We pick up with Captain Creeper finishing up her convo with Lily, telling her how she sucks.
What do Sandy fans have to say about this interaction? Thought she was always so fucking fair, so willing to give people a chance, and all about teaching and mentoring.
Oh that’s right, Sandy Captain Creepy fans don’t get outraged, they just make excuses for her. They make excuses for the horrible way she treats crew members, you know because she’s nice to some of them. The ones she likes, or is attracted to. This conversation was not handled correctly, it doesn’t motivate her to do a good job, by threatening that she’s going to be fired.
Also, not to beat a dead horse, but I thought it was chief stew’s job to train a third or fourth stew, because that’s sure what she said to Hannah. Hannah’s probably watching this, and thinking the exact same fucking thing. She told her this was an entry level position and it was her job to get her third up to par.
This girl came on board, being honest about the fact that she had zero experience in yachting and being a fucking maid. Let’s not sugarcoat it. They’re fucking maids.
Captain Dickhead promptly reports back to Tumi, and in a very gentle way, lets her know that her management skills suck ass, which they do. They knew that she was inexperienced. and explains to her that somebody with a good attitude is better than somebody with experience and a fucking shitty attitude. Tumi pretends to be in agreement with that, but you know, if she really was, she wouldn’t have presented this to her in the first fucking place.
She cackles like a hyena and her yap, bitching that she wishes she would’ve gotten fired. This girl might wanna look into invisalign or braces, or something. In this position where you’re waiting on bougee people, like get your teeth in order. Sorry, not sorry if that’s bitchy, but she’s a terrible person. It must suck to have an awful personality and be ugly. Put that Bravo cash to good use, girl.
Also, still on my rant, can someone remind her about how she WANTED to get rid of Nat so badly? So first she wants to get rid of somone that was a work horse, and could run circles around all of these idiots, and now she wants to get rid of Lily? Yet she’s okay with Kyle??
God, this girl is a fucking dingdong.
******
New guests are repeat customers. It’s a group of guys that kind of took a shining to Kyle last season. But Kyle was a completely different stew last season. He was all happy-go-lucky, personable and loving to joke around and interact with the guests This season not so much.
Kyle is pretending that he has a migraine, although he also admits he’s never had. He asks Tumi if he can lie down for ‘half an hour’ and you knew damn well as soon as he said that, once he hit that fucking bed, it wasn’t going to be no half of a damn fucking hour. It literally turned into almost 24 fucking hours. He just added a mere 23 and a half to his request.
He blames all sort of factors in his yap. Emotions, stress, the moon, the stars. Hayleigh is also still at the doctor throwing up.
Frenchy continues to complain about not getting his breaks. What is going on with everyone? Suck it the hell up.
Tumi checks in on Kyle. He’s still whining up a storm. Now it’s a MEgraine that he has. Jesus, these two are like Tweedledee and Tweedledum. I’m sure Tumi was hoping he was drag his fat ass out of bed to do lunch service. She doesn’t know Kyle very well does she?
Lunch is underway and this particular demographic, are always very demanding to say the least. Demanding and difficult to please. They send the caviar back, and request that it be sitting in crushed ice as opposed to ice cubes.
They randomly complain they need a baked potato. Tumi must watch Housewives, she makes a joke that they’re trying to be like Kathy Hilton. I’m guessing she’s a housewives fan. They also bitch about the fresh mint with the asparagus.
More plates, more silverware… I’m really enjoying this bitch running her fucking ass off. When they find out baked potatoes will take 20 minutes, they decide they don’t want them What a bunch of prima donna assholes.
As long as Kyle is being allowed to lie in bed, he will remain in bed. This is exactly like his ankle injury from last season, and his toothache, and his anxiety issue. I mean come on, is this guy for real??
I really think Max has severe ADHD or possibly mild autism. Either that, or he’s a really tall four-year-old.
