDE ! Is this the autism issue or are you that much of a bonehead?? OF COURSE when you’re dating and having relations with a woman and you say ‘I love you’ she’s going to take that as being ‘in love’ and not that you just ‘care about her.’

Don’t you think it would be smarter to say he said it, but then changed his mind and decided he didn’t want to be in a relationship at that time? Isn’t that what people say when they’re just not that into you, and don’t want to be in a relationship with YOU?

You know the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ thing.

Katie calls it ‘fuckboy behavior.’ Whooda thunk it? Schwartz a fuckboy?

Sandoval defends his boy and eludes it was the ‘editing’ that made it look as if they were actually dating.

BlaBla also takes Jo’s side. Love this, girls sticking up for girls, and yells “why is everyone trying to make her feel like she’s fucking nuts?” She is a little nuts but not in this instance.

She wonders why she had to be a secret and he’s out in the open with this other chick. If I were to place a bet, I would say it was because of Katie and her disapproval of Jo. Schwartz for whatever effed up reasoning, is needing Katie’s approval and is upset when he doesn’t get it.

It’s the only thing that makes sense. He does admit when pressed and bitched at by everyone that they ‘had magic’ for a while and then it dissipated. Yeah dude it ‘dissipated’ because you were scared of your ex-wife!!

I’m taking her side here at the reunion, but also hearing a lot of her melting down on IG live, etc to the point where Schwartz has her blocked everywhere and is publicly begging her to stop. She even called his mom and was shit-talking him to his family. He’s referring to her as a pathological liar. As he sits here on this stupid bar stool lying his ass off.

I think she’s really really hurt and feels taken advantage of. But she did really want to be part of this sick warped Bravo world, even though she’s acting like she didn’t, so there’s that.

Not that you have to be on Bravo to be lied to, used and taken advantage of. She does need to get it together though.

I’m spending too much time on this. Schwartz can stop with the looks of annoyance. She has a damned point that it was rude to try to hide her and keep her a secret. That’s so hurtful. All because you’re too pussy to stand up to your EX-WIFE?

Katie said we weren’t allowed to hang out okay??

Andy asks about the new chick and he calls her ridiculously good-looking as well as eleven other various other praises, and THEN says “that’s disrespectful to Jo, I don’t want to…” Too late dude. ‘Ridiculously good-looking?’ As if Jo is ugly is kind of what you just said.

They start to flash on all of the horrible things that Katie was saying about her.

Jo completely loses her shit seeing the hurtful things that were being said. Keep in mind not said to 3 or 4 girls, to a million people. I think I looked up one time that’s a good average number of Bravo viewers. There’s a million of us lunatics.

Katie seems somewhat remorseful seeing Jo upset, and tries to make excuses which don’t really land or seem to have much credibility. Like I said, yeah Jo’s weird, Jo’s odd. She’s displaying some disturbing behavior now but Katie, because she thinks she owns Schwartz, would have said horrible things about any girl-woman-whatever that he brought on the show. And that’s the damned truth.

I just didn’t want him with anyone honestly,

She blames going through a separation/divorce and having Schwartz associated with someone SHE “didn’t feel comfortable with” as to why she had been announcing to the world that Jo’s on crack and a psycho.

This excuse absolutely proves me right that she feels like she owns this weasel of a man that allows her to get away with it. I hope if this show is over for good, that Schwartz breaks off all communication with Katie. He needs to move on.

I think the only reason she even wants to share the dogs is to stay in his life. He can make sure he’s not home when they do the swaps, and she can let herself in and out to drop and retrieve the dogs. She doesn’t even seem like an animal person at all. Poor Graham was trying to get her attention at James’ and she acted annoyed and couldn’t even pet him for two seconds.

And that’s my two cents on that. She is toxic AF and she’s a bully. And Schwartz is such a pussy!!

She calls her name calling of Jo publicly ‘colorful.’

How about ‘I’m sorry.’ How about that. You and Ariana are two of a kind. Neither one of you can own your shit. Her excuses suck ass. Andy has to spell it out, and say “so do you apologize for the tweets and so forth…”

Yeah I do.”

But do you??

Katie honest to God acts like Jo was screwing around with Schwartz when they were together. It was AFTER they split up, filed for divorce, and were living separately. Katie your excuses are shit. She’s being meaner to Jo than Ariana was to Raquel.

Scheana is so proud that she banged John Mayer. I believe she did but would you keep publicly announcing it if he was publicly denying it? Clearly he’s embarrassed.

Graham seems to be thriving in his new home and let’s just leave it at that. Okay well one thing. I do believe James being kind of spastic, and was drinking a lot then, there was probably some truth in what Raquel said, but she may have embellished a little about the frequency.

I’m still trying to figure Ally out, if she’s sincere about James or not, or if she wanted to boost her music and astrology career. James tries to say Ally didn’t give him an ultimatum to quit drinking, but it sounds like one to me. I just don’t think he wants to admit that another chick had to tell him to stop being a drunk ass fool constantly.

I know it’s petty, but I really wish Katie and BlaBla would stop tugging, smoothing and pulling at the tops of their dresses. Can the producers tell them to sit on their hands or something? Or just say stop it? Have we not learned by now to wear something comfortable to sit it for several hours?

Poor Ann had to clean up after Sandoval as well as text him every move Queen Ariana made about the house. We address Ariana interviewing her in the kitchen and how Sandoval felt betrayed. No one cares.

Now the animals and Ariana’s bragging how SHE PAID FOR MYA!

Can we move past Mya eating the wooden skewers with half-eaten food she left on her nightstand from the night before, and having to go to the hospital and poor Ariana had to pay for HER dog to get medical care? That’s what Sandoval should be saying. It’s YOUR dog remember, when she bitches about the vet bill. It was an accident. I’m sure Mya spied that rotten food and hid under that bed waiting for access and the door to be closed.

Ariana whines she should have been consulted before opening her bedroom door.

Okay and what was she going to say, ‘No you can’t go in there to do a repair to prevent having to replace an entire A/C unit?’

I blew the dust off of my wallet paid for my dog.

And who would pay for that Ariana?? We know not you!

I would like to hear her say in reference to Mya, who I think should be with her over Sandoval, instead of ‘I PAID FOR HER!!’ How about ‘I chose her, I take care of her, (I’m assuming that, maybe not if she doesn’t even clean Kitty’s litter box) she’s more my pet than yours…’ something like that. Ariana seems so focused on money, which is an attribute of someone that’s a tightwad and likes to hang onto it, even shirking her responsibilities so she can hang onto it.

Sandoval rolls his eyes at that, and James goes nuts and starts a rant about Graham being taken from him, not realizing (and this is speculation but pretty sure I’m right) he’s rolling his eyes at Ariana pointing out the one fucking thing she paid for to contribute to the household.

Yes I know you paid $300 to adopt the dog!! Congratulations!

Sandoval dangles some tea he has on James and he’s ‘keeping his mouth shut.’

James goes on another rant. Something about the British accent and his tirades just don’t go together.

You’re a poopoo face! So THERE!!

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