Last week’s highlights, can you not help but chuckle when Justin says “with Whitney being a public figure…” Pretty sure his CEO didn’t refer to her as a ‘public figure.’ That’s not the even the reason, there’s that, and he knows that. Poor Justin. Did you all catch Whitney on WWHL with a horse ass pony attached to her head, and poor Justin in a Gucci logo sweater and Gucci baseball cap? He looked like a weirdo pimp trying way too hard to look young.
They both looked tacky as fuck, and very ‘Utah’ or Jersey. Definitely NOT New York City. Although I think they think they look really NYC.
Looks like Whitney dragged his dumb ass to Canal Street the second they landed in NYC and made him wear that shit to WWHL. It was bad. You be the judge. Looks like he gained weight too due to his unemployment status.
Whitney and Angie with this number they’re doing for the audition, is ‘When the Saints go Marching In’ a thing in Utah?? This kid auditioning is singing it too. I literally haven’t heard this song since grade school in music class.
What is WITH these outfits. Other Angie also looking very ‘Utah’ – or Jersey.
Anyway, Other Angie and Angie argue outside this theatre or whatever, where they’re doing these fake auditions, about talking behind Lisa’s back. Angie plays all dumb. Other Angie: “Lisa is done with that” Is she Lisa’s bitch or what? This reminds me of Bethenney on RHONY having Alex confront Jill.
I do believe Elfman told her he was opening this ‘Finsta’ as we’re calling it. And she knew about it from it’s inception. Was it his idea? Probably. But if she knew about it, and encouraged it, yes I agree, she goes down with the Evil Santa.
Other Angie shares that she ‘liked’ a comment that was posted seconds after it was posted, so yes, let’s do the math. They were both in on it. You would think with this toddler that this 52 and 40 year old have together, they would have more more constructive and important things to do.
Whitney in her yap apparently had no idea of this before hand, when she decided to do this weird little duet with Angie. I actually do believe her. I haven’t believed one other fucking word that has came out of her mouth since the season started, but I do believe this. And of course this bothers Whitney since she and Lisa are new BFF’s.
Angie looks guilty as fuck. Jen enters the scene, and you can already see she’s all hyped up and about to unleash Crazy Jen. Angie looks ready to fucking puke. Elf on the Shelf is NOT gettin laid tonight! Pretty sure she went home and unloaded on that frumpy gnome! (unless they were in on it together and he took the fall)
Jen: “this is very hurtful.” Okay enough, who is having Erika Jayne withdraw right now?? The fucking arrogance?? Just like Heather later points out, she’s facing the rest of her fucking life in prison (we can hope, I think sentencing is coming up soon) and this is her concern?? An insta poking fun at her? There’s shit all over the place about her on the daily making fun of her, she does know that right?
Jen wants her to “take some accountability, because that’s your husband!!” If Jen were smarter she would just laugh this off. Yes, she has more important things to worry about, like how raggedy she’s gonna be lookin in prison when she doesn’t have her ‘glam’ with her.
This is all quite the scene out on the sidewalk. Just what we love on Bravo. People making a fool out of themselves. Do you ever picture yourself acting like these Housewives act, and your family and friends ACTUALLY still wanting anything to do with you?
So back inside auditions still going on, we have ‘Amazing Grace’ being sung perfectly by this dude. So sad when he is forced to stop over the Jen drama outside, when a dude comes in to let Heather know. This kid was in the zone too. Oh well, kid, duty calls. Priorities. Housewife strife trumps Amazing Grace. Duh.
Heather complies and heads outside to see what’s up. Immediately – Angie – “do you know my husband to be a bad guy?” Heather: “No” Okay whatever, that all means nothing right now. Like how well does Heather really know her husband? I mean, if he created an account just to troll housewives, he clearly has a screw or two loose.
Heather sticks up for him further by saying he apologized and took accountability.
Jen is having her sobbing crying ass hyperventilating pretend meltdown, and it’s just so over the top.
Heather in her yap (who we can always count on to put things in perspective with a little humor)
“Jen is in a washing machine of turmoil, because she’s about to be indicted on Federal charges with a prison sentence looming, not because she’s getting trolled by Chris Harrington on Insta.”
