So quick obsi about the tag lines this season – they’re really bad. Like really, really bad.

Please stop, Heather, your acting career was a failure. Maybe you’re just not that good of an actress.

Last season was a testament to that.

It’s not for lack of trying, but Meryl Streep you are not. Remember that beyond horribly over dramatic scene when she screamed at Shannon over the titty gate. She actually looked embarrassed at the reunion when it she was asked about it. She should have been.

******

On to the closing of Cut, in which Tamra is having a party to celebrate. Can’t wrap my head around that, but to each their own.

New Jenn fills in Tamra on the shit that she was saying to Shannon on the Flamingo Boat, which she doesn’t even remember. But WE do remember that she was ridiculing Shannon for being a drunk, as she needs told the things that she said to her, because she was Blacked. Out. Drunk. But who are we to ‘judge?’ Tamra uses the typical girl excuse, that she didn’t eat all day. I would expect Tamra to be more creative.

New Jenn urges her to apologize to Shannon. Not sure how great of a friend she is to New Jenn. But this is Housewives and they’re not paid to be friendly.

******

Gina. Gina. Gina. Taking her Real Estate exam, and she sounds dumber than a rock as she tries to answer questions.

She and Travis are getting into Real Estate togetherrrrrrrrrrr. She’s going to go into bougie homes and sell them to peopllllllllllle. Is she going to talk to clients in her 2005 nasly voiccccccccccce??

Let’s hope not.

Okay so I’m taking bets on what an epic failure this is going to be.

She couldn’t even answer correctly a really basic questionnnnnnnnnnnnnn. The answer was obviously ‘discouraged.’ ‘Prohibited’ to not return a phone call? Really?? Like how exactly would that be enforced?

Can I call my life line??

So a little OC birdie may or may not have told me something in reference to Gina. You may recall hearing that she was getting axed after last season.

But then Production decided, with the addition of New Jenn, that Gina could be the sort of ring leader of picking on Jenn about her affair with Ryan. With Emily as back-up of course.

It all makes sense, as you see her going for New Jenn and pulling out the good old ‘triggering’ as an excuse.

She gets the next obvious answer correct. If these are really questions on the real estate license exam, then no wonder there are so many idiotic Realtors. She seems proud of herself for knowing that they can’t deposit clients’ down payments in their personal account.

******

It’s so hard listening to Shannon say that she and John “are in a good place.” She also does point out that he needs frequent breaks.

Tamra calls her and apologizes for being in a drunken stupor and all of the nasty things that she said, and wants to move forward. For reals this time. Shannon agrees to go to her Closing The Gym celebration.

******

I can’t listen to Emily ‘complain’ anymore. I don’t even care what she is saying. Her mom doesn’t want to talk to her anymore perhaps because she’s a pretentious evil bitch.

******

Taylor’s face is weird. Why don’t they leave their faces alone? Heather drops by to help her with her acting. Taylor is in some movie, being filmed in Oklahoma, which I’m finding hard to believe, both parts of that.

She asked Heather to be a part of it when they were drinking on the boat. Heather was all “sure I’m in!” Now Heather is like “yeah, no.”

This isn’t good enough for Heather DuBratt, the failed actress, who has so much else going on.

******

The Gym Closing event is getting underway.

Gina expected Ryan to be taller, “because he’s been talked about so much” she says in her yap, which makes no sense. It’s a very Gina statement. She cracks herself up with that one. I don’t think anyone else was laughing. I guess it would be funny if the dude was like extremely short, but he’s not.

That was funny, right ?? He’s not tall. Get it?

Tamra, Taylor and New Jenn have the exact same hair. Exactly.

Love what you’ve done with your hair!

I think Emily outweighs poor Shane by about fifty or sixty pounds.

I’m not surprised about Tamra’s son Ryan’s new cowboy hick look. It sort of suits him. Just surprised to hear that there’s a ranch right up the road, in Orange County.

And this gives Tamra the idea for a ‘girls trip’ to Montana. Can’t wait for all of the predicatble intagating and yelling.

Shannon arrives, and Tamra embraces her and apologizes. Not sure how receptive Shannon is to it.

Something seems off with Tamra acting so apologetic. Something is up. Not coming off as sincere to me,

I’m sorry I really am, and it’s no joke. It’s not an act.

Shannon wants more of an apology, for the other things that she’s pissed about.

So Gina is doing her Housewife job, very similar to last season, and what she did with Shannon, when she just had to tell Heather about titty gate.

Claiming her ratting out is all in the name of being all self-righteous, and this dire need to be doing what is ‘right.’ Please.

Apparently Jenn made a tiktok video bragging about her yoga studio still being opened, and seems as if she’s mocking Tamra.

I always stand and talk like this.

Gina passive aggressively attacks Jenn about the post. Jenn seems blindsided, and defends the post, admitting the timing was bad, and meant no shade towards Tamra.

They tell me I’m supposed to bully you about cheating, so here I am!

Tamra didn’t seem that mad, but Gina is letting New Jenn know what the deal is, and what to expect. Emily drills New Jenn about her ex, and what transpired with Ryan.

She wants the EXACT timeline.

Had you slept with Ryan when your husband went to Oklahoma??”

Not your business Emily. She denies it.

Do you need to see pictures, bitch??

I don’t like the cheating, and people who were cheated on, normally don’t respect cheaters.

Gina claims it’s ‘triggering’ her. Instead of just saying it’s bugging her. We have to say triggering, which has really become entitlement to act any way you want.

I can see it causing her to lose respect for Jenn, but she needs to not make it about her.

Emily is excited for the cake cutting, (again – this is so strange – even a cake to celebrate the failure of our business) then really upset when they start slinging it at each other.

I literally just came here for cake!

She manages to get a few bites.

This was on the floor but I don’t care! Two second rule!

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