so I missed last week’s recap. The ‘huzbands’ had a little dinner meeting and we see that Lisa made John demand an apology from Justin.
John Barlow is one of the House Husbands I feel really bad for because he so badly doesn’t want to be in his marriage, but doesn’t have the balls to request a divorce.
The Eddie’s are two other examples – Eddie on OC and Eddie on Potomac.
You can just tell these guys can’t stand their wives. John’s getting a very slight backbone this season and being a little snarky with Lisa about minor things. Like she kept repeating what she was wearing to the mob party and saying maybe I’ll wear this or that “with a FURRRR…” She did sound kind of stupid.
In this episode he was making fun of her for agonizing over what sunglasses to pack. Good for him, but it’s a little too little and a little too late. She fucking owns this man.
Can I quick address this look of Bronwyn’s at her meeting with Heather when she expected her to beg to go to California. (I am a little surprised she ended up not going btw)
Not only were those earrings ridiculous to be sitting around your house in, but she didn’t even go with what she was wearing.
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Mererdith and Lisa have spa day. What a tough life they have right?
I saw today online that Seth is the CEO for ‘Big Lots.’ That’s his ‘big’ important position in Ohio. So confused on the Ohio thing. I thought he had a different job before that was also in Ohio, when Lisa was making fun of them for not being able to buy a home because Seth changes jobs every five minutes. I feel like he was also flying back and forth to Ohio then.
That was the infamous or maybe famous, “prostitution garbage whore” tirade.
Heather meets them to complain how she’s not included on the arguing trip to Cali.
We quickly switch the subject to Meredith bitching at Shawn about some comment he made about Brooks.
Should we just make Brooks a Housewife already?
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We get a glimpse into Bronwyn and Todd’s ‘Eirka and Tom Girardi’ style marriage. Didn’t she think when she decided to be filmed with him, viewers would be able to identify this type of aggressive and abusive behavior?
It’s obvious he’s so not into this show (not that I 100% blame him) and not comprehending the dynamic.
A few episodes back he completely shut her down talking about her daughter and the weirdo grandparents, and said “I’m done talking about this.”
Like dude that’s not how this works. Didn’t someone explain it? Not to mention she was upset and emotional and that’s so not what you say to your wife. I’ve had things said to me like that when I’m venting to who you think is your partner, and they ust don’t give a fuck. It’s dismissive and hurtful.
Especially coming from a guy that was constantly all in HIS feelings and ‘ohhh poor me’ constantly.
Mary is also not attending the trip, I’m assuming because it’s a couples trip and gramps has no interest in going, and honestly Mary probably has no interest in being with him. Honestly I think it’s the main reason Heather was left out too.
Todd isn’t even looking at her in the FaceTime convo. He seems annoyed as hell. Also seems like it doesn’t take much to make him annoyed as hell.
He literally is a grumpy old man.
Did he really just say he ‘doesn’t want a weekend of drama with these people?’ Is he serious? These people? That rhetoric is also kind of telling.
Bronwyn replies “I don’t either” when she knows full fucking well that’s the whole point of these trips, and she has every intention of stirring up drama.
So although I am seeing he’s an asshole and not defending him at all, if she was misleading him about this trip being all fun and games, then you can see his annoyance about the immediate fighting as they got settled in their vaca mansion.
Maybe she assumed he’d just deal and play along? The dude clearly has the personality of a dish towel. A dirty dish towel that smells bad.
So he’s much older than her – old enough to be her dad, not that good-looking, let’s be honest, has no sense of humor and comes off as unlikable and arrogant, but is insanely rich and successful.
Does anyone in their right mind think she would have looked in this man’s direction if he wasn’t wealthy. I don’t want to label her as ‘a gold digger’ but all of the signs point to her being a gold digger.
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Whitney ordered some new outfits from Temu for the trip. She discusses with Justin, his and John’s current friendship status. Whitney forbids him to apologize to Lisa as she made John request.
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Now the sunglasses comment from John as I mentioned above. You can tell she’s not used to him talking to her like that. It’s like he’s dipping his toe into the water. ‘I’ll make subtle little digs to see what she does -hee hee hee…’ Maybe next season he’ll be telling her to fuck off.
John seems not engaged in this conversation whatsoever as Lisa yammers on. Dude blink twice if you’re not okay. He honestly seems miserable.
He lets her know Justin said he is ‘thinking about’ the apology. Who says they have to think about an apology. It sounds utterly ridiculous.
If you have to go home and ‘think about it’ then come back days later and apologize what does that even mean? Nothing.
Why are we even discussing the Huzbands’ stupid little pissing match fight anyway? Like can I get you two a tampon?? Or some Midol? Or some herbal tea?? Like really.
This is excruciating.
Lisa cries about Henry’s little birthday party diss sitch and tells John she hopes she’s being a good mom, and he delivers a very lackluster emotionless “you totally are.”
This man wants out.
I do agree with her being called a bad mom is a shitty thing to say to a woman. Beyond shitty. Unless it’s a fact such as a woman who desserts her kids or does nothing for them. Then that’s different.