Lisa arrives, and she apparently thinks that “she’s the only one that can sing.” So complete arrogance right off the bat, we love that for her. She clearly didn’t hear the Amazing Grace dude.
Heather is SHOCKED to see Lisa. And we now have what is going to go down as a KIND OF iconic scene in Housewife history. According to Insta anyway. Viewers were loving it.
Not that it’s that climactic when compared to, ya know, say Scary Island (which I’m just learning that Kelly was literally smoking meth that night, that’s why she was acting so wacko) but iconic in a raw and realy kind of way. Which we’re not seeing much of anymore. I think she should totally record this song, and release it for Christmas this year. Which she should be working on like now. I was seeing mixed commentary on Instagram, some thought flawless, others thought terrible. I would say in the middle – was it great, was it perfect? No. Was it good? Yes. Better than Luann on RHONY who calls herself a singer? Hell yes.
She seemed nervous and ready for it to be over. She doesn’t carry the notes on the ending lyric of each line, but I think she was just nervous.
The best is when she closes her eyes, or the worst according to Hugh Grant in ‘About a Boy.’ He was like disgusted when the mom and that weird kid closed their eyes while singing.
So Lisa enters the lion’s den after her audition, and everyone is sitting in the waiting area. Angies, Whitney, Danna.
Whitney and Angie practice this horrible routine yet again. Can someone explain to me why they are doing a dance routine for a choir audition??
They literally remind you of two six year old’s. Is Whitney at some point going to grow up and start acting like an adult? She’s past the point to be acting like this constantly. She’s 36. She has kids. It’s sad.
Jen fills Lisa in on “Heather siding with Angie.”
Jen is still pouting over this and scolds Angie again about the insta thing, and Angie says she’s sorry, and seems sincere. POr maybe she just wants her to shut the fuck up.
Now Lisa is pissed because where’s HER apology? Even though the account is called ‘Shah Xposed’ it was mostly about Lisa and these messing around rumors. So Angie still hates Lisa over that catering cancellation argument last year. Do we think Lisa actually did that? I’m not sure. It did seem a little Lisa.
Lisa and Heather argue about the Dad dying and when precisely he croaked, and when he was in hospice, and when he was in the hospital … OKKAYYYY we alll get it. It’s such a stupid argument because they were not even close friends, so who the hell cares if Lisa asked her about her dad or not. Heather is being sooooo melodramatic about this stupid text from Lisa, and Heather is not usually like this.
Heather does admit what I said last week, she was confused on the day the text arrived. Maybe she didn’t see it right away. I don’t believe she was intnentionally ‘lying.’ They almost look like they’re going to hug, and just come to terms with this, and see how it went awry, and got misunderstood, but no that is not what happened.
Heather is still pissed and not having it, walks away, and exclaims “I lied, and you’re the best, and your name is cleared.”
That tweet with Heather’s dad’s obit was a ridiculously awful thing to do. It was just cold. She should be ashamed. Does she realize everyone forgot about that accusation from the reunion like six months ago? Not sure why she was sos f ocused on “clearing her namw.” over that.
Meredith and Seth pull out all the stops to convince us they have a great relationship and great sex.
I’m fast forwarding – I’m not watching this again. What is Bravo doing? Tamra and Eddie in the tub like eight years ago, hot, (maybe pushing the envelope a little, still not as bad as the Whitney on all fours and Justin simulated sex act) Meredith and Seth in the tub – so NOT. Seth looks like a crazy person. This is fucking gross. Did they get paid to have this bubble bath in the scene I wonder?
Heather goes to look at the site where her new Beauty Lab is being built. Good for her. Good. For. Her.
So this scene is not as annoying as Meredith and Seth in the bubble bath, but still annoying. Lisa and John go out to dinner and cannot fathom how the server kid “does not know who they are!!!” as they order their Vida tequila drinks, They discuss all of her siblings’ divorces. Again.
SLC needs to keep moving a little better. It’s getting so redundant and kind of dragging.
Jen and Coach discuss the Insta account, again. Sharrieff gets all inspirational, sounding like he’s doing a sermon or something. Blah, so annoying. Making excuses for her, again.
