Jen Shah, I don’t know about you guys, but I don’t give two goddamned fucks about her ‘depression’ that she’s dealt with “all her life.” That’s everyone’s go-to when they want pity. If you’re a person that does sketchy shit, cheats, steals, lies etc etc, just play the childhood trauma or ‘mental health’ card.
She felt like she “got to a good place until she got indicted… she’s been going throug a living hell…”
This hag is in some serious denial. Give us break woman. Why do I have a feeling she’s going to get off easy? They again postponed her sentencing until January! First it was November, then it was moved to December, now fucking January?? Who really gives a shit about her fucking holidays being enjoyable, do you ??
Heather, Danna and Angie H meet for breakfast/brunch. Angie is totally NOT invited on the Cally trip. Danna HAS been invited, by Meredith, as Meredith’s guest. Oh my God, okay. I’m sure that won’t get thrown up in her face at all at some point.
Why doesn’t Heather bring Angie H as her guest?
So it’s snowing and five minutes ago they were lounging at an outdoor pool. I’m actually ready for some snow, in my east coast area. It’s hard to get in the Christmas and decorating spirit with snowmen, and snowflake stuff, when it’s 60 out.
Meredith visits Jen for tea time. Jen rambles about fasting and Ramadan whatever. More fucking whining about her plight. Meredith being her bestie is coming off so disingenuous and phony.
My best guess for the reason of the sudden thaw with Meredith towards Jen, (when it looks pretty obvious she’s guilty at this point and lying through her fucking teeth non stop about her ‘innocence’) is that she wanted her fair share of ‘camera time.’ She knew Jen would be getting a lot, and if she decided to pretend to be her friend, that would help her get more recognition on the show.
With Mary no longer included in the line up, and her feud with Lisa, and being down to only four Housewife cast members now, she needs to be fake friendly with everyone else. These women literally have no integrity whatsofuckingever.
Meredith fakes force smiles, and laughs at Jen’s attempt in finding humor in her situtation. I think Meredith wants to speak her mind so badly, but is biting her tongue.
Meredith talks to her about how the convo with Danna when she told her she wasn’t invited on the trip on last week’s episode, and she’s in the “fight of her life” and just more of her typical disturbing rhetoric that makes you want to throw a brick at your TV.
They play a flash of her talking to Coach about her dilemma, and her lawyer needing $200g, (it makes her so ‘angry’ that she has to pay these people to fake defend someone they know is guilty AF) and how the trial is being pushed again. She is wearing no makeup whatsoever, and I hate to sound like a karen, but her face without makeup, she looks like a goblin and a pirate had a baby. Her skin is awful. Is that sun damage?? And her nose?? Yuck make it stop. She looks like my ex BF’s girlfriend.
I mean that’s some serious ‘contouring’ she must be doing when she does her makeup. Even her teeth seem off. Does she wear false teeth??
Jen we know your kid is in medical school. Got it. Please stop. Focus on the issue at hand. You’re an evil lying shyster, not to mention, looks like an old hag without makeup. He’ll figure it out. That’s what student loans are for, and when he becomes a doctor he should be more than capable of paying them.
Meanwhile at breakfast Danna, Angie H and Heather gossip about Jen and what a spaz she is. They discuss this trip, and Meredith is the CEO of ‘fun’ or whatever. Meredith tells them that she wants to invite Danna Heather is having a cry baby little tantrum thing about going to Cally with everyone.
They pack for San Diego. Believe me I am an over packer, so I get it. But three suitcases for three days is crossing over into complete idiocy.
Poor John looks like he wants to puke when she causally says “let’s run down to the Louis Vuitton store because I have to grab a few things.” For two people running this huge tequila empire they seem to have a lot of down time. Maybe I’m being jealous.
Whitney’s and Justin’s house seems like one of those ‘cookie cutter’ thrown up in two weeks, ‘development’ type house. Maybe I’m being jealous.
Whitney talks in her yap about her and Heather’s whatever it is.
Whitney we don’t even understand why you were mad at her in the first place. And no one takes you seriously. Well we barely take any of them seriously, but with Whitney we REALLY don’t take her seriously.
Girl, you’re mad at her for not recalling and repeating a piece of gossip shared during a drunken social event. Take a seat.