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It’s PJ time to Palm Springs for Bronwyn’s trip. People do realize Bravo pays for and plans everything, so they’re not really anybody’s actual trip. Bronwyn claims she paid for the PJ? Doubt that.
Only a two hour flight from Utah to SoCal. That makes me jealous.
Whitney is definitely donning one of her Temu or Shein specials for the flight. She doe realize it’s going to be warm there right? Not sure about that face she’s making as she enters the plane.
Maybe she realizes she looks idiotic in a pleather biker Shein get-up when she sees Bronwyn in a bright yellow summery (not Shein) dress.
They discuss seating arrangements on the plane due to all of the Housewife strife. Why does Bronwyn keep repeating she doesn’t want any drama? Isn’t that why we’re here?
John fills in Seth on his girlie fight with Justin at the party. I’m so embarrassed for them.
Bronwyn’s pissed about her convos on the plane about Heather and doesn’t feel they’re siding with her. So that’s a bad way to start the trip. Especially when she promised her extremely bitchy and cranky old geezer husband that there will be no drama.
These finicky women seem to approve of the accommodations. “Oh my gosshhhhh so prettyyyyy, this is amaaaaaaaaaazing Bronwyyyyn” as if she had anything to do with it.
Soon they’ll be fighting about bedrooms and bathrooms and bath tubs. Because that’s a normal thing to do on a free trip.
Seth runs around the house making sure Meredith has a fucking bath tub. Keep in mind I think they’re here for two nights. This tub thing while cute a few years ago in the beginning, has now ran it’s course. It’s no longer funny and literally no one cares that Meredith likes to bathe.
Seth’s yap session about the tub dilemma every time they travel is fucking insanity.
And let’s be real; would you really want to take a bath in a random bathtub? No, that’s a yeast infection waiting to happen.
She is dressed like a go-go girl in case you all missed that. She tends to dress in this style for trip for some reason. Airplanes mean short skirts and high boots for some reason.
I find it really hard to believe there are no bathtubs in his fucking mansion. Really hard to believe. Seems like a fake concocted problem. If you can even call it a problem.
Whitney tells Justin they have to salvage the trip “because I’ve never had a friend go this above and beyond on a trip…”
Did you all think she was going to say something sweet and heartwarming about Bronwyn and she literally just complimented how bougie the house is (that Bravo plans and pays for.)
That’s so shallow. Jesus these bitches are something.
So in other words, be nice to Bronwyn because some coins have been dropped (again not by Todd nor Bronwyn.)
And can Justin STOP with the designer logo T-shirts? He looks asinine. Absolutely asinine. He gives me the heebie-jeebies anyway, and wearing that shit makes him look like a pimp.
Lisa invites Seth and Meredith to ‘meet them in Europe.’ She doesn’t want to stay in Italy too long because the food is too fresh. I don’t even know what to do with that statement.
Who the hell doesn’t love the food in Italy?? Who the hell says they don’t like their food fresh??
From one very cringe worthy statement to a very cringe worthy scene with Bronwyn and her dad, I mean cranky husband.
So they have this private jeweler, supposedly coming by the house who drove from LA.
The asshole tells her “Bronwyn’s excited to see you, or I mean what you brought anyway.” That’s like NO PEOPLE skills whatsoever. Just stop at ‘excited to see you.’ Pretty sure she gets it, ass.
The whole scene is awkward AF. I don’t believe he had any intention of purchasing 5 million in jewels right there and then. She’s basically begging and pleading for this frumpy old man to buy her these pieces. It’s gross.
‘He loves to buy me jewelry’ she says in her yap. Yeah, well he doesn’t seem too excited about it right now to the viewers, Bronwyn, but if you say so. Or maybe just not 5 million dollars worth.
The small talk is excruciating with Bronwyn and the jeweler.
“They’re a perfect match right? They look like headlights.” As they stand there and stare at the jewelry in awkward silence.
She tells the lady she wants to try them on and they’ll think about it and get back to her. Old Beer Belly Todd is not giving the green light for the purchase, clearly.
The woman wants to punch her in the head I’m pretty sure. I feel like Bronwyn is a little Erika-like in thinking that the money is a bottomless pit.
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I have nothing to say about Angie and Shawn trying to play volleyball. Angie basically made a fool out of herself pretending to be athletic. I guess they were having fun so that’s what matters.
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Moving on we have Lisa, John and Meredith lounging by the pool.
Meredith: “he’s been working so muuuch latelyyyyyy and he’s probably on a calllllll, it’s so out of controlllll.” Some sort of ‘Big Lots’ emergency, no doubt.
This from the woman who was grinning ear to fucking ear in Ep 1, when she disclosed he was employed in Ohio again and frequently away. Not sure what his obsession is with Ohio. The girlfriend lives there maybe?? If so, Meredith and I have that in common. One of my ex’s girlfriends he was fucking while we were together lived in Ohio. The other one lived two miles away. At least one of them was cute, and not the on that lived two miles away.
