Sorry but this thing with Lisa, saying she’s acting a fucking fool because she’s “grieving” (never in my life have I ever came across anyone that ‘grieves’ like that – have YOU?) Whatever.
We know it’s made up and ridiculous of course. But equally as ridiculous was everyone’s reaction to it. My God, the fawning and petting the blubbering, and even zero emotion Scarika dabbing her with a tissue? Give me a fucking break already. I realize they had no choice, but to eat it all up and baby her, or else it would have came off as unsympathetic about Lois, and Rinna is the ringleader of the mean girls, so there’s that reason also, but it was a LITTLE over the top, was it not???
Why the hell are Sutton and Crystal hugging? Someone says it was Melissa Etheridge’s performance that made Rinna stop fucking screaming and straight into crying about her mom. That she didn’t even bother to hold a service for.
Moving on to something also annoying. We’re exactly 1 minute, 40 seconds in and I’m already irked.
A birthday cake presentation for Vyle, She looks like she was expecting it. Although she did sort of a fake surprise thing. It wasn’t her usual mouth gaping open, head tilt, ‘shocked’ impersonation though. She probably couldn’t wait for Rinna to get done fake crying over poor Lois, so the attention could be on her. They sing happy birthday to her. Kathy says “now what?” She’s bored. She wants male strippers or something. Not sure she was too impressed with Melissa Etheridge, or even knew who she was.
The guys are outside trying so damned hard to be interesting and impress each other. PK has to try extra hard because he’s you know, PK. So he says some shit that he thinks sounds good, that he’s “reversing (? I have a hard time understanding him) into a New York stock exchange, public company with my new real estate business, which is crypto – based block chain.” Huh?
I don’t think he has ANY fucking idea what he just said. He was hoping no one would question him. But someone does, and he answers, “it’s too complicated, if I told ya, I’d have to kill ya.”
He is literally trying to act like he doesn’t just loaf around, gamble all day, and set up fake robberies. Mario (that’s what I’m calling him) now. I can’t with Mo shit, says “you guys have zero interesting things going on…”
Mario is ridiculing him, because he knows he’s talking out his asshole. PK refers to himself as an exceptional genius or some shit. Make this stop. Old dudes trying too hard to appear cool is excruciating to watch. PK, just go back to ogling Erika. At least that was plausible.
Back inside to the ladies, an equally as large bag of wind, Rinna is claiming her argument with Sutton about tomato sauce is what “triggered it.”
She should know what this ‘triggering’ thing is all about by now. It’s a part of Housewife every day vocabulary now. Isn’t the reaction supposed to be related somehow, to the discussion? It wasn’t She has ‘trigger’ mixed up with ‘excuse.’ Which is not the first time a housewife has done that, but this one is the most comical.
The two charity chicks are starting to look like statues or cardboard cut outs or something, as they stare in disbelief at them. Is it just me or did their expression never change every time the cameras went to them. The looked extremely engrossed int his conversation to say the least. Cameras land on Nadia, Dr Saleh’s wife again, and she also has the same expression, as she did during the screaming.
I’m sure she’s thinking is this tired old hag seriously using her 95 year old’s mother’s death for an excuse for this shit?
Rinna is still talking muttering some crap that there is something else going on deeper.
Kyle questions “what is the deeper stuff?”
Garcelle sees these two charity ladies’ faces which is now pure disgust, and tells them “you guys can get up.” (or, get lost, stop fucking listening to our conversation) The one on the right looks at her like she’s contemplating how she’s going to butcher her limbs off.
Dorit picks up on the abruptness of that comment from Garcelle. Dorit was probably seeing the looks of horror on their faces, at being dismissed, and tells them “don’t feel like you NEED to go.”
Does one of them say they’re having dessert? I don’t know. They don’t look like they need dessert. I think they stay seated, but Nadia, the dentist’s wife, immediately gets up, and gets the hell out of there. That was funny.
