Real Housewives of OC 12/22

Please no party for Shane. Does this little dweeb who’s apparently not too bright REALLY need a party? Guess he has been doing exactly NOTHING for twenty years? MUST. BE. NICE.

But I get it, we need to have a gathering so Regina, Karen and Gretchen can gang up on Kady. (or was it Cady?)

Stupid Gina says flies in New York never come near the food — I guess New York flies have better manners. You would think it’s the other way around? Serious question- was Gina always this dumb?

Heather visits Jen. She feels the need to apologize for her party for no particular reason, ending as it did. Jen does the “rich people laugh.” Guys if you don’t know what I mean, you gotta play it back when they’re on the phone.

She comes over and they sit at her bar in the kitchen and Heather discloses that she has a short torso. What’s funny is that I never noticed that before, but did that on that hike with Nicole on the first episode. Also noticed how WEIRD she was walking with her stomach area pushed way out ?

They start the gossiping. Heather ! Do you mean YOU Gossip too ??? Jen bitches about Noella being condescending to her. Who cares.

They play that annoying flash of Heather saying that Shannon doesn’t take accountability, But she has said MULTIPLE times that she takes responsibility. . . for sharing a piece of gossip. From twenty years ago. To her friends.

They also replayed Heather stating that if Shannon ‘can’t take responsibility,’ she sees no way they can move forward. But she did take responsibility – so can we move forward ? Please ? We’re all sick of this ‘story line’ that seems so contrived and desperate, and each ep is reminding me more and more of Mean Girls.

They are now doing that ‘bum bum bum’ weird little drummer boy sounding background music, on OC too? Thought that was a Salt Lake thing. It seems to suit them more.

Noella and Nicole meet for alcohol. And more alcohol. Nicole seems to be encouraging her to drink. A lot. And she does. Noella says that there are “tears on her tits.”

Which sounds like a really bad country song. Nicole does not care about the tears on her tits. Nicole is coming off as being really shallow. She keeps telling her that she looks “cute” and ‘she’s going to find him, and it’ll work itself out !’

Noella takes a few sips of straight tequila, and they have the hair brain idea to call James the Desserter. Of course he doesn’t answer. Noella begins to come unglued.

If anyone should have stuck their husbands/guy’s toothbrush up their asshole, it’s Noella. (this was apparently written in Lala’s book on Vanderpump, that she did this to Randall when they were fighting…)

She says the fact that he took his toothbrush means he’s not coming back. Do they not sell toothbrushes in Puerto Rico?

So apparently Nicole is not very empathetic, nor much of a hugger, nor one bit concerned about her friend. Noella is really breaking down after the ten various drinks that Nicole gave her.

Twitter is buzzing about how bad her make-up looked in this scene.

And Nicole, don’t think it’s possible you could have cared ANY LESS.

“There’s a lot of people here – I’m not feeling comfortable”

That whole scene was uncomfortable. She is acting grossed out at having to hug and comfort her friend.

There There … okay can we done hugging now ???

Shannon is shipping things out for her food and lemonade thing. (Real for Real) And complaining about how David isn’t helping enough.

Poor rich girl Shannon, and her rich girl problems. Her monthly installments and ‘two lump sums’ just do NOT cover the poor woman’s $20k/month rent. Shannon doesn’t realize she doesn’t need to live in such a large house in such an expensive area. How freaking ridiculous is is to pay five freaking figures per month in RENT ??? Please – save it Shannon.

Gina and Emily, and the boys meet for dinner. Emily says she’s starving and only ate a granola bar all day. Shane outs her for eating a foot long Subway sub. Emily —- there are so many healthy options in LA area for lunch — Subway ??? Subway ?? Not to sound like a food snob, but she should make better choices. Not to mention that place just reeks when you walk in the door.

Now Emily and Gina gossip about Shannon. Moving on —

Also, seems there needs to be belly dancers at this party, for Shane the 50 year old that finally passed the bar on the fourteenth try.

Stella and Shannon go to her holistic dude since she hurt her back playing volleyball. Stella finds this mostly amusing. She says in her interview thing that she’s just went to shut her mom up. so rude.

She says in her interview her mom has never really gotten over the anguish from her stupid dad. I would agree with that. She didn’t say stupid. I added that. I wonder what David was so afraid about with the girls going on the show this season. If you missed my article and post from a few months ago, here it is again. He tried to throw his weight around and forbid their daughters from appearing this season. If you ask me, and I know you didn’t, I think his life and marriage are miserable, and he is afraid they will say something ? What else would his problem be ? If he has nothing to hide, what’s he so worried about ?

https://www.the-sun.com/entertainment/3397533/rhoc-shannon-beador-fired-david-teen-twins/

Noella and her mom lounge poolside. Think the days are numbered for this type of lazing around the pool without a care in the world. Did you know Noella also has a 6 or 7 year old daughter from a previous marriage ? As far as I know, I don’t think she has mentioned this. Maybe her father doesn’t want her mentioned or shown on Real Housewives. That may not be a bad thing.

