What a debacle this matchmaking cruise turned out to be.
Maybe if the dude wasn’t such a weirdo, it could have been fun and successful.
The guy, while clearly has money (or just a lot of debt. Let’s not be fooled, not all that glitters is gold) seems to be awkward around women. Hence why he’s trying to impress them with a yacht in the Mediterranean.
I’m already sick of Joe. Both Joe’s actually.
I love when Aesha says “geels geels.” Also how she says ‘dick’ for deck.
Sandy notices Nate being a little too lax since his ‘best good friend’ came on board.
The matchmaker asks Joe to narrow the choices to two, and send the rest home.
He still seemed somewhat interested in that Anna chick, whose personality is an absolute nightmare. And she’s making no effort to hide it.
With the two that he picks to stay, he definitely has a type right?
He gets summoned by Alicia, or Ashleigh. Alicia. Even their names are similar. She does appear to be, or at least is good at pretending, to be interested in this guy.
I find him a little disheveled and skeevy, but I have to say he does not come off as a complete arrogant asshole. They kiss. Ashleigh and Anna eavesdrop from the upper deck. Ashleigh says she’s going to ‘steal him.’ Why?
Joe takes a very extended break, then tells Nate he was working.
Ashleigh or Alicia and Joe are having an awkward breakfast together, as they wait for the others. I honestly can’t tell them apart. I think it’s Alicia.
With Nate eating his Cocoa Krispies, Joe walking around aimlessly and I guess Max was on break too, there’s no one on deck. Sandy is not happy.
Nate did tell Joe to stay on deck while he went to eat. He refuses to point that out to Sandy since that’s his good buddy.
Matchmaker Amy makes Joe tell Nightmare Weirdo Anna and Mariely that he doesn’t like them. I honestly haven’t even seen Anna say two words to him.
Cathy notices what looks like makeup on Joe’s pillow. Ashleigh did say she was going to ‘steal him.’ So I guess she did?? Unless he wears foundation, and it really wouldn’t shock me.
Sandy reprimands Nate about not making sure his guys were doing their fucking jobs while he was partaking in Cocoa Puffs.
I hate to side with Captain Creeper, (guess I can officially stop calling her that since she’s hung up her creeping shoes) but she is right.
However if this were the interior that was so lax, and all three of them were sitting in crew mess when guests needed to be tended to, I don’t think Sandy’s tone would have been quite so soothing and forgiving.
Especially if it was Hannah as chief stew. My God remember when she went OFF on Hannah for the table not being set at 8am, when the guests were still sleeping and had requested a later breakfast. I would love to do those two scenes side by side. You would hardly believe it’s the same fucking person.
Oh also when she went fucking off on Alissa and another stew for taking their break when one other stew was still working. And that same crew, didn’t she go fucking nuts when they were just talking and goofing around WHILE WORKING?
But, this, NO ONE on the swim platform NOR even on deck, an extreme safety situation, she’s like ‘Now come on Nate, I love your friendship with Joe, but let’s pay attention, okayyyyyyyyyy??’
Although she has turned her shit around since that filling in for Lee debacle season where she acted like a tyrannical fruitcake trying to turn the departments against each other, the way she speaks to stews versus the way she speaks to deckhands is fucking night and day. She’s got that boney finger wagging though.
She shouldn’t really need to be telling her bosun to “stay focused” for fuck sake. The fact that she was so understanding and pleasant about this is actually pretty messed up.
So Nate was a sucky bosun when he had an inexperienced team, (that was his excuse) and now that he has an experienced team, he’ still a sucky bosun. And that’s fine by Sandy. Got it.
Again, no laundry drama. Could it be because it’s not really that complicated?
And possibly the crew is doing their own laundry, but I’m not 100% sure about that. I’ve been saying all along that’s what they should do.
Nate whines to Aesha about his little softball reprimand from Sandy, and poor Max has to shit, and he won’t even stop crying to Aesha that he got in trouble, so Max can leave the swim platform.
Nate then has the audacity to correct Max for approaching him to ask if he could go shit. Dude, displaced anger. You should be bitching at Joe for not following instructions after taking a 45 minute break.
Awkward dinner planned for the two remaining ladies and Bachelor Joe.
Ashleigh tells Alicia she thinks he’s more into her. (Alicia) I still don’t know which is which.
They actually seem to get along with each other, which is unheard of in this situation.
Nate radios Joe and he’s “on standby in the crew mess.”
AKA he’s doing nothing. Nate bitches at both guys. I don’t know what he’s so worked up about. In the evening hours, after they clean up is when the deck crew is typically done for the day as the guests are no longer doing water activities. That’s why you see them helping the chef and running plates a lot of times.
After Nate bitches at Max for not being busy when there’s nothing to do, he tells him to go on break for two hours.
This dude needs to get it together.
This ‘romantic’ three-way dinner gets underway.
The more Cathy tells Kizzi how into Max she is the more interested she gets in him.
This is where things start to go south with Bachelor Joe. He tells Ashleigh and Alicia he’s into both of them and wants to get to know them both better after the charter.
They view that as very insulting, and I guess you can see their point, but to be honest they both seem like the exact same person. Same hair, looks, size, personalities. I get why he would be confused and not able to decide.
I don’t think he meant long term, dating them both.
He leaves the two ladies alone to complain and they collectively decide he has ‘pussy energy’ and he’s no prize. I already knew he was no prize.
******
Ashleigh was serious about being extremely put off by the proposition last night, and leaves without even saying good-bye to him nor Matchmaker Amy. Alicia not so much. She stays. She seems still into him.
They depart. Aesha makes fun of the way he hobbles off with her with their arms linked. He tells her that his hands are sweaty. This guy NEEDS to be loaded because he has zero game.
Not seeing this lasting very long after the dock. Do they even live anywhere near each other?
Aesha had her hopes a little high for anything to come of this. Did she not meet this guy?
Crew day off the following day.
While I love Aesha’s energy and excitement, sometimes she just lays it on a little too thick.
She awards Cathy a stripe and Kizzi is pissed, but pretends to be happy.
After dinner they head back to the yacht where Kizzi proceeds to throw herself at Max.
I don’t know how Cathy didn’t see this coming. Nathan is still sulking and goes right to bed.
