You know with Naomie as the narrator, and the way she’s running around shit stirring and making sure she’s the focus, it’s just become so obvi that Whitney approached her before filming to be the ‘main character’ of the show this season.
The show used to be somewhat based on reality, but true to form now with Bravo, SC is being over produced, and scenes are manipulated with provoking and gas lighting style rhetoric.
Last week’s ep was a perfect example – Shitney, as im starting to call him, and naHOEmie, manipulated the whole scene when Shep was drunk, NaoHOEmie keeps poking at Craig, and NaHOEmie pretending to be pissed at Venita, and telling her to shut up.
What’s sad is that Venita was not in on this ‘let’s pull out all the stops and make NaHOEmie a star’ plan, so she was visibly shaken and upset over Naomie’s treatment of her. A friend of ten fucking years!
Either make these shows based on reality, or have them scripted, not both! Don’t have the people you want to be the star going by a semi-script, and others thinking it’s real.
Leva – I love her pink house. Olivia calls her, “how are you about not going on the trip?” (that sounds like a really stupid thing to say naomie)
Of course she’s not missing Craig’s bougie party. Duh.
Craig and Paige – he got her all her favorite things to snack on. – awwwwww Dudes SHOULD do this! It’s just a cute subtle thoughtful thing to do. Paige never had a cheeseball?? what ??? Guess it wasn’t ALL her favorite things.
Paige wants him to invite Naomie? She tells him to call her. Feeling over produced – again, or still.
Patricia’s holiday decorated house. Yikes. While I think she has great taste in other areas, such as beverages, food, and entertainment, her decorating style is just so out there tacky and so tasteless. (as well as her clothing choices)
Stuffed animals everywhere? Is she six?? Oh lovely brunette Barbie -Patricia ‘angel’ (whoever heard of a brunette angel??) on top of the tree? Barbie heads in a wreath? I even like Barbies, but sheesh!
NaHOEmie shows up – without a shirt on! Shocker! So I was reading online she may have gotten a whole ‘mommy makeover’ type thing complete with a tummy tuck and the works?
I have never heard her mention one time anything about working out ? And she is either working out every day, or had surgery. Then again we know nothing about what’s goin on with her other than who she’s been fucking, so… whatever.
Getting the feeling this is going to be an annoying scene with her slobbering all over Patricia.
They’re doing “chambongs’ These are a new thing to me, and strangely I want to try it.
Patricia claims in her yap that she “never gets high on champagne.” You CAN catch a buzz from champagne. I thought in an earlier episode she did? Who does she thinks she’s talking to? Why do 2these Bravolebs think the viewers are stupid. It’s mindless entertainment, true, but it doesn’t mean we’re all a bunch of morons in our non-bravo viewing lives? She claims she could do five and it wouldn’t have any effect. Maybe she’s just the stupid one.
Now her other protege is at the door. This woman better be naming these two in her will for all of their fucking trouble. Like they really want to hang out with an 80 year old woman.
Okay, so we will be having Drunk Patricia here shortly.
What’s not entertaining about that? News flash – when you chug alcohol verses sip it like you’re supposed to, you’re gonna be getting shitfaced!
Whitneyyyyyy enters the room.
Bottoms up! They waste no time chambonging. I feel like this may be kind of a waste of champagne.
You certainly can’t even taste it. But I guess it looks like a fun thing to do. Once. Looks like they’re sold out on the website – probably thousands of people ordered them after this aired last week.
Of course they’re available from you know who. A website I just don’t want to promote.
I cannot stomach Whitney and Naomie’s interactions. People who think they haven’t really been hooking up, I think are wrong. She does this coy awkward thing around him, like I think they actually have been. I don’t think she’s really attracted to him, however I do think she had sex with him.
“I have never seen anyone do that in MY LIFE!” As Whitney takes a big bite of caviar. Okay girl give it a rest for five fucking minutes. It’s pathetic.
And round #2.
Now Whitney, the butler, serves them regular glasses of champagne in FLUTES not coupes !! The nerve – guess he figures she’s too plastered to give a shit right now.
I love Madison’s outfit! Naomie’s in a tube top and Madison is in glittery formal wear.
She just cannot get herself to put on a shirt. She is reminding me of Dolores on Jersey this past season, when she had just gotten got a tummy tuck. Every fucking shirt she wore was a belly shirt.
I’m assuming she got the whole package – tits and tummy tuck. Didn’t really think that’s something she would have needed. Maybe she gained weight being with Matul dude who treated her like shit and cheated on her.
I found Madison’s top online – it’s over $200 – (and that’s 40% off). Guess she has more money to spend on clothes than Paige. Paige’s green dress I liked wasn’t even 30 bucks. I did order it, so we’ll see! I’ll have to model it for you guys.