Whitney is about six feet tall. Who the hell wears 6 inch wedges to the airport?? Why if you’re already on the taller side, (5’6”) would you even wear 6 inch wedges to begin with? Maybe she wanted to be able to reach everyone’s carry-ons for them. I always have to ask someone.
Danna stands awkwardly at the airport drop off waiting for Meredith or Heather, since no one else is talking to her. She called Jen a bully. Big whoop, she IS a bully.
Heather has three suitcases too. Don’t any of them own like a large suitcase? That way you have one to check and you bring a small carry on with emergency items – just in case… (no pun intended)
Anywho she’s trying to maneuver these three suitcases up the escalator. Wouldn’t she have had to check them? Is their baggage check and check-in up the escalator? I’ve never been in an airport where that was the case. And how did she think that was going to work anyway?
Whitney bitches about “another domestic trip thanks to someone and their travel restrictions.” Okay Whitney, have your unemployed pussy whipped husband (thanks to you) take you to fucking Europe then. Fuck, shut UP!!!
Omg Meredith’s laugh … I don’t know how to even imitate when trying to convert it to text. Wahhhhhh hahhhhhh hahhhhhhhh???
As always, they toast and joke in the van on the way to the destination how much fun is going to be had, when we know there will be zero fun to be had.
Their trips remind of my ex husband and our beach trips with our kids, how he always promised we were going to have fun and ‘no fighting’ And in the car on the way there, he would act like a fucking douche bag about something trivial, and proceed to start an argument.
Then carry that douchey energy and animosity for the whole fucking trip, of course spins it all around on me for ruining it the entire trip for being upset he said something mean and douchey. Ahhhh life with a partner with the typical narcissist personality disorder, who cares not one bit for the well being of their spouse or children. Always so fun and relaxing.
Well the house is gorge, and Whitney is “so confused as to who is hosting the trip.” Why does it matter ? Like for real, what difference does that make to you? Not to mention I guess that was complicated in the van where Other Angie explained the accommodations were provided by a friend of hers? On these Hosuewife trips, what the fuck does it matter who ‘hosts’ it. It’s a free fucking trip where everyone complains, drinks way too much and argues?? Take ANOTHER seat.
Now the commencement of room selection arguing and nit picking begins. Who wasn’t excited for this??
There’s some sort of odd power struggle, whose dick is bigger, type of energy between supposedly 20 year friends, Jen and Other Angie. Jen seems annoyed that she has the audacity to be showing everyone around the house as if she was the official ‘planner’ of the trip. As if.
Her friend is the owner of the home. Whitney wants to keep rewarding Jen with the biggest and bestest room in the house.
Jen: “I fucking planned this shit and you get the best room.” Can anyone out there imagine being this shallow and greedy and giving zero fucks about it?
So if Other Angie is the reason behind scoring the free mansion, wouldn’t that also make her one of the ‘planners?’
I can’t get over how tall Whitney is in these shoes. I should probably just get over it. I’m 5’1 and maybe jealous. I do have some really elevated shoes myself, however I’m only 5’1” so they turn me into an average size person, not an NBA player.
Jen is pissed as ever and making plenty of snarky comments to her so-called ‘friend.’
“Usually the planner of the trip gets the master.” They bicker about who gets to speak and Jen tells her she fucked up the room situation. Everyone awkwardly looks at the floor as Jen talks to her like she’s a fucktard for daring to step on her toes, then proceeds to pour champagne over her head. Seems to be the Housewife thing lately. Are they getting a bonus for pouring and throwing drinks on each other??
Heather and her Heather sense of humor, that we all fucking love, if you don’t you’re obviously a complete buzzkill karen, and compares this to the scene in the Steven Spielberg cult classic ‘Carrie’ when the Mean Girls pour pig blood over her as she thinks she is crowned Homecoming Queen. I couldn’t sleep for like a week.
Jen then pours it on her own head as well. What is happening? Whitney from way up yonder is making some weird face as if this is in any way surprising of Jen Shah behavior.
Jen tries to minimize that very demeaning action when she was obvi pissed that she wasn’t the focus of attention.
After that awkwardness, Jen gets her moment and tells everyone about some yacht trip they need to get ready for.
This is sort of reminding me of the ‘Big Salad’ Seinfeld episode where Gorge gets pisses that he paid for the salad, but Elaine hands it to the chick, and she thanks her, thereby getting credit for paying for the ‘Big Salad.’
