Real Housewives of OC 8/8/24 – Part 2 – Ring Me!

Emily and Shane’s 15th anniversary Valentine’s date – where to even begin, but I’ll try my best.

Wasn’t there some weird story that I’m not recalling the details on right now, about how they met and came to get married?

Like it was weird. They didn’t date in the traditional way. I feel like Emily saw dollar signs, even though I know she’s an attorney and can take care of herself supposedly, the dollar signs certainly don’t hurt. Just sayin.’

So they go to a Pizza Restaurant. Yes it’s a bougie pizza place, but keep in mind it’s Valentine’s Day. I’m assuming no one made a rezzy so they had to take what they could get??

She sort of embarrassingly shushes him when he says “15 years is pizza!!”

“I went to the gym, I didn’t see you there.” Can you imagine a man saying that to his wife? We would lose our minds.

He calls her Miss High and Mighty. So TRUE. And maybe she missed the part where he said he worked? That whole convo was forced, and made zero sense.

Just to prove her point, Shane orders a pizza like a normal person and Miss Foot-Long-In Her-Purse orders the chopped salad.

At first I thought the googling talking points was weird, then I came around because it seemed like they had fun with it.

That pizza looks fucking fire!!

Yes we know Emily your childhood sucked because your were poor. Got it. Sorry your mom didn’t marry a gazzillionaire like you did. Maybe there’s not a lot of those in Ohio.

This broad is living proof that money can’t buy your happiness, because her overall behavior does not scream ‘happy and fulfilled.’ I said what I said.

Now the ring upgrade presentation WAS odd and a lot of viewers seem to think that as well. Perhaps this was a reenactment of the original gift giving? I don’t know, but it’s this huge gorge fucking rock and Emily is just like ‘yeah whatever, looks nice’ as if it was the horrendous tacky necklace David got for Shannon many moons ago.

Either she’s just a spoiled bitch or the scene was fake and she’s a bad actress. Maybe she was afraid of overdoing the excitement? Looks NICE??

Whatever.

She has the server fetch that stupid half-naked portrait she presents him. I’m sure the eye rolls were rolling when the staff was given this instruction.

I don’t know where the hell this ginormous Playboy pose framed portrait is going to get hung in a home with children? But okay Emily. Someone needs some attention.

I don’t thinks she’s kidding about the life insurance policy by the way. Bitch wants her payoff for marrying this dude that she sort of kind of liked.

Would you really present this to your husband in a crowded restaurant? Sounds like there’s going to be some anal tonight.

******

Gina and Katie meet up for some coffee and convo. Gina is really trying to lose the Valley Girl twang that she so got dragged for last season. But it’s still there.

Katie confesses she felt ‘abandoned’ by Gina at her golf event in her confrontation with Heather.

Gina seems to be doing a confusing 180. She told Katie before the event that if she didn’t tell Heather herself that she was digging into the alleged paps arrangement, she was going to tell her. Remember? “Ima tell Heather if you don’t.” Who could forget THAT??

Are we trying to pretend this didn’t happen even though it was last week? Like we try to pretend everything from past seasons didn’t happen, but last week is kind of pushing it, Bravo. We’re not THAT forgetful. Like Gina and Tamra also struggling after their divorces, it’s like ‘POOF!’ In the Housewife world’ – didn’t happen, they don’t care what we recall. Even though we can pull up old episodes in two seconds, so I don’t get it. Should we be insulted Bravo thinks we’re stupid? Probably.

And here we are, this new Gina confessional look that was ‘rolled’ out this week. Second hand embarrassment. Is the hair the horrible part or the very unflattering fit of the dress showing off her three levels of flabby midriff sections? Girl. Whoever told you this looked good hates you. I think Emily should be schooling Gina on hitting the gym by the looks of this disaster, instead of Shane.

Gina claims she’s ‘very close’ with Heather even though it was painfully clear when they were in front of cameras in January of this year to film the season, they clearly hadn’t seen each other nor spoken since they went down almost two fucking years ago.

That was evident in their reactions to seeing each other at Heather’s New Year event, and in way that she talked to Terry about his stroke. It was clear it was the first time she had seen him since it happened almost TWO YEARS AGO.

So no Gina you’re not at all ‘really close with Heather’ and you’re also not a Realtor, while I’m at it telling you things you’re not, I may as well throw that in there.

And know what else you’re not Gina?? Not a woman Heather would ever hang out with. EVER.

All of this is fake. All of it.

She talks so nasty to Katie while still proclaiming this close and personal relationship with Heather.

And I love how Gina acts like this fucking piranha towards the women, then just apologizes and pretends to ‘feel bad’ and care.

******

Shannon meets her Gene the Machine for lunch, aka her father. She shares she needs to do the breathalyzer in her vehicle thing, which I would certainly hope so. She doe seem to be able to drink which is strange, guess it’s a Cali thing, or it’s a who-ya-know thing.

She complains to him about John threatening to sue her if she doesn’t cough up $75,000 stat.