I cannot buy, what they are selling with Whitney and Lisa being buds. It just so proves that Whitney’s fight with Heather is fake and contrived, and this friendship with Lisa is fake and contrived.
I think she’s trying to ‘branch out’ her ‘character’ to not just be friends, and do filming with Heather. Which is kind of where she was at because she wasn’t really friends with any of the other ladies. Last season she started out being friends with Mary, but that went left when she didn’t answer the phone “when she was driving carpool!!”
In order to be friends with Lisa she had to ice Heather out, to give her more access to being filmed. her budding friendship with Lisa, and fighting with Heather (over nothing)
I guess you would call this a ‘play date.’ They both have theirs sons with them playing Bball.
These outdoor scenes seems warm out for Utah, in February. I’m trying to remember if we were having unusually warm weather over the winter, here on the east coast. I don’t remember. Maybe we did. They ditch the kids to gossip.
Again with the ‘lying’ verbiage, did Heather not say she got mixed up because she didn’t see the text right away?
Whitney tries to talk and describe to Lisa her strife with Heather, and she doesn’t really explain it when Lisa questions “in what way?” She rambles nonsense about “hurting her” but doesn’t give any fucking reasons.
I call BULL SHIT.
“Justin parting ways with his former employer…” Parting ways. Got shit canned because of you. But parting ways is an interesting way to put it. Just like it’s because you’re a ‘public figure.’
Heather hasn’t contacted her about it. Whitney she also told her at the ski lodge that she wasn’t really ready to be friendly again. If we all recall that. Remember at the end they were discussing this whatever. “There’s been space and I haven’t really understood why.” I kind of like her jacket. Probably Shein or Forever 21.
Ding Dong — BECAUSE YOU TOLD HER YOU WERE NOT READY TO MOVE ON AND HAVE IT BE THE SAME. (or something like that)
Whitney visits Heather. Whitney has now decided “we’re friends” after saying in her yap in the last ep or one before maybe, that she couldn’t really forgive her yet for “weaponizing her pain” or some fucking shit. Whitney says to her “why am I chasing Heather down?” Okay so right off the bat that’s annoying to Heather.
BECAUSE YOU TOLD HER YOU DIDN’T WANT TO BE FRIENDS. She needs to be better at this for this to be believable.
Whitney: “you didn’t call me when Justin is fired.” Heather says she didn’t know.
Whitney keeps pointing out how she showed up for her choir try-out. Heather, always the smart ass, “I’m glad I could have an event for you to show up to and be the hero.” Kind of what it DID sound like. Since she repeated it four times.
Now they talk Lisa, and what we’re all so sick of hearing about. I am team fucking Heather here.
Heather gives her the business and says “it crushes me that you would take this opportunity to exploit me like that, and make it look like I have been a bad friend to you, and ignored you.”
She breaks it down further “I’m in trouble for not knowing a rumor that I never heard, I’m in trouble for a horrible event in your life that I didn’t know about, sorry I’m not well versed in the gossip mill and Lisa isn’t calling me to tell me everything going on in your life”
Whitney knows she is making complete sense and she’s busted for pushing this agenda for her ‘story line.’
Whitney says she doesn’t get ‘what the lie was?’ Whitney, girl pay attention!! We all know what the ‘lie’ was, the lie was that there was no fucking lie!!!
Heather is pissed that Lisa is saying that she was ‘there for her’ during her dad’s sickness and death, (aka ‘lie’ #1) and Lisa is pissed because Heather said she sent the “how’s your dad doing?” text AFTER he had passed, when in fact, he hadn’t made the official cross over at the time of the text. (aka ‘lie’ #2)
Neither are fucking ‘lies’ they are a string of disagreements confusion, and misunderstandings.
It’s like a fucking ‘Three’s Company’ episode for crissakes. Chrissy, go the hell home!
I love how Heather goes into her room leaving Whitney alone in her living room. Then when she tries to go after her, Heather pushes her to get out.
This is what this bitch deserves.
I can foresee Whitney being ‘traumatized’ that Heather PUSHED HER!’ It was a slight shove to let her know she really did want her to leave.
Everyone should record that scene on their phones so they can refer to it when Whitney blows it out of proportion.