Sandy checks on Kyle. and tells him he should go to the doctor if his headache is not gone because “this isn’t normal.”
Which is true, if he actually had a migraine. Most of the times over-the-counter pain relief does not work for migraines. I take a prescription for mine. Sandy is clearly annoyed. Maybe she was hoping that if she said he had to go to the hospital, he would suddenly decide he was okay, because he would feel stupid going to the hospital for a fake headache.
Lara takes him inland so he can go waste some people’s time. The sunglasses are a nice touch. I’m guessing he looked up MEgraines, and saw that you have a sensitivity to light, except it’s dusk and almost dark.
Guests are sitting around waiting for dinner, and actually look kind of bored. Tumi complains she has no idea how to interact or entertain them. I’m not even sure what that means and how that was okay to say. It’s as bad as Kyle saying that the group of girls on a previous charter, that he didn’t want to be on service because there was ‘nothing for him.’
I feel like these two are forgetting that they are fucking paid servers, and are literlly here to serve the fucking guests, regardless of their sexual affiliations and preferences. These two are fucking clowns.
They did locate Brazilian dancers in Italy. Somehow, whatever random request is made by the guests, it seems to be readily available. Lara is happy to pick them up. I mean, more than happy.
Of course, these assholes are bitching about the steak, and the temperature not being right, even though they were told that more well done is steak is coming. And what the fuck is medium well-ish??
Katie Flood of now Winter House fame, (which I just am not able to really get into, it just seems like it’s a big fat fucking orgy) is texting Luka, and telling him that she’s nearby. His reaction seems like they must have had some prior hook-ups.
Kyle continues to milk his fake headache. He texts Sandy that he’s ‘staying on land.’ I can’t imagine they will keep him at in a hospital for a headache. I also can’t imagine Bravo would pay for a hotel room for him to stay in.
I’m sure he’ll be feeling better to party the following night, and will be plopping his big ass on the couch to stick his arm out to retrieve his tip money. He should at least buy dinner on their next night out.
Nat is now texting Luka. I feel like we have a new stud of the sea. Move over Lee!!
The guests want ‘a big gay breakfast’ whatever the hell that is. Jack is also confused, so he’s making rainbow pancakes. What the hell else is a gay breakfast??! There are even huge sausages, complete with dick shaped serving platters, but that’s not gay enough for the grumpy little entitled dude. Does he want a lttle semen in them?? Like wtf dude???
He scoffs, and says he could have done that. Well then dude do it!! He’s one of those people that feels the need to put down straight people, because they are not in his world. The curvy chick seems to be okay with rainbow pancakes.
Kyle calls Sandy, and he sure sounds chipper. After some tests, the official diagnosis is he was ‘exhausted and dehydrated.’ I’m sure if the rest of the crew went to the hospital for a fake migraine, they would all be found to be exhausted and dehydrated.
So, where are the sunglasses? Now that it’s sunny.
Kyle is on my list of people that I just could never see in a normal relationship, so I wish he’d stop making these references to this dude that he’s in a fake relationship with. He hugs Sandy, like he just came back from fighting a fucking war.
Tumi calls the guests’ energy ‘draining.’ Max complains that being a vegetarian, there’s no food available that he can eat. Vegetarians kind of annoy me in the way that because they don’t eat any protein I believe they never feel full, and take it out on everyone else that they’re starving.
Kyle greets the guests, as they are somehow managing to sit here looking miserable in this fucking setting, because their breakfast wasn’t gay enough.
So it appears there was a vegetarian pasta Max could’ve eaten, but I guess he just wasn’t feeling pasta, probably because he’s sick of it, so he’s lashing out. Sandy beckons him to the bridge, and bitches at him in front of Luka and Lara.
Sandy wants him to apologize, and he blatantly says no, and walks away. She needs to realize dealing with Europeans, other than the Brits, is a little different. They don’t fucking entertain this bullshit. They don’t give a fuck about hierchy. At all.