Like is that area rug $29.99 or $19.99??? It’s a very urgent matter that Seth Marks MUST resolve on a Saturday afternoon while vacationing in Palm Beach, CA.
Seth joins them with a kalamata martini for Meredith, which sounds awful.
Lisa’s like “I don’t even know what a kalamata is??” It’s an olive dumb ass, Miss ‘Italy’s food is too fresh…’
So the drink was to ease her into his announcement that he must fly out to Ohio immediately in the am, for an area rug or frying pan emergency, (or to see his girlfriend, either one.)
Meredith is so pissed, even though she seemed super stoked that he’s out of town 90% of the time so she can do whatever she wants, like fly to NYC to see HER side piece.
“This doesn’t add uuuup” she tells him. Hmmmm, maybe I’m onto something.
Now suddenly she doesn’t like that he’s gone all of the time.
Meredith hints at marital troubles again, due to his traveling. So confused.
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Bronwyn feels like Meredith and Lisa are isolating themselves from the rest of the crowd. Haven’t they always been known to do that??
Whitney wants an apology from Lisa, and Lisa wants an apology from Justin.
So far no apologies are taking place. It’s an apology triangle.
Shawn is wearing some really short shorts I’m just saying. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.
Angie wants to break the ice with tequila shots. These ladies do not know how to do shots. On what galaxy do your sip shots? Everyone seems boring, and bored.
Like bring the whole bottle of Vida out.
The guys seem desperate to make conversation. Are they feeling a little inferior or what’s going on? Is it the old rich chubby guy that’s changing the dynamic or what? They make some jokes that I just don’t get. I guess because I don’t have a dick. “We kicked our coverage??” What ?? I have no clue what the fuck these dip shits were talking about.
Bronwyn supposedly left the group to ‘take a leak’ (aka set orders from production…) I’ve never heard a woman say ‘take a leak’ by the way. So they bring up Heather’s absence and supposedly the others were going to reach out to her but no one did.
Lisa decides to call her, FaceTime of course. I’m sure Heather is excited to see them all lounging by the pool in bikini’s when she’s in Utah.
Bronwyn returns from her ordered bathroom break to see Lisa on the call with Heather and is not pleased. Lisa, just to be extra messy, even turn the phone towards Bronwyn.
Well that’s not awkward. Lisa and Bronwyn engage is a stare down of sorts, then start bickering.
Brownyn has eluded several times that she’s paying for this trip. I know she’s new and all, but we’re not new viewers, and we know how to read and research, and we kinda know the ladies do not pay for, nor plan these trips.
Can someone tell Bronwyn this is public Housewife info??
The Heather and Bronwyn feud is confusing to me. Especially after a glass of wine. She’s cranked up though. Maybe she needs a wine.
That thing Bronywn said at the end of the discussion did make sense, that there seems to be a double standard when she has beef with someone veres Lisa having beef with someone. Lisa was kind of speechless, and that’s hard to do.
Off topic and one of my random fashion moments but as corky and eccentric as Bronwyn’s style is, she is wearing the most basic and boring white bathing suit, like ever. There’s no style nor bling to it whatsoever. I expected sequins, crazy straps and loud colors. What the fuck is this?? The sunglasses are super cute though.
She looks like a cross between Ronald McDonald and Dracula in her yap but wears the most basic bathing suit I’ve ever seen.
Bronwyn vents to Whitney and Lisa vents to everyone else. The guys bumble around with their towels wrapped around them not knowing what to do.
Tell me again why the guys are here??
Case in point: Grumbly Revenge of the Nerds Grandpa approaches Bronwyn, and demands to know what is going on. His tantrum over this is so unnecessary.
Can she not ditch this dude? I mean, there’s no prenup.
“I told you I wasn’t going to deal with this with these people.” I love his ‘these people.’
Not to nitpick, but Bronwyn did kind of start it. She could have let it roll off that they called Heather when she returned from her fake bathroom break. Not sure why he’s all ticked at Lisa and John, and demanding that they leave.
This interaction is disturbing and triggering to those of us in previous abusive relationships, the way he reprimands her like a child, and her staring at the floor and looking humiliated, but at the same time not really, because she’s used to this treatment.
He wants to tell John and Lisa they should leave. Did I mention Bronwyn started the ruckus? Does anyone think maybe she should say that?
So poor unknowing John, not the most confrontational guy, is sitting in his little chair and minding his business when Todd approaches him and tells him they need to go.
John is used to this, so he doesn’t give a fuck. He’s thinking ‘cha-ching’ probably when they argue.
Poor guy’s like scared to death. He very obediently says he’ll talk to Lisa and quickly pops out of his chair.
Bronwyn listens to him bitch and whine like a sissy to her, not acknowledging she was a main part of the drama. Is he going to send her home too?? Or just send her to her room with no supper?
John breaks the news to Lisa that there’s a new sheriff in town and he ain’t puttin’ up with no Housewife drama!!
I guess no one gave him the script.
Lisa doesn’t seem to be taking the request seriously as she braids her hair staring at him like she doesn’t comprehend.
She’s probably mad John is such a pussy and didn’t stick up for her.