Whitney walks out of the house towards Jen in a really weird odd gait that seems like she was told to walk as weird and unnatural as possible in her 6 inch wedges. I really need her to take these shoes off. At least she’s not lookng at the camera guys for approval constantly this season.
This chick really is a joke.
We have to revisit for whatever reason the cringy scene (that makes my lady parts burn when I watch it) of Jen pouring alcohol directly into Whitney’s vag as she was hanging upside down in a skirt on the rolling bar. What does her daughter think seeing this??
Jen makes excuses that she was “lightening the mood” as Whitney and Meredith stand there and give her disapproving looks. But say nothing.
Jen we all know you weren’t lightening the mood, more like putting her in her place. Whitney doesn’t officially scold her because we’re all afraid of some ghetto ho with one foot in a prison cell for some fucking reason. But advises her to go talk to Other Angie. Meanwhile Other Angie is bitching to Lisa.
Lisa makes excuses to herself for not speaking up in the moment. I mean there were like what, six fucking women there, and NOT ONE said something?? THAT sounds familiar!!
Jen is still trying to jusify that she has been her friend since college, so what’s the problem?? Meredith does some strange pretend commiserating laugh again.
Even though she knows this is fucked up. Same Meredith who refused to be with Jen in the same fucking room last season, after her arrest.
Or possibly this is a different Meredith, literally. Her face DOES change every year. This is the Caitlin Jenner Meredith Marks. Next year, maybe we’ll have the Khloe K Meredith Marks.
Angie discloses to Lisa she planned and PAID for Sharriff’s entire birthday party. Apparently, since she provided her home as the venue, Jen gave ZERO FUCKS for letting her ‘take complete control’ of THAT gathering, and allowed to her to foot the bill for even the food, drinks and entertainment and didn’t even ask Angie if they owed her anything. Guess that complete ‘take over ‘ was okay though right, Jen?
She discloses the astronomical amount that she spent on Jen’s behalf (15g)
Meredith contuinues to have her tongue in Jen’s fucking butt hole and assures her that Angie is “not even mad” as she literally cries on Lisa’s shoulder and tells her she’s so mad right now. I think she’s really hurt and humiliated, and I get it.
Can we stop using the phrase “fight for her life” when we describe Jen’s crime and arrest situation? Is she getting the death penalty? That’s the phrase she uses and these dip shits just repeat it. Does she have a terminial illness?
Lying about your dirty sketchy business dealings in a court of law, is NOT fighting for your life. It’s called more lying to stay out of prison.
I love Heather but these shit colored baggy stretch pants ain’t it. Even for just casuaolly haning around the house, they’re too ugly for even that. They are not only the color of shit but they look like she’s also carrying a load of shit.
I hope they don’t make Danna a Housewife next season because this chick will NOT be able to hang with these ho’s. She’s too dang nice. And you know these bitches will take full advantage of that shit.
They discuss the drink head pouring and while Heather says she’d be pissed, she also says that she kind of agrees with her that Jen needed her to shut up so that she could talk. Heather, please. What DOES Jen have on these bitches?? Cuz ya know she ain’t payin them to auto side with her no matter what the fuck she does. It really is a lot like Erika on Bev Hills, this bizarre alliance to blindly support someone Anywho, #1 is a greedy ass lying, piece of shit criminal, and #2 continues to embarrass and humiliate others just for fun. It’s getting weird. Heather I thought should be smarter and wouldn’t want to come off like a fucking numskull.
Heather clarifies in her yap she’s just glad the focus is off of her, and how shitty of a friend she is.
Jen barrels in on Heather and Danna and starts defending her behavior again. So let’s see, if you really didn’t do anything wrong, would you really have to run around the house explaining and defending yourself?? Typical behavior of a fucking criminal who also can’t own her illegal activities.
She maintains how everyone was ‘confused’ and that’s why she poured champagne on Angie’s head. So after she did that, did everyone cease being confused? And what were they confused about ? Whitney may have been confused, but that’s just because she walks around either drunk, or in a state of drunken confusion, or just confused.
Heather tells Jen OF COURSE YOU CAN USE MY ROOM, OF COURSE YOU CAN! WOULD YOU LIKE TO POUR SOMETHING OVER MY HEAD???? BY ALL MEANS, PLEASE DO. I’LL LEAVE MY WALLET ON THE DRESSER, HELP YOURSELF TO MY CREDIT CARDS !!