Crystal has the floor about her fake eating disorder. The charity ladies are gonna LOVE this, as the sit there eating their cake. Now they probably will leave. She assures them that she has been consulting with ‘help’ for it since she was a teenager. Kyle wonders if it’s the “right people.” Crystal claims shehas spent “hoooouuuuurs today interviewing different people.” Yeah that sounds like a lie. Sorry! I just don’t think she has an eating disorder! It’s my opinion. I could be wrong. Sometimes I’m wrong. Most of the time, I’m not.
Garcelle says “anything else we need to clear up?” It’s Sutton’s turn now, in this pre-planned weird convo, that keeps getting worse.
Sutton says she “had a rough day on Saturday, she didn’t really like being called a friend with liabilities.” And she brings up Erika’s law suits, and says that an attorney contacted her about one of Erika and Tom’s suits thinking she “knew something.”
I don’t know why she’s going here right now, she’s knows how Erika gets. They flash to the reunion where Sutton disclosed that she knew an attorney that “left there due to shady practices.”
And true to form, Erika freaks the fuck out and goes from zero to ghetto in like two seconds, with the toothy snarl, and yells “you said that shit, they’re gonna ask you what was that??”
Sutton says Erika has a lot of law suits in front of her.
Is she trying to get punched in the head or what? She’s trying to making the point that if anyone is a ‘liability’ it’s this fucking broad. I think all of the viewers were thinking when she uttered that to Garcelle, right?? Like of all the words to use for someone being sued by like half the country?
Dorito tries to say that she was the “only one questioning Erika. ” Garcelle immediately says “she wasn’t the only one.” She repeats it to make sure they got it. Dorito tried to ignore it, which is the norm for when Garcelle speaks.
Dorito didn’t challenge that comment, so something must have jarred her memory, and was like oh yeah I remember us all asking questions. She tried. Dumbass. Bless her heart.
They flash to several others also asking her various questions last season. It gets dropped.
Diana in her infinite wisdom, (NOT!) thinks this two seconds of silence, who was paying no attention to the conversation, just suddenly remembered her assignment to come for Garcelle. Randomly, she says to Garcelle “I feel like out of the all the women here, you’re the most guarded one.” If by guarded you mean, she can’t fucking stand you, then yes you’re right. Garcelle wonders, “how did we get from liabilities to lawyers to me?” She doesn’t know, she just heard you talking, Garcelle.
She says “that’s where we started, no??” No Diana, they were talking about Erika’s multitude of law suits. But sure, sounds close to Garcelle being ‘guarded’ – whatever the fuck that means.
Garcelle gives her this smirky smile thing, and says “what do you want to know, Diana?” She knows it’s a rhetorical question. DIana doesn’t care. She sees she’s just completing her assignment, as the viewers do too. Bravo needs to back off and let these ladies argue on their own.
Erika is I’m sure, glad the numbskull changed the subject. Maybe the ring leaders just told her, any time someone talks about Erika’s pathetic life, change the subject.
Diana goes on making no sense. “I really really like you but I feel like for your friendship I had to work extra hard and I get nowhere.” (did they not smooth thing over after her stupid Christmas party) Garcelle even pretended to go along with it, accepted her apology from her strange assignment-driven behavior at her birthday, just to shut her up. But here we are. Nothing else to talk about I guess. Diana is Rinna’s puppet right now. You would think Diana would be too ‘assertive’ to tolerate anyone pulling her strings like this.
Diana’s big comeback, complete with the licking of her entire chin, is “But I haven’t seen you since.” Diana looks down and smirks. Garcelle calls bullshit on the whole thing in her yap, and says “Google me.” That’s what she should have said there.
Rinna who was in on this, most likely, says “Do you hear her? Do you hear where she’s coming from?” As if this asshole cares. She’s all fucking serious and dramatic, as if this is serious and dramatic. Garcelle snickers.
I like Garcelle, but really starting to feel like she needs to be done with this shit. She should just bail after this season. Doesn’t she have bigger and better things to do?
Rinna claims that Diana sounds like she’s in pain over this. And literally, I hope you all didn’t miss it but you may have. I stop and start a lot, Diana is looking in her lap and snickering. I just can’t.