Craig calls Naomie and does his dutiful call and re-invites her to his party.
Whatever, who cares. Patricia is now on the floor from her chambongs. They showed two rounds, but there may have been more.
Actually, it’s more interesting than Craig fake apologizing to Naomie, and pretending like he really wants her there at his party.
Patricia, still on the floor, encourages her to go. Of course she’s going. I admire Pat’s ability to sit on the floor at 81. If I sit on the floor for longer than two minutes everything falls asleep and cramps up.
She forgets what she’s saying.
Paige and her super cute go-go girl dress go to check out the party venue. Craig is sticking with the no-seating chart. Apparently he thinks having assigned seating would cause more drama than not. Which of course, the opposite is true, unless you purposely put everyone beside who they hate. Surprised he didn’t just go with that.
Shep takes Taylor out his deck to talk to her. He says happy three times in one sentence. Taylor forgot to bring the shots out.
I’m assuming, purposely he goes into this intro type thing as if he’s going to propose, then drops the “I want you to quit your job so we can travel.”
So we know now what we know, that she ended it shortly after they got back. Of course since he said “just quit your job – I’ll pay for everything” she assumed upon returning, he was going to propose.
If he had no intention of doing that, why didn’t he just see if she could take an unpaid leave for a month. Her employer possibly would have worked with that? She is/was an assistant in an orthodontists’ office in case anyone wondered.
The things he’s saying to her, I must admit are really sweet. I love seeing him be vulnerable. We’ve never seen this in 10 flippin years. We’ve never seen him with a girlfriend in 10 flippin years.
He goes into some Bill Murray thing about how traveling with someone extensively is the ultimate relationship test.
You can tell she’s considering it, when he asks, after the initial disappointment of no ring.
I guess I can’t blame her, except for the fact that he’s not trustworthy. And I don’t believe she has the silver spoon thing goin for her. So she needs to work, unless he plans on leaving money on the dresser every night.
She is worried that this looks like she’s spending HIS money or whatever. As if he cares. He does nothing for his money. This is the second time I’m watching it, but when I originally was, I was 99% sure she was going to accept the offer. Otherwise she would have been pissed and said “fuck no, asshole! You’re trying to make me dependent on you, then you can act as asinine as you want!
I’m not putting myself in that position, are you CRAZY?? We’re not that HAPPY!! I’m DONE!” She didn’t say this.
Okay so what in the holy hell is with Austin’s underwear choices? Last week he was wearing PINK ones with a pattern I couldn’t make out. He comments how his dick looks huge. I’m sure his future boyfriend will be happy.
Looks like Kathryn is making an appearance this evening. Did you all hear the controversy about why she was not on the St. Simon trip? Apparently she showed up to film with her face all bashed and bruised up. Rumor is that, it was Chleb? I don’t want to believe that. But I did read that. Hopefully it’s not true.
I’m not feeling Paige’s dress and hairstyle at all. AT all. The side cutout is weirdly placed, too low, and the black bow blends in with her hair color, and looks like mouse ears. She should have gone with a bright red bow, or white, or anything other than black.
Craig tells her she looks like Cindy Lou Who. That should have told her something was off. But she thinks it’s a compliment. Nothing is flattering about this gown on her. She usually has better taste.
Craig is feeling himself about his pillow hobby turning into a lucrative business, as they play several flashes of everyone making fun of him, especially Naomie.
The clip they played with Patricia was actually deserved though, if I recall. Remember that’s when he was still being super lazy and unmotivated, and she asked him to make her some dog pillows, and he procrastinated getting started, and was past her deadline, then just literally used clip art. I had to laugh, when she said it looked like clip art, because it was!
Taylor’s dress is gorgeous! My favorite I think!
Leva looks likes a wench. Also looks like she’s sucking in her stomach. Trying to compete with Naomie with her bared midriff.
Marcie is here in a skin tight gown with not one little bit of poof in her belly. Has to be some serious spanx. That cannot be possible two weeks after giving birth.
Olivia picks up Austen, she must have gotten a spray tan, she’s afraid to hug him with his white jacket. Just NOT feeling these white jackets on dudes.
Madison’s dress seems kind of off. I don’t like it. I think it’s pants actually. I like what she wore to Patricia’s to do chambongs better. I’m not lovin her hair either. Venita’s is kind of meh.
Whitney and Pat arrive, with their fucking entourage. Or are these Pat’s dates? Whitney’s dates?? Does he think he’s Elvis or something?
The more I see Paige’s dress the more I am in shock. From the side as she’s walking, you can see her entire ass. So, guess a white dress and no underwear she doesn’t see as a problem. Because she’s petite, the cutout is off, I think. It should be higher.
Loving Olivia’s dress, if it’s sparkly, it’s okay in my book!