On her way out she tells Danna she knows she wants to speak up for truth and righteousness, but she’s a guest of a guest, so she should just not say one fucking word.
This reminds me of some sort of fucking cult or something right now. Hmmm, how fitting when Heather refuses to leave a so called religious organization, that’s literally a fucking cult.
Stay in line, shut up, you’ll appreciate your free trip, or else…
“Pick your battles wisely that’s my advice”
WHAT THE LITERAL FUCK
Starting to lose respect for Heather. She may as well be handing her a glass of poison fucking kool-aid.
“The loyalty runs deep with Jen and these ladies” Danna clarifies in her yap. Yeah no shit, what I said.
Now the calls to home from their rooms.
“Get that 401 figured out” Whitney tells Justin. I’m surprised she even knows what a 401k is?
They all emerge dressed in their yachting attire.
Jen is dressed like Mrs. Roper for some damned reason. Ya know I must be slipping because I don’t think I would have made that connection at all, had one of my FaceBook friends and readers not pointed out. I promised to give her a shout-out, so thanks Kimberly Randalls. She really does! It’s awful!
They flash to Angie talking to her husband earlier, telling him Jen is accused of conning people out of their money, and she allowed her to con her out of money.
Which is basically true. However, you do have to put some of the blame on Angie for allowing it.
At this point did she really think Jen was going to ask her if she owes anything? And why didn’t she bring it up if she expected payback, and why wouldn’t this have been discussed, when she offered to do all of the planning and hiring of businesses for food and entertainment?
Twitter viewers seem to think she was kissing ass to get on the show, and now that she sees how unappreciative Jen is, she is now wanting to be repaid or at least acknowledged about how much she spent, and how nice it was of her to do that for them.
So now it’s all tense and awkward as they try to leave for this yaching event, that JEN PLANNED!! Jen planned this, this was Jen’s idea!! Okay??
And we know that Jen and these ‘sprinter vans’ have bad history. Well actually Housewives in general and these sprinter vans are always a bad idea, just like bougie dinners at their vaca spots.
“People get mad because I just speak the truth.” Well I mean, okay not a shocking comment from Jen, she got pretty ticked last season when everyone was speaking their mind about her sketchy ‘business’ and arrest.
“Raise your hand if you thought it was funny.” No one does. This ‘raise your hand if…’ is a Salt Lake thing for sure. It’s been done numerous times when they’re arguing.
Jen knows she’s fucked as soon as Angie utters the words ‘Sharrieff’s party’ Did she think this wasn’t going to come up, when she started treating her so disrespectfully? I don’t blame her for bringing this to light.
Other Angie: “I paid for the entire party.”
Mrs Roper: “No you did not.”
Other Angie: “What did you pay for? Jen awkwardly looks in her purse.
Is she getting her checkbook?? Or some tired old necklace??
Heather of course defends Jen in her yap, that Angie shouldn’t be disclosing this in front of everyone. Why not??
Jen did have three hours of opportunity to approach her and apologize before they left.
Instead she opted to go on this explanation and clarification tour through the house, justifying her actions. So whatever, I don’t care that she’s humiliated and feels like a big fat moocher. She should. Maybe she’ll again announce that her kid is is medical school for the 400th time.
Jen justifies in her yap why she offered no money nor reimbursement whatsoever. But in the van she’s saying she DID pay. So she needs to pick one.
Either she thought she should pay for at least part of it, or she assumed she didn’t need to pay a cent. I agree it was confusing the way Angie presented it when it was initially being planned as a replacement for a housewarming party.
There still should have been some sort of convo or inclusion of Jen perhaps in the emails with the various businesses.
Not sure what Coach Shah not drinking has to do with anything. She seems to be just reaching for various excuses and reasons. Of course open bar is expected at a fucking birthday party, regardless of whether or not the guest of honor drinks or not. Jen is quite clearly embarrassed, and she should be. She looks like an ungrateful fucking moocher right now, which she definitely is.
Angie goes on to point out she didn’t even get one expression of gratitude such as a card, no offer to help clean up.
Jen screams and screeches that she gave her a used ugly 5g necklace, that she bought with stolen money of course. Gee thanks Jen.