Diana comes up with “I would like to know you better differently” whateverrrrrr the fuck that even means. Garcelle pretend agrees. Sarcastically agreeing with a weirdo you both know makes no sense, is the best way to shut her up. And it works. Diana is so dumb, she’s not even picking up on the sarcasm. Do they not speak sarcasm in Bosnia? Probably not. You just get head butted there when you misbehave. Rinna is looking down. Are they looking at fucking note cards for what they’re supposed to say or what?
Who else would like Diana to take a long fucking walk off of a short pier into water full of jelly fish? or sharks. Jelly fish or sharks. Either one will do.
Cuz im not kidding, it’s starting to really look that way. Either that, or she was just completely zoning out. She even looks startled when Garcelle says, “so what do you think of that Rinna? She thought her task was complete. Guess she thought Diana and Garcelle would argue further about it. Who knows.
But Garcelle managed to shut her the hell down without snarling or throwing anything at anyone.
Rinna already checked out she seems startled when Garcelle says her name. I think she has the attention span of your average three-year old. Erika is looking over at her, like “get with the fucking program you twit!”
Garcelle does a funny lean in to hear her, thing when she doesn’t answer, because she literally is trying to think of what to say. She has no idea what just transpired one minute ago. Bravo! To editing for leaving this shit in. Erika and Diana anxiously await what will come out of her pie hole.
She says “I feel good about it but why do you have to say it like that?” She thinks Garcelle is being defensive or some shit, and yacks about “coming from a place of love…” Whatever Rinna.
Garcelle counters with, “you’re telling meeeee about coming from LOVE?”
Kyle smirks over at Rinna, and ridicules her in her yap, and she really should have said it in the moment, for saying ‘place of love’ when she was just screaming her head off. “Practice what you preach” she says. But was afraid to say it to her for real.
Garcelle wonders why no one can say she’s right, or agree with her. Kathy quickly says she agrees with her, but comes off kind of disingenuous. Like she’s joking. Rinna looks kind of defeated.
Kyle, in an effort to ‘side with Garcelle’ but not really, because she has to have her tongue in Rinna’s, Erika’s and Diana’s YOU KNOW WHAT (one of the you -know-what’s, or both) so also sounding very disingenuous, says “I don’t know what’s happening (plays dumb, not a stretch) but I support Garcelle.”
You’re hilarious Kyle, I think you missed your calling in life. Oh that’s right, you did try and failed.
Crystal and Rob at home drinking wine scene. She immediately starts talking about WHAT ELSE, triggering and ‘eating disorder.’ She’s clearly setting up her ‘story line’ for next season and will be taking Erika down for the chicken tender comment. She pretends to be annoyed that “the girls are talking about it.”
Rob inquires, “why would the girls be talking about it?” This dude has no clue what is going on, or not going on with his wife. Crystal: “Well, I posted about it” Yes, There’s that minor detail. Inviting everyone on the globe to talk about it, and ask about things that don’t add up.
‘Body image struggles’ my ass. Can I remind everyone of how she’s been dressing, and some of her behavior this season? Can I tell you what I think. I think she just hates being so tall. Asian women are usually really petite, and I think it bothers her that she’s 5’10.” You can tell when some of the ladies have commented on her height. That’s my observation. And I’m just going to leave it there.
Perhaps, yes, she does wish she was a little skinnier, (don’t we all) even though she’s hardly overweight. Do I think it’s a true ‘eating disorder’ and body dysmorphia issue? Most women, who care about their appearance, have body dysmorphia, or a clouded body image, to some extent. It’s always been my joke that girls fly out of the uterus saying “Oh my God, will you just LOOK at these thighs!”
I think she’s your average chick that cares too much about her appearance, and is a product of the belief that women have to be perfect. It’s not an eating disorder. Surely viewers that actually suffer with ED’s have to be seeing through this shit. If you watch Jersey, yes Jackie does indeed, have an eating disorder. She looked like a skeleton in her wedding photos.
Not sure why Jackie’s husband waited so long to address it with her. My theory was that, it finally was affecting HIM, since their kids were older now, and was seeing how it was holding her back form doing certain things, therefore holding HIM back from doing certain things. (vacations, trying new restaurants…) Rob tells her he was “surprised too that she posted about it.” Another kind of demonstration that it’s a big old embellishment.
