“I have a new king but I’m still the queen of New Jersey” Worst, tackiest, most ridiculous tag line ever, with the exception of the first season of NYC. A new “king??” Jesus, I have a feeling that has gone to his head.
‘Frank still hasn’t finished the house.’ I have a feeling this is now a “story line.” A very boring stupid story line. The kids are now with Dolores in “the townhouse.” I was wondering why they weren’t living with her last week, if the house is so unliveable. The whole thing is dumb.
I’m so confused about this situation. Dolores lost me about Frank living here, not living there – shore house… blah blah. David —Blah Blah.
Who cares.
Does Melissa still have the boutique ? Just wondered that, with this scene of Gia shooting pics for her sweatshirts from “Waking up in the Morning” thing. This is what she meant by her ‘fashion line’ last week.
Teresa, Gia and Milania talking about having a get together at Louie’s with Joe, and Milania doesn’t want to go. She still acts the same as she did when she was two.
The bro’s go out on a lunch date, and they order a round of espressos, and big burly Frank for real, orders an apple martini. Like 2000 called, and they want their drink back. I can’t believe none of the guys made fun of him.
Then he starts crying like a bitch about the renos and how the kids are mad at him for not getting the shit done. They should be mad. Get ‘er done slacker. Drink your girlie appletini, stop crying and finish the job.
I was reading on Twitter that the Jersey House Husbands are the only “paid husbands” out of all of the franchises. I guess Joe, and the rest are featured a lot more on Jersey. I never really noticed that much. I try to NOT pay attention to them.
Evan and Jackie go out, and she is not eating of course. She starts on her eating issues. Of course her kids notice that all she eats is salad. She’s going to see a therapist about it. Like she has a legit eating disorder. She’s never talked to someone about it? Well it is time.
Melissa does have Envy still. I thought she did, but she she hasn’t talked about it since this season started. Or anything really. Just a lot of hair fluffing and tossing.
Jackie calls Jennifer. She doesn’t think that Dolores has been a good friend to her. She tells her about her college kegger party or whatever thing she’s having.
Teresa and Gabrielle arrive at Luis’. I do feel like Luis has some issues , however he works on himself with these self help techniques, to keep whatever his issues are under control. So good for him. Perhaps he recognized that he was making the same mistakes over and over in his relationships, and decided to own it and do something about it. Instead of blaming everyone else.
Just from seeing the clip from the retreat thing at the beach, and his apologies to his then-girlfriend for being a selfish prick, I think I might just have a good idea. He’s a selfish prick.
There are several pineapples at Luis…
Teresa starts on you know what. Jesus – shut the fuck up !!!!!!
Luis wants to do this thing where you write down one thing you want to bring to your life and one thing you want to let go of. They decide to not write anything, and just discuss it in the open.
Melissa makes fun of Teresa in her interview, because Teresa basically says there is nothing she needs to work on.
Melissa says if Louie wants her to admit she’s wrong, they will probably be here all night. Funny and true. She looked like she almost hurt herself trying to think of something to say.
I hate to admit I’m taking Teresa’s side, but when she said to Melissa – “you could have invited us over for dinner.” I get that. Especially when Melissa said she wants to spend more time with the family. The girls are bitching about Joe ignoring them and not making an effort, so Melissa, sorry I know it’s old fashioned, but as the lady of the house, the one in charge of “entertainment” you could have thought to invite Teresa and the girls over. But that wouldn’t occur to Melissa, because it’s not “her” family. I can kind of relate to that feeling too. I have a brother that is married, and there’s his kids her kids, our kids type of situation. They have big get-togethers basically every holiday, (summer, fall, winter, all of them) and never once have they invited my sister and I. Like why isn’t my sister-in-law saying “do you want to invite your sisters?” like not even once. It’s so ridiculous, and I can’t make my brother understand how this is hurtful. It just seems like with brothers, they forget they have a family when they get married. Enough about me.
Joe is talking about Guidice jail drama. Joe says he should be able to say “whatever he wants. and five minutes later, let it go, because we’re family.” Well not exactly Joe Gorga. Spoken like a dude, that’s for sure. Gia and Milania are rolling their eyes.
Joe says ‘let’s just let go of the past.’ He gets nods.
They’re getting ready for the kegger part — ayy !! Jennifer has decided to attend.
Tiki is ironing his own fucking shirt. I love that. I hate to iron, and I’m so bad at it. It’s the worst household job ever. I would literally rather clean toilets than iron.
Evan just looks — guilty to me. Is that in my head ? I thought so last year too, when Teresa repeated this rumor. (but remember it was okay because it was ‘only a rumor’) I really think he did have a girlfriend. I stick by it.
Dolores arrives to the party with Frank of course. They’re so weird.
What’s weirder is that they’re now discussing Joe’s dick size. Margaret says that Dolores told him that Joe’s dick is really big. She probably knows because they’re always talking about his dick.
Subject moves from Joe’s dick to Jennifer Aydin and her husband’s affair. Oddly enough, I’m glad.
Margaret is being such a dick, and says you can’t cry at 44 years old ? What ? This woman can’t be upset because an affair was brought up from ten years ago other that has been suppressed and never dealt with ?
New chick Traci tells everyone they need to be more empathetic and stop being such mean girls and try to maybe get where she is coming from, and why this would be hurtful. Margaret doesn’t care.
Does Melissa ever stop fluffing her hair ?
Tiki talks to Bill, and he says his ‘skeleton came out of the closet.’ Yep it did. The bony guy flew right out, at Teresa’s party, and said, “hello, here I am!” I banged my Pharm Rep ! (as opposed to office manager”) Tiki, I guess can relate to this scenario, since he was cheating on HIS pregnant wife, with his current wife.
Keep it in your pants dude. Banging a random chick for two years while your wife is home with three kids, and a fourth on the way ?? Gross.
Dolores is asked about David, and of course, we knew this was coming. They broke up. The ladies are eating it up. They wanna “I told you so” so bad. And probably throw in her face how all last year she kept saying “Oh my God I’m so happy with David!” She insists he’s upset about it. He’s not upset about it.
Jennifer hasn’t spoken to anyone and is nervously sucking water through a straw. Think it’s good she’s doing water.
Jennifer spills that Jackie says that Dolores isn’t a good friend to her. Whatever. This is going to get dumb(er.)
Margaret comes over and there’s squabbling about who’s the bestest most awesomest friend to whom ?? Jesus. Mean Girls again. Regina and the gang are in Jersey now.
Dolores goes all gangsta on Jackie and it’s really really weird.
For the love of God – She even goes with the “what are you gonna do about it??” when Jackie says “don’t call me THIS!!!!
Circa Erika Jayne, August 2021. Wow. Can we try to be a little original ? Erika may have had the snaky hiss perfected, but Gangsta Dolores from Jersey is a little more believable than gangsta Barbie Erika from Georgia.
‘To Be Continued…’