Naomie arrives with the other Madison. And since Naomie’s here, so we know the drama’s about to go down.
When I watched it originally all of the Naomie/Leva drama happened so fast, about seating, I thought I had to be missing something, other than there was no room at the ‘main’ table, and Craig asked them to sit at the table beside them. Of course we all expected some sort of seating drama since they spent so much time talking about how there wasn’t going to be seating drama.
Craig approaches her and apologizes for “disinviting her” – I like ‘uninvite’ so much better. I looked up ‘disinvite’ a while ago, because I didn’t even think it was a word – I literally never heard it until I started watching Housewives. Apparently they’re both acceptable.
I’m just in shock she’s not in tight leather or latex pants and a sports bra.
Naomie admits in her yap that she could give a shit less about being here for Craig, and is just here so she doesn’t feel “forced out of a friend group that SHE is in.” And there you have it. Naomie in a nut shell.
She is stomping around like she’s on a mission. It’s really strange She’s even copying Kathryn’s ‘stomp.’ She seems really off. What’s she pissed off about already. Or is that just how she walks? Or is she just trying to be Kathryn??
Venita approaches her, and she is not in on how NaHOEmie’s very non-reality acting to claw her way to the top of the show. She ignores her. She literally just walks away from her, along with this poor dude she was pretending to be interested in talking to.
Austen points out Taylor’s “smokey eye.” Okay guys – COME ON. He’s gay! There’s nothing wrong with it, but he definitely is!!
Kathryn arrives with some random dude. Something is totally off with her face. Looks like she’s wearing a TON of matte makeup. It’s hard to tell she has her hair covering it and they’re not zooming in on her, at all. She looks really gaunt and pale.
Leva interacts with Craig and one of his partners, and she is all about getting in weird digs. “Ideas are the easy part you know that right?” Basically she’s laying the groundwork for trying to cancel him out of his own business and event.
Craig: “That’s why I have my team.”
I don’t agree with her. A lot of people are not one bit creative nor smart, and couldn’t come up with an idea if their life depended on it. Craig is both creative and very intelligent, whereas, Leva you look like a tired old desperate wench.
Watching this the second time, and knowing the shit she says at the end, about his business, it’s painfully obvious that all of that was planned out. Not sure if they were aware they were not sitting with the group, but I believe Leva planned on announcing that Craig “doesn’t really run his business.”
This isn’t my area of expertise, but isn’t that a sign of a successful entrepreneur, if you can afford to pay people to run the day to day, and you just come up with ideas? It shows he has the cash flow to pay people, so there must be income generated?
Maybe she’s not sure how businesses work, maybe her restaurants aren’t that successful. Maybe she’s jealous.
So this also explains why Naomie looks so tense. She needs to earn her keep tonight. Whitney has assigned her and Leva to blow up this party.
Marcie has been filled in or Shep’s orders to Taylor to quit that embarrassing job and “travel the world” with him.
This scene is where you can also tell she was going to accept the offer. Taylor talks about having to work, and having bills to pay, and Marcie tries to act like she can relate. But you can totally tell she’s excited and planning on telling him yes.
Remember Austen saying “if she has any self-respect she will not do that” when Shep rolled this idea out in the car on the way to St. Simon island? So there you go. I guess she doesn’t. She’s jumping at this opportunity. I wouldn’t call her an opportunistic person, but it was presented, and why wouldn’t she? Travel to different countries and wherever with money being no object? I can’t really say I blame her.
But I do think she should have told him no, and told him she’ll take a leave of absence from her job to take a long trip, however not until they’re engaged.
Shep rolls this out to Whitney and Craig and they point out, this means she’s dependent on you. Taylor doesn’t seem to be thinking of that part. She is thinking this is the stepping stone to getting engaged and married. She was wrong.
Naomie is being really cold to Venita. It’s very Lisa Rinna like and hard to watch. Venita is visibly hurt and upset.
Can I remind everyone all that she said at the table was on the trip was “let’s just validate Craig’s feelings.” Or something like that. No one was even ‘coming after’ Naomie, as she’s trying to sell it. She knows she’s exaggerating and lying, even. If anything, she started coming after Craig with same old same old same old again, because he was ignoring her and she wanted to be the focus of the cameras. Get over the ‘crazy ex-girlfriend’ comment!! By bringing it up constantly, she’s proving him right.
The dreaded, but much anticipated, getting seated for dinner segment. Purses have been deposited to claim spots. And it is chaotic. Madison won’t stop pulling at her top.
So what really was the big deal for the three ‘single’ girls to sit at a neighboring table? At least at the moment, I know Naomie’s desperate, and fucking Whitney, and Leva is married to the invisible man, Other Madison, I have no idea.