So this unfortunately, goes on. She whines that the group wants her to ‘get help.’ Crystal, whateverrrr, come ON, girl. You’re not a dummy. You’re not that smart, but you’re not a complete idiot. ‘Get help’ is the first fucking thing that people say anytime you share you’re struggling with anything.
Especially an ‘eating disorder.’ Because when people do ACTUALLY have them, they are serious. She doesn’t want to ‘get help’ because a therapist that specializes in this field will immediately know she’s faking. She makes it out that they’re coercing her into talking with someone. So what was all of her,
“I spent all day interviewing therapists.” Fucking bullshit. See, she just loses her credibility. That’s why I don’t believe her.
Fake fucking crying. Rob hugs her. I wonder if he really even believes this. He probably does. He has no clue about ‘eating disorders.’
Sad part is, I think SHE really believes this. She has herself convinced. Rob is so awkward and confused. He knows he needs to play along. He says “let’s drink to it.” Was there a resolution there? Other than proving further she has no eating disorder.
Kathy Hilton randomly arrives. Seems to be no knock or door bell, she just walks in like, “helloooo?” So I was a l ittle confused by this, then I was seeing on SM that Crystal already knew her, prior to knowing Kyle? Through Rob or what? I don’t know.
Not sure about the extreme hunger thing when she arrives. She seems kind of sweaty, disheveled and out of breath when she arrives? What was she doing? Running around a track in her table cloth top??
Did she walk there? (I have a dress like this so not being rude about her top) It does look kind of like a table cloth though. I got my dress for my tiktok videos. I thought it would be ‘summery.’
There was a lot of Twitter activity last week over this scene, about how funny it was. Kathy was being given her usual accolades for being so ‘ funny and relatable.’ Honestly, though, when they offered her wine upon arrival and she declined, they should have said “can I get you anything else?” Not trying to sound like the hostessing police, but it’s just 101 in having someone who arrives to your house, even casually.
And right off the bat, we talk about the so-called ED. Right off the bat, Kathy tells her she shouldn’t have to answer questions about it, and “it’s between me myself and I.” That’s a very 30 years ago expression. Haven’t hear it in forever. That all sounds well and good Kath, except for one small detail,
SHE POSTED A BOOK REPORT ABOUT IT ON INSTA!!!
Therefore she opened it up for discussion, and clearly wanted people to know and ask her about it !!
Kathy consoles her and tells her not to let the girls bully her into doing something she doesn’t want to do. It’s all so contradictory. If she’s ‘struggling’ supposedly, why would she not want to get help. She has the money and resources for the best of the best. But after she blasted it on SM, now she doesn’t want to talk about it, or get help for it. IT SOUNDS PRETTY FUCKING FISHY.
Okay so since clearly, Kathy just ran around the block before she arrived, she’ s starving. After her wisdom delivery, about something she knows nothing about, she requests “a cracker.” They look at her like she’s insane, as if they’re sure if she’s kidding. (since they were just talking about having an eating disorder) She confesses to being “a little hungry.” Actually she looks ready to pass out. So ironic, as she consoles someone about their fake eating disorder, she requests to be immediately fed. They then trip all over themselves to provide snacks, sort of.
Crystal just literally hands her an unopened box of crackers from a basket that “they just got delivered today.” Crystal open the fucking thing and put them on a plate. She even has to request a napkin, and a beverage for crissakes. They weren’t going to offer her a beverage to wash down cheese and crackers? Rob says “you come over and we feed you.” Yes like you’re supposed to with a guest.
Did you guys see the name of the crackers? The box says “Lady.” Remember her ‘the lady’ thing last season? Speaking of which, where is the ‘The Lady’ today? Guess she didn’t feed her royal highness today. Cracks me up that she had to request a beverage. Yeah girlfriend needs something to was the crackers down with, Crystal!! this isn’t hard.
That was funny. Probably the only ‘real’ part of the entire episode. I think the visit was contrived so Crystal could whine to her, but think her, “I need a cracker!!!! ” ,thing was real.
