Summer House 2/7/22

I missed last week’s review – sorry guys. No fair when there’s a double feature on Mondays. Then my DVR didn’t record it. I think it was just messiness over Craig’s arrival? and some Kyle and Amanda drama back home in NY, where they talked out the situation in The Hamptons when Kyle got shitfaced and decided to stay out all night, and not call nor answer his phone. He couldn’t promise to stop doing that. Oh, and I cannot believe Amanda wore pink pajamas out on the town. She’s young and skinny and hot. I had to laugh when Lindsay said “let’s get you changed.” I was thinking the same thing.

Amanda shouldn’t be marrying him. It seems like they don’t even have the same goals. Right away that’s a problem.

Kyle wants to be a party boy until he’s 80, and run his beverage business. Amanda wants to buy a house in the burbs, have babies and never work again.

I also don’t think she’s too enthused about working for Kyle. Last year it seemed like she was more into it. She was bragging that she was in charge of the “merch” sales, and she was killing it. Now, I don’t know.

Also I tried to get some Loverboy beverages, just to try it (for research purposes of course) at this beer/beverage place near my house, that only has about 400,000 different kinds of flavored and craft beers, and hard seltzers and what not, but they didn’t carry it. I asked the dude that worked there about it, and he said “it’s not available in this area.” I live like 3 hours from NYC, so I was a little surprised.

Has anyone tried it? Some people on a Bravo FaceBook chat page said it wasn’t very good when I posted and asked if anyone tried it.

Craig is really drunk and talking/slurring to Paige about the drama with Kristen Cavaleri I think.

He tells her they’re not ‘exclusive’ and he just ‘came to go swimming.’ This is all weird. Craig is acting arrogant, and Paige, I don’t get because she’s been all braggy brag about stringing two dudes along. Like how many times have we heard about “my hot Italian model and my cute Southern guy..”

I can relate totally to Kyle hating the pillows. I am picky about pillows too. I hate when they have no firmness whatsoever and your head just sinks to the mattress? – who crazy person can sleep like that ?

Alex’s dad (not the Asian parent ) tells him to have more fun. Alex does need to loosen up a little. Listen to your dad!!!

Paige is pissed that Craig is fucking around. But they’re not exclusive, so I guess he should be able to juggle two chicks if she’s juggling two guys. As she has reminded us of. A lot. She’s reminding me of Buzz Lightyear on Toy Story. He kept reminding the other toys that he was more superior to them.

More Coors Light – Lindsay is NOT drinking Coors Light! what is going on?

They go to a pool party— with a violinist – I dig that! Kinda cool and bougie – Check out that 100 lb bottle of Rose !! Paige tries to lift it – think it weighs more than her.

I think he’s annoyed he’s not the center of attention
This is NOT bougie

is Kyle wearing Lily Pulitzer?

Lindsay says that she’s dating ‘five guys’ – Kyle: isn’t that a burger place?”

Ciara confronts Lindsay whether or not she is banging Austen ? Lindsay points out she was trying to pick up the bartender at the pool party. Is that a yes or no. Ciara needs to get over Austen. I can’t imagine this chick cannot get any dude she wants.

Oh fuck me why is Luke coming? I think that will be a testosterone overload. And I just can’t deal with him. I wonder if he’ll try to get with Ciara again since Hannah and her tantrums, are out of the picture.

Andrea is turning on the charm for Paige. I would personally choose Andrea if it were me, but what the hell do I know, I don’t exactly have two dudes fighting over me. (I have three !! hahahaa) Did you see those modeling scenes ? Oh Lordy.

Kyle is not coherent, and this oufit gotta go.

I’m still getting used to how they leave every weekend again – Last season filming (2020) they were here for the long haul since they were all working remote.

They’re doing scenes in NY at their apartments during the week, which I think is a new thing. Paige is talking to her mom and shares how she faked like she was on a date when she was home with pimple cream on her face – oh my God she cracks me the frick up – reminds me of the Differin commercial.

Amanda’s 30th is coming up – (90’s theme) and she is already preparing to be disappointed. Girllll get ready to be disappointed on your birthday for the rest of your life when you’re married or in a relationship. I was married for many years, and was in a two year relationship, and I may have had ONE great birthday in my adult life which I’m pretty sure I planned it myself. Don’t depend on a guy to do it. They suck at planning things. They suck at everything.

At least her outfit is a step-up from last week.

Glad she ditched the jammies look !!

Not excited for Luke’s arrival. I could actually do without Luke.

So they all have gifts for Amanda except Kyle. Loser. Loser. Loser. he planned nothing got her nothing – hmmm been here and it sucks !!! Everyone is giving her a gift !!

UHHHHHH — Didn’t know we were doing gifts

The girls try to help him out, and book a trip to the Bahamas. After the booking, he says that his passport expired “during covid” whatever the eff during covid is?? – I guess March 17 2020 until present? Well it doesn’t matter. He has no passport and they take at least a few weeks to get when you’re renewing. ( I think.)

So they cancel it – can’t they go to Cally or Vegas?? or somewhere cool in the US ??

Lindsay and Danielle go out. Lindsay has some hot date. Mya is annoyed for some reason.

They play spin the bottle and Ciara and Alex eat each other’s faces for twenty minutes. That was awkward. She likes him now. Good – can she stop yacking about Austen?

Austen who ???

Amanda is crying because her birthday sucked. (grown up) girls always cry on their birthdays because we have this grand idea of it being this most insanest awesomest day. We want people (our bf or husband) to but a necklace and fuss over us, for one day. One fucking day. It’s one day out of 365.

Guys why is this hard ???

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