You know to be honest I did steal this thought off of a TikTok video, and I don’t know why it didn’t occur to me, I’m a little embarrassed, but who has Shannon been sued by or threatened to be sued by since she’s been on the show? That would be Jim Bellino and Jackass John.

And what do these two asswipes have in common? In relationships with Alexis Bellino.

So let’s do the math as to who the sue-happy individual is. She clearly hates Shannon.

Jackass John is expecting a ‘payment plan’ from her, and Gene the Machine advises her to fight it and go for the jugular.

******

Tamra and Alexis have a visit, and Tamra can’t believe she would actually be driving to see Alexis. Well you’re doing a job Tamra, and as with any job you’re frequently given instructions and you’re merely following them. Please stop pretending otherwise.

Alexis’ extensions are awful. Here’s the ‘enjoy’ thing again, only Tamra mixed it up with “I enjoy being around her.”

This has to be what producers are making them say. This cannot be coincidental. Don’t they worry it makes the inauthenticity of these so-called friendships obvious, if they’re all reassuring us the friendships are real using the exact same verbiage? I don’t think I’ve ever said I ‘enjoy’ someone.

I can just hear it. Okay 3-2-1 we’re rolling, now say you ‘enjoy’ Alexis!

Then the empty looks on their faces after this ‘enjoy’ delivery looks like they want to stab themselves in the eye, and can’t believe this is what they’re doing for money.

Tamra can’t fucking stand Alexis.

Speaking of producers feeding these bitches their lines for the yaps, Alexis goes into this odd overly rehearsed and bizarre tangent referring to Shannon as ‘Debbie Downer’ and herself as ‘Happy Go-Lucky Lexi’ complaining that she did not make the cut for the golf outing.

Johnny has barely drank anything since they’ve been together she claims.

All of this money discussion this season is so awkward and ick. When we’re not talking about how Jenn can’t afford her rent, it seems like we’re talking about how John gave Shannon money when they were together, and he wants it back.

Alexis’ attitude about it is very smug. Why would you want your new guy suing his ex for money? Wouldn’t that skeeve you out? Wouldn’t you be thinking what’s he going to do to me when we break up?? Wouldn’t you just want him to not have contact with the ex??

Alexis is so proud that she has ‘proof’ of the money exchange, which is stupid because Shannon is not denying it.

I’m struggling with this. Are you??

******

The next event for everyone to argue at is hosted by Gina. Shannon brings a friend.

Alexis asks why she was not invited. Who DOES that?? And is Alexis an actual Housewife or just ‘a friend.’ I don’t believe she’s holding an orange, therefore she does not and should not be included in every event and it should not require an explanation.

Also whose friend is she? Oh right, Tamra’s, cuz that’s the game we’re playing now. Fake friends.

Shannon orders a drink, her famous vodka soda, which honestly she shouldn’t be doing during filming.

Tamra jumps right on that calling her an alcoholic while guzzling her Espresso martini.

Shannon assures us she thinks about her DUI every single day. To be fair, I doubt she remembers much about it. Wasn’t her blood/alcohol like three times the limit?

Vickie gets asked to weigh in and she snubs the Housewife way, you know the insults, the yelling the fighting. Then later we flash on all of Vickie’s yelling, insult slinging and fighting, over the years.

There’s confusion if it’s 60, 70 or $75,000 that Jackass is demanding from Shannon.

Happy Go-Lucky Lexi is quick to correct everyone that it’s $75,000.

I love how she brags that she calls him ‘Johnny.’ K Alexis good for you, did ya come up with that one all by yourself?

Alexis puts these screen shots of bank transfers in everyone’s face.

Again, Shannon’s not denying it. How fucking dumb do you sound right now? Pretty dumb.

Alexis kind of slipped when she’s pointing out the two separate transfers on her phone because she says one was for the face lift and one was for him just ‘giving her money.’

‘Giving’ – she said giving, not loaned. So Jackass John needs to just shut it and stop coming off as desperate and broke. He gave her the money.

Shannon says he always repeats “I’m a good guy!!”

What dudes typically say that are NOT good guys say. My ex walked around saying that too. Guys that are actual respectable and decent guys don’t have to remind and convince everyone they’re good. They just show it in their behavior.

Vickie never goes to check on Shannon who fled the table.

Now ‘Lexi’ claims she wants to get to know and like Shannon. Emily quickly calls her out about that lunacy when she was just flashing around bank deposit screenshots in order to embarrass her.

With that Alexis quickly runs out and leaves. So that’s all it took huh? Emily take note.

Vickie and Tamra bicker about whether or not Shannon needs rehab and should quit drinking. Is this how the whole season is going to go?? Of course Shannon needs rehab and to stop drinking but she won’t do it unless SHE wants to. It’s a pointless argument.

But then again pointing out a pointless argument on Housewives is like… What? I don’t even know what to compare it to. Feel free to share in the ‘comments’ if you have an idea.