I don’t think I mentioned this last week, I was kind of focused on Sara acting stoned: Ayan’a head piece/wig combo looks like a Halloween costume you would get at Party City. I don’t know who told her that looked okay, but it definitely does not look like high fashion by any stretch.
Let’s try to get through this quickly. Thank God it was only 2 parts.
Brooks and Taleen are bitching at each other over their argument at Stanbury’s housewarming.
Was it okay for Raffi to get involved in their argument and stick up for his wife or was it not? That is the question.
And what is the answer? How about who cares.
Brooks must know she fucked up, as she insists with Andy that they just need to move on because this is ‘making her mad.’
OhmiGod not the dresses in Bali and how the Carolines and Taleen threw tantrums about having to wear them for one entire fucking hour.
The designer, ‘SuckDick’ was very disappointed that they wouldn’t wear the dresses.
So that WAS funny.
Andy tries to get Brooks and Taleen to officially make up which never even lasts anyway once they start posting shit online. It starts out okay when Brooks accepts Taleen’s apologies, but Brooks is not at all keen on apologizing to Taleen for her bitchy social media posts
Brooks seems to be getting very defensive about these comments that she sleeps around for money and gifts, and calls Taleen and her husband out for having threesomes. That’s kind of the condensed version of the tweets.
We’re also still arguing about Brooks wearing Taleen’s clothes in season 1.
Brooks is like the worst fucking apologizer.
They break for lunch and they all start complaining to the other about each other. If that made sense.
Well actually Brooks and Taleen do confront each other and bicker back and forth about ‘moving forward’ in Taleen’s dressing room.
Please can we ‘move forward’ and stop fucking bickering over moving forward?
Taleen shares with us that Brooks wanted her on the show to “take Stanbury down.” Now that does sound like Brooks’ speed.
This argument Brooks started over Lesa not having her event at her salon is such a waste of energy.
Had Lesa asked this, I am certain she would have said no and ridiculed her for asking for something for free and being broke and being a moocher. Can’t you just hear it all now?
I don’t get this whole thing with the journals at all. Stanbury still claims that Lesa ‘steals’ clothing designs and that her face creams are someone else’s. Or something like that.
Andy looks bored shitless, and like he’s had it with these extremely petty arguments. He’ll sit through this but refuses to do Below Deck Reunions??
He needed to wear a red tie. He needs to match the theme.
Will there or will there not be this Sergio/Stanbury union of cells? Technically I guess that’s already taken place? Will this baby ‘on ice’ as we’re saying now materialize?
They flash on Stanbury saying she thinks her marriage will only last ten – fifteen years because she assumes Sergio will not want her when she’s old(er).
Brooks is disgusted with Stanbury and Sergio being the subject and how much he loves her.
She’s the type of person that just cannot be happy for anyone, ever. She’s mad she has to bang Shrek for free shit and Stanbury has this thirty-year-old hottie who worships the ground she walks on. (but he is too clingy in all fairness.)
Surrogacy is now legal in Dubai but this baby is still not on the way. Andy doubts he ever will be.
Sara and this fucking horrible horrible horrible dude. I think the ‘cheating’ is the least of the problems. First of all they weren’t even in an actual relationship, so she makes no sense.
The dude was cleary nasty, enjoys torturing women, and has zero ability to act like a grown-up.
Remarkably Sara claims she doesn’t regret introducing and parading this fruit loop around her kid.
Sara brushes it off and claims he’s fine after the nanny kidnapping plan episode. This woman is an oddball.
I feel like Lesa is always looking at herself in the camera.
So now Lesa and Ayan’s friendship break-up is on deck. I do think Lesa tries to manipulate and dictate to Ayan what she is supposed to say or not say on camera.
Prior to filming there was Rhianna drama. She was pregnant and follows Ayan so Lesa asked her to see if Rhianna would give Lesa’s maternity line a shout-out.
Or something along those lines.
Ayan did ask her to which she said sure, but she was pissed that Lesa brought up during filming, and I’m not really sure I’m following why.
Now there’s voice note confusion. Did Lesa know it was coming up at dinner that night? Did she not know??
Producers saying she knew. Lesa admit she knew right before the dinner, but she didn’t really know??
What is the translation here? I’m struggling. Thought I was pretty good at speaking Housewife, but maybe my skills are declining.
Stop saying VOICE NOTE!!!
Now we find out Lesa was clamoring to sit next to Andy so asked Ayan to take a back seat to her. I can totally see her saying that.
Andy calls this surface petty BS, and he doesn’t get it. Ya think? Fighting about who’s sitting next to him at the reunion?
The bragging feud was also so ridick. Why? Because as they play back scenes from that convo between Lesa and Stanbury that weren’t in the original scene, she was totally bragging, sucking up, and trying hard to impress her with how her husband was buying some fucking farm in the English countryside. Fully staffed of course.
I hate when the Housewives exploit their kids and make it a Housewife situation. t
Like what does Taj being bullied have to do with Lesa going nuts at the Finale party?? If the kid is being bullied, maybe stop parading him around in front of Housewife cameras.
Ayan said she wanted Lesa dead or some shit. Ayan denies it, the source being Brooks of course.
We have our first walk-off of the reunion. Lesa needs a minute.
Again, I don’t know what Lesa having kids has to do with this, as she complains to producers. She’s the one that fucking brought it up. She has boys. They give not two fucks about this shit and they never will.
Everyone bitches at Brooks for ‘setting them up.’
Ayan and Lesa agree that their doors are open to possibly mending their friendship.
Good. I can sleep tonight.
They then exchange shady gifts with each other.
I know it’s not a contest as to whose shady gift was the shadiest but if it were, Taleen wins in calling out Brooks for wearing her dress. She refuses to read the card. I think when she saw the dress she new immediately what was being referenced.
Brooks is not amused.
The ventriloquist is a close second. He’s a little scary though.
Sara spare us the sermon. She has so many things in her own life she needs to work on.
Let’s see if there’s a Season 3. Maybe that thing I heard that Dubai isn’t allowing it anymore is false.