Angie points out in her yap that shes afraid to wear it for fear that the feds will yank it off of her neck. Kinda funny. And honestly because she paid 5g for it, doesn’t mean it’s now worth 5g. Not to mention that’s not even half of what she spent on the party, also it’s ugly.
They continue to bicker about the party, and her lack of gratitude or respect. Jen now desperate says “I didn’t even want to do it at your house!”
Mrs Roper stop playin! You know full goddamned well that you could not have afforded to have it wherever you were initially supposedly having it. I’m sure you cried to her hoping she would offer her home. And then end up paying for it. And explain why Sharrieff needed a big fucking bash anyway?
Jen, still sounding desperate for validation in her yap, said she should have billed her. Well Jen, did ya ask? Did ya offer to at least get the food or alcohol??
She tries to justify this by bringing up having a birthday party for Meredith three years ago and spent 80g.
Throwing an actual party for someone, and saying you’ll host something at your home on behalf of someone, are different, which she knows. She’s again contradicting herself all over the fucking place.
First she claims she did pay, second she was planning on paying, and third, she should have gotten a bill, fourth, when you host a party you fucking pay for everything.
Mrs Roper is pretending to miss the point, that this is now coming up due to her petty and shitty treatment of someone who dropped thousands of dollars for a charity party for Jen’s and Sharieff’s dumb broke ass. Yeah I’m dragging Coach down because why the HELL is he not kicking her ass to the curb? Why is he shelling out money for her when he HAS to know, even before she finalely plead guilty, that she was swindling all of these people? Him covering for her and defending her make her just as guilty as she is. So there to all of the people that demand to know why Coach isn’t getting dragged for Jen’s crimes as Erika on Bev Hills is for Tom’s crimes.
After leaving the van, Mrs Roper’s disciples, Heather and Meredith flank her and ask her if she’s okay. She at first wants the attention, and a pity party, but realizes she’s too embarrassed, she knows she took advantage of Angie, so she doesn’t want to keep discussing it.
It ends up being a very telling scene because you can totally see this thought process unfolding when in a split second she goes her typical from whimpering fake cry while doing that eye rub with her knuckles that frankly I’ve never seen anyone do over the age of like four. Toddlers cry like that when they’re tired and cranky. But whatever. She hasn’t matured since she was toddler. Sounds like some deep rooted issues there.
Anywho, once she realizes if she accepts the ohhh poor Jen, then she’ll have to converse more with them about it, and defend herself, and she would much rather just have it dropped, so she quickly morphs into being over it, waving her hand and saying it’s fine. That was weird.
So love when we actually catch these real, and real embarrassing moments with the housewives and catch them in their stupid fake fuckery since they’re such lousy actors. Even the actual ‘actors’ on that OTHER franchise, are awful actors.
Jesus, Heather needs laid. She hits on both the ‘captain’ (who is not all that, AT ALL, not to mention he’s white) and the chick taking drink orders.
So once on the boat, Jen does succumb to wanting the orchestra to take it away on her behalf, and claims she doesn’t get Angie’s ‘angle’ (was she not listening, disrespect and lack of gratitude was kind of the ‘angle.’) and why would she EVER ask her to just host a party at someone’s house.
Think Angie is acknowledging she offered it, however didn’t initially realize she was paying for every last fucking drop of alcohol and morsel of food with Jen not offering to pay one penny.
Meredith looks like she wants to say this but for some reason stares awkwardly into space, tuning her out,n because she knows Jen took advantage of someone’s friendship and generosity, which let’s face it, is her area of expertise, and had no problem doing it, until she got called out. Now she has a shit ton of contradictory excuses.
Now Jen seems to not be able to contain herself to Meredith, and she has opted for the fake pity party,
“You have come at me at my most vulnerable time, fuck you Angie, jump out of the boat and swim back to shore bitch.” As she is totally unraveling and further embarrassing herself by ‘bragging’ about how many connections they have, and could have hosted it at something something stadium. (assuming the college where Coach is employed – yeah sure they would TOTALLY allowed that, Jen what with your criminal activities and all…) Everyone hearing this knows, yes she could have had the venue elsewhere, however, Angie’s home appealed to her due to the ‘free ride’ aspect of it. No one will say this. Mrs. Roper continues to ramble on.