Noella seems to think her sweetie pie who abandoned her and his two year old, is going to “come around.” Mom is like yeah, no.

I think the belly dancers at Shanes party are going to be a bad idea. Well actually I think this whole party is a bad idea.

Emily’s friend is pretty optimistic if she really thinks this party is going to be ‘flawless. ’ Emily can’t get into her dress. Guess it’s the foot long Subway subs. Jodie is like, “it’s going up nice.” I do appreciate this girl’s positive attitude. It wasn’t going up nice.

Noella calls Shannon while she’s getting her make-up done, and reads that stupid ‘adjudicating’ text again from Heather DeBra.

Heather continues to KEEP being just awful and nasty every time she opens her mouth, only when Shannon is being discussed of course.

Nicole tells Heather in the limo to this stupid bar lowering party, that Noella called her a fake bitch, while she was completely black out shitfaced. What a see you next Tuesday. Talk about ‘a fake bitch !!!

This party is going to be U – G – L – Y. Heather says that she only met her three times.

Takes like .2 seconds to see that she IS a fake bitch

Heather also talks about how everything is just so great and kosher with all of the other ladies, Gina, Emily, and Nicole, and that detestable SHANNON is the ONLY one that just CANNOT BE HER FRIEND !! “Of course we’re going to the party together, because everything is fine with us. And Gina and Emily. It’s just SHANNON we don’t like !!”

Does Heather get slipped 5 or 10g from Bravo every fucking time she says this? Heather we get it. I am totally hearing “You can’t sit with us !!!” from Mean Girls, when they’re mad at Regina, for wearing sweats to school on the non sweat wearing day.

Emily can’t bend down and pick up a fork in her dress. We did see the installation of it, so I can believe it. Maybe she should be wearing sweats like Regina George when she ate too many protein bars.

Her friend Jodie runs to the rescue. The fork seems to go right back on the table ? Is this Jodie a friend or an assistant ?

Who the hell graduates form law school and doesn’t pass the bar for 20 fucking years ?? And we thought Craig from Southern Charm was a slacker?

Heather approaches Noella and is probably dying to say SOMETHING about the fake bitch comment, but doesn’t. She gives her a gift for being “so nice to Max” when she went up to her screaming that ‘she’s bi-sexual too !’ I literally thought that Heather would be annoyed by that.

Is anyone else really surprised that Heather who has the biggest stick up her ass ever, is really ever so non chalant about her daughter being bi sexual ?

So the party is getting going. Shannon arrives. Again – Emily brings up this confusion with the trust thing — what do these dip shits not understand that AFTER they ran and told Heather what Shannon asked them NOT TO – she THEN said they can’t be trusted. Again ? What is so fucking confusing about this??? I didn’t even have a drink yet ??? I need one!! I need six or seven like Noella had!

This is clearly Bravo created. Emily, the fucking LAWYER who did NOT need fourteen tries to pass the bar, is too smart to be acting like she cannot comprehend this. She says she doesn’t know how she “got brought into this?” Uhhhh again, are the actual VIEWERS being gas lit now?

Were we imagining that Emily got tipsy and approached Nicole and proceeded to scold her for suing Terry 80 years ago, and never saying anything about?? But she doesn’t know how she got “brought into it??”

Heather does the evil stare down to Shannon. They attempt to discuss this. Again. Shannon didn’t recall saying “manipulative” to Heather. Just that you can’t trust them. Emily runs and gets Heather like a 4 year old telling their mom on their sibling. Heather verifies that she said ‘manipulative.’

Which they were.

This is just so Mean Girls right now. The three of them are literally ganging up on Shannon. Shannon says she wishes to speak to Heather. Again. And apologize. Again.

Heather makes another remark about it taking so long for Shannon to apologize. Again.

Then she proceeds to like, follow her around, until they make this big huge thing about going somewhere private to talk.

Shannon explains why she didn’t reach out right away, and explained what I said was probably the case last week. That she wanted to give her time, and she didn’t seem receptive when she apologized the first time

Then what happens is just so beyond absurd. Heather gets all Erika Girardi on Shannon with the ‘promise not a threat’ – and is reiterating this “coming after her family…” horse shit that makes no sense.

She knows it makes no sense. I cannot stand even stand her face.

CAN THIS “STORY LINE” BE OVER ???

Dang I wanted to see the belly dancers tonight.

Oh and correction, I did have that wrong last week about Noella and her now-ex, and the house in Puerto Rico. I clearly was not paying close attention during that scene. Noella was pissed that he doesn’t just want to “sell it” to pay the taxes he owes form his law business. Well he can’t sell the house in Puerto Rico, where would he and his toothbrush go ???