Multi-course dinner with the captain continues. I hate to say ‘killin’ it’ because that reminds me of Captain Creepy, but he IS killin’ it.
Let’s see if Solene still has her cold sores/pimples/herpes blisters by her mouth or if production still has her covering them up.
Jess regrets fucking around with Barbara’s feelings. And fucking around with Solene.
The clean-up for this feather pillow fight, I can’t even fathom. Why would they do that to themselves? Was that ten minutes worth this?
Kyle refers to Solene as an ‘ick.’ I would say that’s putting it mildly. And he’s just now realizing this?
Barbara defends her to him as ‘not being THAT bad.’ Solene is making a complete fool out of her.
Jess seems to be getting ‘the ick’ too.
So… the tip. Yeah. Helen said there was ‘extra’ and said she had not one single complaint, yet the tip sucked ass.
Sometimes I wonder if the tip amounts are even real. Like do they give these people a bigger discount if they allow production to say their tip was shit? How embarrassing. Why would you want to do that to yourself?
Why would that dumb bitch act like it was so generous? Maybe she can’t do math.
Or work a calculator.
Kyle jokes on the way to dinner that he and Helen did something other than being her ‘floatation device.’
I assumed he was joking.
Kyle hits up a chick from Boston at the bar. Within 6.5 minutes they’re making out. Within 8 minutes they’re at the beach. Then they move it to the bathroom. I think animals even take longer than that.
I think Fraser should probably lose the judgment. Jess takes a pic.
I’m judging, among other reasons, because public bathrooms are fucking gross. I honestly wouldn’t put this past Fraser though. I think he’s just jealous.
Kyle has no case in saying Solene gives off ‘the icks’ now.
Solene who ‘cares about nothing’ as long as she’s the one doing the using and disrespecting, now seems to care that Kyle hooked up with some stranger on a filthy piss covered bathroom floor. Kyle tells her he wants nothing to do with her.
Jess takes another stab at hooking up with Barbara. She asks Barbara on a date. She accepts.
Kyle again claims he had sex with Helen in the water as he was cradling her. Not sure how that would even work.
I don’t know if he or Solene is the bigger slut.
Solene claims she’s devastated about Jess and Barbara. Oh my God.
I think Damo and Fraser are going to rat out Kyle for his Helen claims. Or confront him. Not sure but they are being so extra about it. Like who even cares. It’s the damned theme of the season. Now we’re going to clutch our pearls?? Stop.
Kyle thinks because his birthday was yesterday, he should just keep on drinking even while working. He’s worse than a girl demanding her birthday be a ‘week.’
They throw him a little surprise party.
Fraser is being so dramatic. I guess those are his instructions. Last season he made sure Anthony got canned, now he’s after Kyle. Why are they turning Fraser into such a little bitch? He’s like Malio 2.0.
Wasn’t Fraser extremely flirty with a guest last season? Yes he was.
Kyle changes his story and says he made it all up. Damo tells him that he needs to inform Kerry of what he said, even if not true.
Common sense tells you there was no way of that taking place in the water with all of the guests, crew and camera crew around.
Why does Kerry have to chat with the crew about it? He’s the captain.
So he does this and they all, including Damo, pretty much say they think he was just drunk and talking shit, and it’s highly unlikely since they were surrounded the entire time.
Hugo dismisses it as asinine and not even worth addressing. He has to be the most low drama dude on all of Below Deck of all time.
So tell me again why we’re doing this? It’s not even entertaining because it’s so fucking dumb. “I slipped it in.” Like euuww.
Damo now tells Kyle if he gets fired over this it’s his fault and sort of low-key blames Fraser. I guess we’re setting this up for him to get fired, then have him back next season, so we can have a repeat of Fraser vs Anthony??
We can’t come up with a new story line Bravo?
Hugo goes on a rant in his yap about the crew hitting on the guests. Kyle did not hit on that woman. She basically threw herself at him, or on him, literally. Did he play along? Sure. But they’re also encouraged to do whatever (within reason) for that.