Naomie is nervously sipping her tequila club soda with a splash of orange juice. Which sounds gross. And I like tequila.
Right on Naomie! “you can’t sit with us!!” (Mean Girls) Nobody wants you. Why didn’t she leave and blow Whitney in the Rols? She needs to work for this Bravo check.
Leva bitches in her yap too about “not enough seats for us” as I’m looking at the venue and there seems to be plenty of empty seats. What am I missing? Those three are all friends, so it’s not like you all hate each other and are forced have to sit together. I would think that’s more fun. I would sit there and get shifaced on his free alcohol.
Leva decides she wants to go and sit with Craig’s staff. She has no idea how they put up with him, she says. Naomie is bitching that it’s “uncomfortable.” Why? Because she can’t provoke Craig from a different table?
Madison makes fun of what Leva is wearing, which I have already done, so I can’t really say anything about that. I would not have worn a black dress to a ‘Winter Wonderland’ party. And it’s not even dressy. She looks stupid with her midriff out. It looks like a dress that you would wear to a barbecue.
Olivia gets all dramatic about her saying that. NaHOEmie and Leva continue to look constipated and sulk.
They allow Shep to say grace for some reason. I would not be wanting to be holding people’s hands right before I eat. You don’t know where those hands have been. Especially the dudes, who don’t even wash their hands after pissing.
Shep’s prayer: “God, Ummmm…” and it doesn’t get much better after that.
Leva deems it the dinner from hell. Seems a little over doing it. And don’t say hell right after grace!! Naomie and her duck face keeps looking at Leva, and shaking her head. It’s so extra.
Naomie is refusing to eat like a preschooler does, when they’re mad. I don’t know who she thinks she’s punishing by not eating. She’s not three. Her parents aren’t here.
Hopefully her dad is looking down at her from up above, with extreme disappointment that this is what she’s reduced herself to. I’m sure he’s at least glad she has shirt on though for a change.
Craig makes a speech and thanks his partners right off the bat, for helping him make his idea a brand. So doesn’t seem like he’s hiding the fact that this isn’t a one man show, and does it all himself.
It totally negates Leva’s temper tantrum at the end, where she acknowledges them, as if Craig does not.
Leva says for the second time, “I want to sit down with Amanda and Jerry.”
Does she expect them to bad mouth Craig with her? Does she think they give a rat’s ass that she is sitting at another table with her trashy BFF?? All they want is to chill and relax and eat free food and drink free booze?? BuzzKILLLLL!
Whitney comes back, he had left to take Patricia somewhere. She immediately asks her master, “What do I do??” She may as well be in a genie outfit, and he may as well be in a Navy uniform. It’s sort of how she dresses anyway.
This is so demeaning for her. I guess he didn’t already give her the proper instructions of what to do in the event of the catastrophe of getting seated at another table.
She tells him, “we probably should leave.” Did she mean ‘we’ as in him and her? Does she wanna bang??
Leva is squatting on the floor at his employees’ table, calling Craig an asshole to his partners/employees.
Minnie Mouse alerts Craig that Leva is with his team.
Craig tells her to leave. “You’re making this all about you, and it’s about me and my business, and my team, so you should probably just leave.”
I don’t know – is he wrong?? I feel like, no. Bitching about where she was sitting for half an hour, really was making it seem as if she were some important component to his business. She’s not involved whatsoever.
He never said he was Elon Musk. But he is the owner of his small business, and if you’re bad mouthing him to his partners and employees, that is grounds to be asked to leave. And he asked you nicely to leave, for the most part. There was no “get the fuck out!!” It’s not like we’re in Bougie Beverly Hills where people speak like that.
Craig continues to ask her to leave. Her argument is “I also have a business on the same street as these people. The people that actually run your business, not you, you clown.”
Okay and her point is?
Even if Craig’s antics irritate you, and they do me, it is kind of funny how he kept his cool, for the most part, while kicking her dumb ass out.
Madison and her teeth get carried away celebrating that whole scene and Olivia gets annoyed again with her, calls her a bitch and walks away.
So what I didn’t get, the first time around was why Naomie didn’t go with her GOOD friend Leva, after she was asked to leave. Perhaps Whitney ordered her to stay.
Naomie does walk outside as she’s halfway to her car, and says half-heartedly, like she’s praying she says no, “do you need someone?”
Not, “I’m coming with you” as a true friend probably would after you were humiliatingly kicked out of a party. Especially when a minute ago, she was pissed off and wanted to leave?? Did she suddenly get over the seating arrangement being traumatizing?? Does she want to hang around to suck off Whitney?? She seems fine now. Did he offer to slip her a grand if she shuts up and stays??
So of course Taylor quit her job and took Shep up on his offer.
Of course they got back, and she thought they were getting engaged.
Of course he had not intention of marrying her.