On to not a very ‘real’ scene. Kyle’s birthday – she shows Mario her sparkly champagne bottle from Garcelle. I wouldn’t have spent six fucking cents on this wench if I were Garcelle. Whatever. His standard robotic response, “that’s beautifullll.” He didn’t even look at it. I never heard a dude say ‘beautiful’ so much. Is it from having all daughters perhaps? Still weird. Does anyone else feel like he can’t stand Kyle? I do. He tries really hard to hide it.
He tells her she looks ‘beautiful’ in a robotic way. So he uses the same adjective that he used to describe a bottle of champagne that he didn’t really even look at. Oh, and also to describe the roller skates her daughter got for her.
So he literally said “so beautiful” three times in like one minute. I feel like he’s just on auto pilot at this point. He would call a pile of dog shit “so beautiful!!” if Kyle pointed it out. I don’t think he even listens to her.
She name drops ‘Kris Jenner’ who also got her flowers. And guess what Mario says??? “They’re so beautiful !!”
This ‘Smokey’ dog of Kyle’s is so cute! I c ould watch him and her other one snuggle and play all day. I would even prefer it over this fake shit.
So she puts on the skates and YAWWWWWWNNNN, here we go in her yap, More name droppingggggggggg.
“Kids from Diff’rent Stokes, Fact of Life, the Jackson family…” where they used to skate, and compete and she would always win, and she was so good at it, blah blah blah Kyle. I love how they flash a pic of Kim, not Kylewith the Diff’rent Strokes kids. “It was her favorite thing to do, and she was really good at it.” Okay got it. She probably auditioned for Facts of Life, and didn’t get anything because she sucks.
Kyle is so extra in this scene, as usual. Farrah looks, nor acts anything like Kyle.
Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb meet for lunch. Erika tries to make a joke with the host dude about not pulling out HER chair, but she’s so fucking dry, he does not see humor, and wants to rip her head off, as he pulls out her fucking chair.
Again we use Lois’ death as a story line. She refers to her bad performance as a ‘break down’ at Dorit’s. She refers, again, to Sutton as the ‘trigger.’ She needs to look up about this ‘triggering’ thing.
It doesn’t make any sense to blame Sutton for this. Erika does a weird laugh as if she can ‘relate’ to Sutton being a ‘trigger.’ Again she says “it’s what triggers me.” Oh my god. Clearly they came to gossip about Sutton. “Why did she choose to say that about you in that moment??” Erika asks. Or Rinna. Either or, who cares. They’re basically the same fucking moron at this point.
I don’t know, can I ask, why did Erika CHOOSE to bring up the stupid spaghetti feud at the wine party why did Rinna CHOOSE to scream like a psycho ??
Why did Erika ‘choose’ to call Sutton a ‘liability’ to Garcelle??
Why did your weird servant assholestupid Sanela Dijana ‘choose’ to call Garcelle “guarded” and pretend that she’s sad they’re not friends ‘in that moment.’
Why did Sanela Dijana CHOOSE to cause a big fucking scene at Garcelle’s birthday party?
Now Kyle and Sutton meet. It’s a weird convo, shocker. Sutton shares she has a date later. Kyle sort of shames poor/middle class people by telling her to “look poor” by not wearing extravagant jewelry. She tells her she needs to come off as “needing a man” to take care of her. That’s ‘Big Kathy’s’ influence right there, her gold digging, town tramp mother.
I love when they show the outside of Erika’s ‘condo’ in comparison to the other houses. I’m sorry but it gives me so much joy.
So we have a 70’s disco party for rinna’s fucking lip crap. Rinna is being a dick to these girls that are forced to be masked standing at the bar thing. Not sure what their deal is. She asks them if they’re “real bartenders” I guess they’re not, but I don’t know what the fuck they said with those icky mouth diapers on.
Rinna’s wig looks stupid. This doesn’t look like 70’s hair to me. 70’s disco era hair was straight with the weird curling iron curls on the sides. I know, because I was in 6th grade, and trying to be really hip and trendy, and annoyed my hair was poofy and wavy, and couldn’t achieve the look the rest of the girls were getting with the flat hair, and curling iron thing.
That wig looks ridiculous and hot and uncomfortable as fuck.
She’s yammering about fucking lemons. Can someone freeze a few, and throw them at her head? (Just kiddin!) sort of.
All of the ladies have big curly hair, and that is NOT DISCO era. Garcelle with the afro, I get. The others are confused, trying to have afros. Do they know they’re white? This photo shoot thing is a fucking shit show. What a bunch of egotistical self-absorbed women?? It’s supposed to be FOR FUN!
Dorito is taking it sooooo seriously, and it’s literally a picture in a ‘photo booth’ type thing, It’s not fucking Vogue. Garcelle was actually in Vogue, maybe that’s why she thinks you all are being ridiculous as fucking fuck.
Kyle invites the girls to her house in Aspen and yeah for real we have to listen to Sanela Dijana about her fucking hotel protocol bullshit. WE KNOW !!
I’m going to call her that from now on. That’s her name. Diana is a fake name. If she chooses to go by her middle name, it’s actually pronounced DeeAnna, as I learned when I looked it up. She’s so proud of being Bosnian with the ‘head butting’ and all, why not go by her real name?
So there’s some dancing, and fun, and we know this will be short-lived.
I hate to say it but Sanela Dijana’s hair is the only one that looks Disco era 70’s.
Kathy scolds Kyle for eating (filling her trout) when they are to be “going out later.”
Kyle dismisses her because there is Housewife havoc to be wreaked right now. Kathy, get with the program already! Are you new here? No you’re not. That was your excuse last season.
We start the fucking ‘liability’ talk. Crystal looks uncomfortable as Dorito starts yammering about Sutton pointing out Erka’s law suits, being below the belt. That was a type-o, but I’m keeping it. Erka. I like that for her.
So apparently this party is again, solely to ‘go after’ Sutton. Kathy calls the charity “Toothless and Homeless” and Dortio scolds her and corrects her. Now Garcelle gets singled out by Dorito for laughing when they’re all laughing. Dorito is a racist fuck.. And I don’t throw that word around. I don’t, unless I really think a black or minority person is being treated differently. Everything that Garcelle does around women is the biggest fucking deal ever, even though she’s doing the same fucking shit the rest of them are doing, except that she’s not as vile and demented the rest of them are.
Why not scold Kathy who actually referred to incorrectly? No, she singles out Garcelle for laughing about it. Stupid Vyle tries to get on a soapbox about it, and says it wrong also.
The producers question her in her yap and she’s still too dumb to figure it out. Why would it be ‘Toothless not Homeless’ Kyle you fucktard, when they are actual Homeless people?? It’s not like these rich assholes that are looking for a pat on the back, are actually going to take these dirty smelly homeless people into their bougie fucking homes. They don’t care THAT much. This isn’t hard. Just like Mario’s dick when you get in bed with him. Now if was with Dorito, that’s a different story. (You’ve all heard the rumors, right?)
Kathy goes on to ridicule the organization by saying “I have worked with Homeless, I have worked with the Toothless.” I’m assuming she was ridiculing anyway. Nada out of Dorito’s face about it. But Garcellllle, don’t YOU dare laugh? Who doesn’t see this???
So yeah we’re revisiting this Sutton thing again after Rinna apologized for lashing out and used poor Lois as an excuse. Rinna has a fake bitchy weird ass look on her face.
Sutton is trying to say something and it’s just getting lost. Again she blames herself for everything.
Erka picks a fight with Garcelle about her drinking issue. She says it seems like she had some ulterior motive in discussing Erka’s drinking. Dorito is understanding the assignment, doing some weird look with her arms crossed, trying to look as cranky and ugly as Rinna. I’ll tell yeah, this one and OC are almost unbearable with the way these bitches act. Like it’s so weird how some of them mimmick each other, and ‘go after’ a targeted person or people.
Kathy sort of whispers to Garcelle, further ridiculing the charity, and saying “Toothless not Homeless, Homeless not Toothless, does it really matter??”
But Kathy is allowed to say it, Garcelle is not. At the reunion, I wonder if Andy will play this scene and sit there mute as Dorito again scolds Garcelle for laughing. Probably.
